Chris Taylor BatGuanno – Survival Minecraft Pro Ukraine Mar 14th Twitch stream.

Video Information

Oh Oh Foreign Is [Applause] Oh [Applause] And here it says gassy where the [ __ ] do you get t from an s sound if that one does turn out to be flagged just copyrighted they’ll just play the old one i like her Nick notes i will be like still needs to donate i said if bob’s got to donate which is me and i ain’t got any money you gotta donate too he’s like who the [ __ ] is bob because i also could do my donation thing i said

Uh that may or may not have been me i was just seeing how much money was left on my card and it took off a dollar seven cents and i threw the old card away there’s nothing going on it’s your phone okay that’s what i’m saying this is

Where every time i listen to watch try and watch you guys seen that happen it keeps breaking in and out If you think that you can fix it that’d be [ __ ] awesome so i’ve been having [ __ ] trouble with it for like the past three months That i always have trouble with my phone it’s a [ __ ] piece i mean i don’t think it’s so much the phone that’s a piece of [ __ ] i think it’s probably like that um my network because i go to an extra pcs the same thing aren’t you i can play it all day long

So then ours are cheap knockoff smartphones and they do a better job than the real ones without the samsung galaxy a82 oh no wonder type of problems what the a32 is like 15 years out of date are you [ __ ] serious yeah that’s that’s a 5 year old phone I have an old school phone that’s an old style smartphone with with a single core basic processing and no real uplink of any kind it’s one of those ones where if you’re using one thing you can’t use another type gotcha which is kind of funny because these are just cheap knockoffs

And i had his stream going youtube going and i was watching netflix so sorry it’s not really matching pcs it’s pretty much my phone’s ancient yeah [ __ ] sake it doesn’t even say like what kind of crosses sucks on top of it well they said they have met your pcs and

Their phone looks fine but they would talk about my phone’s like 15 years old yeah the a3 the a5s are 12 to 15 years old i have an ancient phone i know this time i thought i had the new best thing no that’s that’s just a revamp on old

Technology the processor in that thing is 15 plus years old damn i should have just went with just the original iphone you probably would have had better luck oh well thanks for the insult oh why apple sucks huh well the only reason why i don’t [ __ ] uh like the iphone because i actually

Had a friend’s phone her iphone blew up in her face yeah i was the iphone what fives i don’t like apple why do you think i saw my macbook Well maybe that’s her problem maybe not just now hers would have got the update before well i i said i always get an update like every i had that phone since august of last year yeah and i only maybe have to update it maybe twice yeah this one’s got a 12 year old

Processor special now thanks she’s got an antique you really want to get some views you just need to get some boobies on your video yeah no sorry then i’ll definitely have to be like are you super restricted yeah well well i’m not doing it like someone give me some jelly beans jelly beans Okay [ __ ] i didn’t say that i gotta [ __ ] around and say that oh give me some jerry beans well my my cousin said that that um jerry beans no dairy beads it’s the [ __ ] necklaces from mardi gras yeah yeah it’s pretty much a thing that if you take off show the body part

And you get one of those necklaces yeah yeah number one yeah the more body parts you show the more beads you get oh [ __ ] that explains a lot one time somebody gave me a jar for a while oh my god yeah that source is playing it just fine we had a lamp

This is mine oh yeah i rolled up all i had to do was pay what i owed on my old phone which was like 30 bucks you guys suck my exams if yours work i’m done with this phone and i’m gonna cry i’m gonna go downstairs and cry with my daughter no

You die you’ll be okay it just traded in for something oh [ __ ] this works just fine oh look at the diamond two this is exactly seconds off yeah well it’s buffering so [Laughter] that’s great like you guys have the newest phones and mine doesn’t buffer oh i got like 10 million things

Oh well the only thing i don’t like about the team i don’t have 10 million Okay okay now we’re at the water line i wouldn’t want to do it if i just you know play minecraft and destroy everything yeah you might knock me out you know how long it takes it took to build that that was 12 hours of work just that little [ __ ] hole i mean

It sure would be an interesting look i’m just watching it here he just did the circle thing and it popped up our vibe trying to go kill some more trees trees let’s see what i got yeah this one this one was the cheapest phone they had at the time

And it’s kind of funny that the cheap one does better than the one that’s supposedly up to date well i kind of want to get like a better phone anyways i mean the kind of phone i want it’s like oh my god i like it but then in a

Way i’d be too [ __ ] scared to get it um my friend phoenix he has like the new phone that can you can flip it into like a triangle and you can flip it back out oh yeah it’s like galaxy fold or whatever it’s called yeah and he dropped two thousand dollars for

That damn phone i’m like there’s no way you [ __ ] do it there’s no [ __ ] way and then it’s the fact that those screens and now show it there’s been like issues after issue with info well i told him i said i wouldn’t drop two thousand dollars for a [ __ ] phone anyways

I mean it’s bad enough they lucky i dropped 100 on this thing That’s still expensive All right that makes you turn that down that’s funny did you ever get it to do it no i didn’t hook it up it’s time that’s gorgeous i got an alexa our electric bill today was eight it was was five hundred and something dollars okay and then they won’t didn’t no that’s up

Because last month’s was 437 i thought you know what i said i thought you got in a couple days like no it’s five five minutes which is still that’s great that’s doing too that much we can’t figure out what it is and if our company may be healthy But Why are you like that oh because he climbed on there from the bench oh there yeah i fixed it oh the one outside fell off he’s probably down there in the water yeah it should be under there killing zombies that’s cool i don’t feel bad now are you okay now

Um i’m still bleeding and that counts are you okay do you feel better oh hey man i gotta turn his speed on i didn’t know he was gonna be up here wait for you i’m outside it’s not nighttime Just go over here to the middle All right you got to be good oh as soon as i straighten up this hair yeah imagine getting anita in your backpack this big nothing thank you you’re not a woman then okay let me come up with something it didn’t hurt when they stick me in the back of it

Okay the only time it [ __ ] hurt when they stick a hole right through the needle and it felt like as soon after they got to that point it’s like my hometown went like this yeah and i was like [Laughter] [Laughter] and they had to put you back together i’m calling you humpty dumpty

No i’m saying they had to put it back together sure because that’s how that works nice safe it took me two years from almost two years but here from that damn [ __ ] i i i keep telling everyone and everyone think i’m crazy i want to go i want to go through 19 hours

Of pure labor with no epidural they’re never going to see sex and ever again my sister did it all natural by the time they were going to give her the [ __ ] drugs she’d already pushed riley out she almost wrapped around the toilet she said i got a full face that

Doesn’t feel like it’s your front or your back she said i don’t know and then she went to push and almost cracked the baby out of the toilet it would’ve been lovely at toilet baby oh you wanna hear something i was [ __ ] up uh my sister cynthia she uh she she gets mad

Mad because i used to sing this song because what happened her mom pushed her and when she pushed her out she also pushed out the placenta so what happened so they was looking for my sister cynthia so what happened was so that they would go throwing like

Whatever stuff they could get and then they threw her in it and in the trash bag and the soon after they heard her scream and they were like they threw her in the bait threw her in trash bag and i said dumpster baby I said and then i in the middle of a drawer and said well you did belong in the trash so she said dang they threw away their own kid and my as soon as my stuff that found out that they asked that you threw cynthia in the trash bag he was pissed

I said well she did that on i did not mean like i i got hit all the time i said well well i said when you started out life in a trash bag i said you trash you like with your mom she’s like you’re a [ __ ] do you got any

More trash jokes book i said yeah i said you got dumpster baby you got you got you know i i kept going on and on i can’t move everything [Laughter] and then i made up a joke i said i said how did the lame i said how did the

Landfills how was the landfill and she was like trashy oh like you okay that’s that’s rough well she said well if my mom was able to have me a full time i said yeah i’d rather i i’d rather be boring for you than i ever been throwing the trash and we were born

In the helicopter yeah we didn’t even yeah we just don’t remember i don’t think it counts if you’re that small well i mean with uh with my mom uh she went to uh i know two years later i got to meet the guy that flew me to the to

The thing right so what kind of helicopter was it it was just a bay flight like a basic it was like a hospital thing that the whole inside was fitted out was like do i want to know why your mom was in a helicopter because she was gonna give

Birth in the back of the taxi yeah because that kid was at work when she went into labor i gotcha they took us that we were we were too early for the like two early term-wise to be delivered in a normal hospital oh god it was instantly

You had to be in the breathing things well i mean i always heard that heard that when that explains a lot when a warrior is pregnant with twins but there’s always a higher chance of uh the baby being born early yeah we were but i think this i’m getting over i’m getting weird

I’m getting hit by man i know when his dad had a picture of him holding us and her head was here and her legs damn you guys were tiny wow that’s crazy well would you guys want to hear a [ __ ] twist and then and then our grandmom was nice enough to tell

Our mom to just basically give us lakes we wouldn’t survive yeah that was our grandmother for you lovely well lovely witch well i i take the most [ __ ] up train story i have ever heard okay it happened to my sister cynthia okay i my sister said that she was pregnant okay

And what happened was well she had a miscarriage um after she had a miscarriage okay within about was my sister cynthia kept having side effect that she was still pregnant and well when she went to the hospital and they said oh well congratulations your foreman’s pregnant

And and then she was like she said how she was having twins and only the one passed away yeah for putting my half what they this is what she said it was they said it was the whale okay there’s a black river behind me well don’t look well

They said you showcased was well what happened was um that uh that her twins weren’t born like side to side if they were going up and down oh so they only saw the one yeah so dixie was like strapped up in my sister’s rib area so they couldn’t see

It so they saw like the one twin but what happened i soon after that twin passed away and she passed when i passed that child she dropped down yeah and i’m like damn she said yeah turn of events well anyway uh in my steps i started family there are twins um

So it was like they did say straight up cynthia did had a high chance of having twins first time around but i mean i said well that would have been kind of cool if you had friends and sisters my future wife would probably murder me if i ever told her that the

Twins running my family but we were twins our grandpa was twins uncles or uncles twins so twins went really high oh yeah and irish pretty much takes over everything well i told where’s trav i said that if he ever gave me twins i told him i said i

Make sure your opponent had a commission you go get that [ __ ] twisted tie that [ __ ] up for the [ __ ] nut and then he said i wouldn’t say prominent out of commission but she still wants to play with it every now and then what the thing is about it is okay twins

Doesn’t win on my side of the family at all but definitely runs a nurse let me tell you a story all right my family zombies kept trying to getting up on me here so i left for my message what did you do oh [ __ ] you see it [ __ ]

Yeah i wrote [ __ ] the grass oh that’s funny well uh well um like i said um like twins don’t want on the right side for me i followed whatever uh but i tell you the most [ __ ] story ever was it i was talking to this guy okay he

Never told me anything about his family okay so what happened was one day i um i came to his house and i saw there was a guy it looked like him but i knew it wasn’t him i’m like okay this guy be his brother and then that’s where that soon

Afterwards i saw another one and i’m like triplets yeah pretty much and i’m like that looks like him but anything for chocolate well and then after that he came through the door and i’m like do you want to explain something to me he said oh yeah

That’s about to say i’m i’m a triplet we know what’s funny about that we used to go to sam’s club tell me this trip with who left the other one at home he’s like why do i not why does that not surprise me

A lot a lot of kids on my side like my sister sent this she was playing with twins and then you know she’ll lose that one and then my sister harley okay that’s just how [ __ ] up it is we are commonly known for having the most weirdest pregnancy ever well with me not

Really but uh what happened my sister heart different types sister harley what then my sister i want some jungle wood so i can do the railings in a different color well um my sister harley uh she didn’t even know she was pregnant well she was at work one day and she

Felt like this sharp pain in her back that’s usually how it starts and then she didn’t put twitter together so they went to she went to the museum and they said oh were you having a baby she’s like how the [ __ ] am i having a baby they said you didn’t have any side

Effects she said well i mean not really i mean she said i have my usual monthly period i i don’t i didn’t think i gained that much weight and then after that and then out and then my sister jessica of course with her she had a typical pregnancy until we

Found out that anastasia was black and then then after that then everyone and my friend would expect me to have a real pregnancy and i said no not really i said the only weird thing about my whole entire pregnancy is okay when um when i was playing it with melody okay

They they sized my belly up they said that i was supposed to only get but to make about a seven pound maybe 18 inch baby yeah well then after that this is actually quite funny so i had to have a c-section with melody and well when she came out

I and i got out of the inner step because i had no choice but to put me to sleep because i got noon to the epidural and what happened was i woke up i saw melody and i’m like looking at the doctor looking at melody i’m like that’s not my baby

Well last time i checked that was my main each one but that’s beside the point but uh anywho but yeah and they said why do you think this is not your baby i said super big and they said oh oh yeah how like oh yeah we forgot to tell you she was on

She’s about eight pounds 13 ounces no i know i had to get a seat for that one well no what happened with my body and they said that it’s it’s common sometimes with full-time mom it’s just that my body was trying to push her out too early and i was only

Six centimeters with them yeah and what happened my whole entire service went shut And the funny part is they kept saying we need to stop pushing i said please tell me how can i cut off the sensors to you know tell my my freaking body to stop doing the pushing yeah which is natural that’s what your body wants to do

You need to stop pushing good you tell my [ __ ] brain that i tell my body to do that and the funny part about the hyundai situation it was it was like pure pressure of course and i and i keep telling you like i gotta go [ __ ] [Laughter] the

That was what she said and then like 20 minutes later the baby was sitting at the table but the funny part about the whole entire situation they said well you can just do it if you feel like you have [ __ ] do it in your bed i’m like i ain’t

[ __ ] [ __ ] in my bed that’s disgusting [ __ ] your bed thank you guys did they make you wear diapers no no not even my sister had that because she didn’t have she had a c-section oh my god my sister had hers natural and she didn’t wear diapers

Well what they gave me they had gave me like a pad around because i had surgery but it was almost similar to like a diaper but it wasn’t really a diaper per say even though people say it’s a diet book i said it looks like a [ __ ] diet

It’s a dependence yeah it just depends on here like that one but yeah but then um the reason why my she says she sucked it was like and everyone to this day you know i’m a stubborn but we had a chip well what happened was your my uh melody’s down

Which is nothing but a lazy pizza so he didn’t help you no he didn’t help me with the damn the house okay i’m hearing them from having seasons and they say well you can’t overdo yourself what you’re going to whip out your stitches of course and what half of my house got dirty

And i asked kat batson logan likes can you please clean up the house can you please clean up the house i can’t you know and so what happened was i i got tired of being a lazy [ __ ] i spit basically like you know i got up put mailman in her little uh

On my little chest swing them a bobble okay okay can’t think of their card and i started cleaning up the [ __ ] house and logan’s like you can’t do that i said well chloe you ain’t doing your [ __ ] job you’re supposed to be helping me you ain’t doing [ __ ] can you help you with

Your list here at the hospital he wasn’t even holly though what he wasn’t even holly lil i pretty much okay uh when i had mama it was during covet time okay and and it was during the time there was only allowing one person in the room at

The time so pretty much it was me and look i told uh mom wanted to be there by mom got it that logan needs to be listened to with his firstborn child and everybody should be there anyway they would even let him in they would

Even let them in the waiting room yes it was that bad and and um what pretty much what happened i mean logo was nice enough to let my mom come in and stuff like that you know to see anyone but then it was like he wasn’t really

Though so pretty much i was doing my label pretty much 85 on my own that’s [ __ ] up yeah 85 and then well then his uh he was working on subway and he told jack you’re like i want to stay here with brooke well if you stay the book you won’t have a job

Yeah that wasn’t gonna stop me so so he chose to keep his job while i was in labor with the child by myself the only time he was really there with me was when i was about to have my c-section that’s crazy i’ve been like okay [ __ ] yeah me seen you yeah

Um when riley was born i was there the whole time i i drove her to the appointment and she we literally went for like an ultrasound appointment uh and they told her that she was gonna have the baby the same day so i called my job like hey i’m just gonna let you

Know i’m not coming in i’m having a kid i have a good day um um and then and then and she was in the hospital for like four three or four days yeah and i was there with her the whole time i fed riley every time she had to

Have a bottle so that brittany didn’t have to get up because because uh like obviously he was in like a crap ton of pain and stuff so suck better and i slept on his little tiny ass couch for three days yeah i kept sneaking into like the little nurses station and

Stealing soda um they told me that i could it’s like help yourself to the sodas i’d literally go in there and get like six or seven of them about well i had melody at uh she she was [ __ ] the doctor was [ __ ] cool okay the nurses were [ __ ] awesome

Okay um what they did that of course they told me that that with me having a c-section i have to walk yeah yeah you have to yeah so so i was really pushing me in her little thing while i’m walking the hallway and then always starting up when i was

Tired you know because you know i just had surgery and i pretty much i just became a first-time mom and you know what they did the nurse came in and said we’ll take your baby for a couple hours and then i’m like what they said yeah

Take a nap we got your baby so so what happened was i went to the bathroom it was funny i mean it wasn’t like you know they they i woke up early for a nap okay not thinking that they had my child and all of a sudden i know his mama was gone

I start freaking out and then also i’m like i was about to tell him my baby oh you got him and they were just holding her they said we can’t help it she’s just so [ __ ] cute that’s funny because they had that there like they had a little nursery and i was

Like we could take her if you guys need a break like i like now i got it yeah i [ __ ] stayed there and took care of her like literally the whole time by myself the only time they ever came to god was when they had to give her shots

Yeah which is normal well the only thing that kind of pissed me off okay and everyone said you didn’t have no whites to be pissed off i said i kind of did okay i understand logan was a bigger dude okay and they told they gave logan

The option that you can do skin and skin with your daughter logan wouldn’t even do it logan that just means that you like you know shirtless yeah yeah exactly and he would he wouldn’t even do skinny skin with them that’s one of the things that they made

Uh my sister do they said that it’s it’s good for the baby to have contact yeah well i did that with mama like i have a picture of her when i just gonna skim with them but you know but i i enjoyed it but it just kind of pissed me off

That logan didn’t was gonna stand with them i did i said i think that would have been kind of nice you’re doing that with your daughter and i got a picture yep and i got a picture it helps in their development i got a picture of the first time

We took her home well well i was just a savage [ __ ] well well mama always got to point that she loved me more than her dad okay and then and i told him straight up he said why don’t you like me and then to this day and why did you like tomorrow i

Said what if your [ __ ] i [ __ ] just gonna send you you she would have been a daddy’s girl wouldn’t you yeah for [ __ ] face dude that’s sad yeah all you had to do was it yeah like there’s simple things that you do you know it’s just natural yeah it’s something that’s supposed to

Occur well that was what really pissed me off was that when logan never did skin and skin with him and i felt like that should have been a thing that he should have done and it’s like in the start pub i was that they gave me an option they said we

Could keep you away through your c-section and he could be that with you when i was on the table getting away from he’s like of course i was scared as hell you know yeah that’s normal he would even go in though oh god they had to drag me out i’d be like [ __ ]

You better call some police because you’re going to need a few of them he wouldn’t even go in there he wouldn’t even they had to drag you out of there no they told me i could stay in there somewhere oh yeah well this was mel now when she was born yes

That’s a big ass [ __ ] baby yeah that came out of me a couple months old that’s a big ass baby well and then and then like i said logan held him of course this is melody’s dad yeah but but yeah but that’s the only thing that

He held up but then most of the time when i was at the hospital and i was here and they told me that i would be stuck at the hyper for five days since i have a c-section because i wanted to make sure that because tackling when you

Do a c-section they’re pretty much taking all your organs out yes and they want to make sure that you know i wasn’t getting any kind of infection they want to make sure that i was having my usual bowel movement and was able to pee properly and test this stream is great

That’s better than our regular schmutz but then i so yeah so logan was even there when i was here and i was doing it all by myself he was out he was like he was i’m sorry a little bit like boss that’s [ __ ] up so yeah kiss my fluffy so putting feet

So pretty much i was doing this all by myself pretty much [ __ ] yeah which kind of makes me sad but then i wouldn’t trade it for the world but in a way i keep telling people they said what would we want then you would change about your label i said i

Wish it would have got printed by a different man and they said why because i said you know when a woman gives birth you want to make sure her man is there with her right do the whole thing mine wasn’t even there mine wasn’t even [ __ ] them

Really i was there the whole time when riley was born the whole [ __ ] four days sleeping on that little [ __ ] couch i left one time for like not even an hour uh to walk a couple blocks away from the hospital you know those blocks are [ __ ] really big yeah

I walked like two blocks away and i might have spent fifty dollars on snacks at udf across the street that’s fine well well my label wasn’t really that bad everyone said that what did it felt like when you were in labor brooke i said i said it felt like the worst cramp i

Ever had yeah like my sister said it felt like she had this [ __ ] real bad well well my mind felt like it was a different like of course you men would not understand this yeah um but um but it was like the worst period crap and this was before i even

Had the epidural so i i sticked it out until i was about three and a half centimeters and i’m like okay [ __ ] you know you girls think me give it to me you [ __ ] well i would tell fine i was terrified i’m like i didn’t like the idea of

Having a needle in my back well yeah that’s like pretty much anybody especially looking like five or six inch needle well so it was like the thing is about the first thing is trying to fight a zombie i was so terrified i was literally like logan of course i would

Have been over like that like like on the hospital bed like this okay and i had to bend over like this and i was like i was so terrified i was literally pulling logan who was like who was like a 365 guy into me and i was calling him because i was so

Terrified my mom was on [ __ ] like uh was on a video chat on on facebook messenger without the whole entire thing and my mom was like whoa i’m like what are you doing mom she said that’s painful and i’m like mom you’re not helping [Laughter] i can just see i could imagine that

My mom’s my mom was like oh that’s remember you gotta curb the fella all right so sure since we hey since we go to uh pumpkin farm should i make a watermelon farm too uh sure yeah just build it the same way well but yeah i mean like i said i

Always thought everyone i said i don’t regret my try but i regret the the who is the father of the [ __ ] child what kind of thing it was like most of the time i was the main one taking care of our daughter when i when i need to take a breather i

Want to just take a couple hour naps and i said can you get her full just for a couple hours logan and i go to work and then pretty much he said he looked at me and then this and i go laying down in the room take a nap

He’s like what the [ __ ] are you doing huh he said he said members screaming and crying i don’t know what to do i’m like what are you waking me up for i said you got this you’re the dad he said i don’t know what to [ __ ] do

If your ass would have been there for [ __ ] minute one yes would have known what to do you thought i’m sorry was so bored during the labor thing like not the labor part oh [ __ ] i’m about to get blown up um my ass was so boring bored during the

Labor thing like not bored during labor but like the just the time laying there or what she was sleeping and stuff you know yeah i was so bored i literally went through like every single little thing in the packet that they gave us for uh

For the child like when you you have a child born at the hospital they give you packets like coupons and stuff yeah i literally put like diapers and stuff yeah i literally pulled up every single one of them on the tv screen um and looked up what they were and how

Much they were for and what and what you could do with them they literally had [ __ ] coupons for custom pacifiers you could get the baby’s name yeah that’s actually yeah that’s pretty much what i got when i had numbers but yeah but it was like like i said i

Always tell everyone that was logan though i said no i was i this is considered that i was a single mom from from day one since mama was born i was a single mom oh is that what it said on a birth certificate well no decision on the birth

Logan’s not even on the bus how much trees did you get how many trees i don’t know a bunch um let’s see one two three four Four whole stacks and then one two two almost whole stacks because there’s two different types dark oak log dark up log 63 and 60 and then eight things still kind of so like uh six stacks almost but it happened to both but the [ __ ] that probably is they said

If i ever decide to have another kid oh he’s already at the house i’m right here right there right next to you well that they said that if i ever wanted to have another kid they said that the high chance i wouldn’t be able to do the epidural i’m

Like then what the [ __ ] i’m gonna do they said oh well you’re probably gonna have to do all natural oh natural you’re telling me that if i give up to another nine pound baby i’m gonna have to push it out of my snatch okay i’ll be sure the second floor of the boat

Well they said that that there’s a high chance you’re going to have another c-section but the same size as this one basically yeah there’s another floor below this one i don’t need to work well well they said whether it’s a high chance you’re going to have another c-section anyway

Since you had to do it your first time around i’m like that’s pretty cool so and then there’s another floor below that one there’s a whole other floor beneath that one that’s cool and that’s where you’re gonna go in for the air so are you gonna

Put a trapdoor in one of these so that we can breathe water no i’m going to remove the water if you’re going to try to ride a pig i can’t have water in it yeah because it won the pickle dime oh you can’t give me the logs okay give me give me Oh yeah that’s what you think okay hang on i’ll show you why what you think this is what this is what do you knock up this only one of every type of treat that’s perfect i’m not done i’m not done i should have gave it to him one piece at a would time

Been so mad hey you want to see something funny this is what i think of my dad that’s fine i took two and a half hearts off for that he said kiss it so i hit him with an arrow that’s up the arrow in his ass but yeah i mean

Well they told me that i just want to see what you built so play with they told me i have a high chance to have to do another c-section but they say well well we have to this time they said if you have another child we just make an

Appointment for you to have your baby and i tell them you know what i told them i said if you do that make sure it’s on his due date because i want to keep this [ __ ] flowing and they say what do you mean i said i had mailmail on her zach’s due date

I said if you’re gonna take my child out make sure it’s on his due date that’s funny i’ll be like you want that i said yeah that’d be awesome me having two kids in a row you know exactly on their due date hey do you want i’ll take the pumpkin if you

Don’t want it i don’t want it right now or you could just leave it in there i guess um i’m so so this y’all have some more stories man so this right here this little area that’s the consequence of being parents are you gonna put are

You gonna put a cannon here or on the next deck next level up there’s going to be cannons up on the second floor there’s going to be a race section under the bridge and then there’s going to be cannons oh so the second part will go out a little farther

Than right or back it’s going to be on the back there’s going to be cannons on both sides of that deck and then there’s going to be like a deck over here and a deck over here with cannons at the ends like on both sides yeah okay take

Can i make a call right now what okay you you guys want to make a card like well you’re going to get a splint in your foot and then i’m looking down at where’s me like you [ __ ] [ __ ] there’s nothing about it he’s like they’re like well he helped guilty he [ __ ] knows

Pretty much and i’m like you guys are freaking out we got we got so many damn splendors from this [ __ ] it’s okay i did one worse than that i stepped on a tax ship before mm-hmm left down there at my dad’s house man well i did it in an old funky s60s

Trailer and i had to get to i just want to see if this works well i mean the worst thing i ever did like other than my footstool i actually had a nail stuck in my foot wait so if if you put yeah if you put a trapdoor in

In the middle does that make it so that you can breathe underwater how does that work yeah it makes a air block appear you have to make it because it’s it’s it’s a glitch that’s what it is so you actually have to put if he puts him in the middle road too then

That works like he’s got him here on the sides right well he’s draining all that i know but i’m just saying like is that how that works no you got to put it under water oh you got to put it under the water yeah when you put it place it under the

Water it forms a little spot where you can bring it that’s kind of cool you can’t get out there you go to far on your way either to the front stairs or the back that’s fine i was just looking to see what it looked like

I mean you might i gotta fish it like i said i have fish hooks that got stuck on my foot nails [ __ ] glass so i guess you’re gonna have to like put sand in it and pour it out like you did before yeah yeah i gotta do all this [ __ ] the hard way

Let’s grab a bucket over the sides yeah one so kind of oh jesus christ i’m surprised i haven’t broke you yet you twig shut up that is the thing that we usually say on this channel i’ve been saying it’s in my seatbelt thing when i forget to put it on

That’s what those people are like shut your you guys are gonna have a good laugh okay so we went to the car watch oh boy so what happened he’s going through trying to get the extra water off of his in his [ __ ] car and i went punch buggy and he’s like looking around

I mean that’s what that there was a second that came in and went punch buggy he said he looked at me he said that [ __ ] yeah because my ass was digging through the trunk looking for a rag to wipe the car off she was over here yeah in the [ __ ] whole entire time

When i was on the road i’m like i was way i had my fists dug up waiting for the nest punch buggy to come in this is the satan game it definitely runs up a lot of time yeah patience is not a very good virtue of a book yeah

And unless you want to see books doing this [ __ ] you yeah that person something like that that’s funny look oh everyone always told me i’m my wage is so [ __ ] hilarious like i was so pissed that i was all right there was this boss i was playing

On this game i can’t remember what game it was okay i can’t but i can’t well there’s plenty in the house [Laughter] what an [ __ ] no i’m at west house yeah sure no seriously you need to yeah because i’m trying to plant some watermelon yeah so so i’m gonna go okay i’ll i’ll

I’ll get away on that [ __ ] okay can you tear that spot right there for me so i can put a watermelon right there can you suck my imaginary dick yeah let me see i’m pretty sure it’s bigger than yours well i know my bars are bigger than yours yeah right hanging dreams

Actually technically my bars are bigger than yours because you know what you carry yours between your legs and i carry mine on my chest that’s an interesting concept well in that case they can’t suck your balls what the hell look look look there’s a salmon on the boat oh food it’s pretty funny

But yeah i mean my friends always said that they hate well like i was saying earlier i was trying this box i can’t remember what game it was and what happened i can’t i had the worst [ __ ] gaming wage in the world because i was trying to fight this boss

For the past two weeks what are you doing out there don’t worry about him he’s been out there for the last like three days nice he’s stuck there oh cool thing how did a salmon drop a [ __ ] what the [ __ ] is that that’s very cool i oh god

Like you said you got your chinese [ __ ] going on there and sucky sucky alone time horny [Laughter] i don’t know what you’re talking about not enough need for book i’m sorry you said you should be hard put my wine with stagato i’m kidding no she’s not i’m just kidding baby i love you

And that’s the third lie tonight [Laughter] all right i need like five thousand dollars can you hand that over i can transfer it oh you’re so sweet you think i’m kidding no don’t don’t what i don’t want your money i got someone wow that’s the first time

I’ve ever heard a girl say that before i don’t want your money well uh this is no i i i’m not the difference for most girls all right she’s the only girl to ever pay for the first date so yeah that’s crazy means it’s it’s one too far away oh you’re talking

About like the past 50 days i said to 50 dates i don’t know about this okay for the past 25 i’ll go down to 25. it hasn’t been a month yet huh that hasn’t been enough yet maybe like four or five x maybe i’ll go down to 20.

Okay we’ll go with that whatever that’s 40. i go down to 20. that’s my final album like i feel like we’ve been together forever what is forever what is this whatever you speak of grab it i don’t know until her hair’s growing your boobs are saggy i don’t know but

Until until you get to the point where it’s where you’re saying put it away rather if it let me see them that’s like that one joke i told y’all about the husband went to go on their 50th anniversary oh that way yeah i still can’t get over because i’m

Watching a kickstarter video it was a [ __ ] plain kick talk video and there was this guy that that his grandmother in the [ __ ] kitchen okay so he put in fake bar set that was hanging out of his shorts he was doing exercise and his ground wasn’t paying no [ __ ] attention

She finally pay attention she said ah push the damn things away [Laughter] i saw that was pretty funny oh my god my god and then there was even time before but like he he hacked into his grandma’s alexa okay and so that he so that he he trained him

Somehow i don’t remember how it would go that far was her reaction though yeah he uh um it caught a like a [ __ ] and all this [ __ ] i’m like damn it was great it reminds me of the show you saw it’s called the angry green one oh my god

I still can’t get over [ __ ] jackass i i i still i i still give dart in the nickname jackass for a reason that’s funny because the [ __ ] okay the [ __ ] [ __ ] decided to like oh well you know what i’m gonna do the whole notepad you know trick around the

Loop oh how did that work for you oh that’s right you had to went through with like three years of therapy because you shattered your [ __ ] jaw and then you have to do with braces like literally like he like the moped right on top of his jaw shattered the whole entire white side

And that was the most gruesome thing i i personally saw because when that happened his head his [ __ ] cousin just did took out the whole entire freaking moped off of him and in somalia he had to literally like it was so bad it was so badly broken he literally had

To his jaw was like really hanging like this and the only way he could do it was to pull it like this and i’m like like oh and once you break it well yeah he has her yeah his hometown right side is metal and because he had to like have like

Those little wires on his mouth oh that was fun it was like like how i said how are you doing and then and then i made up a joke to him i said that’s the first time i ever seen her [ __ ] shut up for once he said that’s not funny brooke

Oh it talks that’s a joke my dad told me when i was a kid he said china just came out with this new camera and he said so fast they could take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut well but then he got pissed off with me

Because i have one i just did for spike of it so i ate one so i ate some woman noodles and he’s like you’re looking at me he’s like what can i have some i said oh hell no i said we don’t want we don’t want this woman to get between your [ __ ]

Like metal thing because you might they might think it’s a puke [Laughter] said really oh give me uh another like six stacks of those uh white treats to purchase well where so i blended it up or or give me as much as you could possibly get whatever that’s how you’re inventory

I literally like blended in a [ __ ] like blender chopping it all up i said here you go he looks like he said what the [ __ ] is that i said it’s your warming news i’m about to give up i said just just eat it you need to be so sluggish

Like deep down inside i said are again and then after he got the got his braces off and stuff like that he i’m like i asked him i said do you want some ramen noodles he said we’ll see if i can find that he said every time i look at

Woman news not book i think about this time you blended up that [ __ ] [ __ ] and made me eat it [Laughter] and you told me and you told me that was the only food i’m gonna get for the day before i eat it when i got my wisdom teeth all i could

Eat was yoga yeah it was the same well i never had never had that problem i’ve never had my wisdom teeth pulled in there well it’s there with me my wisdom teeth are terrible okay you know how when your wisdom teeth uh grow out they have to go downwards mine is sideways

So the tooth i have like here in the very back it’s because the wisdom tooth is getting so big it’s pushing on the nerves it’s killing the nerve to that tooth so that’s the reason why this tooth is dying pretty much falling apart because because it because it’s destroying my

Nerves and what happened i was supposed to get my wisdom tooth out to that they said they could do it for me even though i was about i think i was about seven months pregnant with melody yeah and they said they could do it without me going under anesthetic the zombie

Was horrible every time they bid me back i would get nauseous and ever since i never went to a dinner since damn it sucks yeah and i still think of the time where mine i i call my brother wolverine for a reason when he was younger one of his uh one of

His molars turned into like a natural canine in the back so he couldn’t even close his mouth this sucks what there was a zombie builder over here and i was gonna try to gear him with the apple but uh when i came back with the apple he was gone

He said he said no thank you i don’t want no fruit i was trying to damage your brains i was trying to cure because that’s a uh one of the trophies well i think you need to hit it with a portion of weakening first then give it yeah you gotta weaken it first

Well i mean i mean when i have it i think it’s gonna be a natural yeah it’s gonna be a notch apple which means it’s gonna be an enchanted apple well when i had my set though well everyone keeps to ask me like did you accept them pearson hood no

No it didn’t when they looked but until it’s just kind of hurting but this is like that this is actually well one of my my friends didn’t believe that i was going out to get my septum peels so we all have that dumbass friend who doesn’t believe you comes up to it

And jumped on it and with the inside of my nose and what happened was i look she looked at me my nose started blending she’s like and i and i and i opened and i look i i looked at her and i removed the bar and

I stepped in and i moved down my nose i’m like hey look i’m leaking i thought it was fake yeah that’s my capture i’m leaking i’m gonna add another deck so i can put cannons in this i told you i was looking at it looking silly woody over there growling he’s growling

He’s mad about something he’s mad at me he’s probably mad because he’s gonna have to like spend another four hours chopping trees for this big ass boat no i’m mad because i wanted the curability but then i couldn’t find my [ __ ] d spawn by the time i went and grabbed me out

An apricot now so nice what they say a day keeps the doctor away send you one shitty doctor oh the golem’s getting hit by something he’s getting his ass beat my [ __ ] uh you [ __ ] oh he ain’t stuck in a [ __ ] boat the [ __ ] um the [ __ ] drown

Was hitting was in the boat hitting him and he couldn’t hit him back i’m about to break the boat or move it how do i just move it the gate’s right there on the other side where right there see the shorter piece of fence all right there yeah

Yeah he was going to destroy all right i was going to put it back he’s going to put it back how nice of you well that’s what i do sometimes oh wait he’s in the boat nice i told you you could go in a boat you

Got to give him iron they call himself about to break i know he was getting his ass beat by drown huh he was getting his ass whooped by a drowning because he couldn’t hit it whatever i’ll give him some iron how much does he need

Uh depends on how damaged he is he looks like he’s just about to break so you gotta give him like a whole block can you give him a block you gotta get you gotta break it in the ingots oh i kind of want to break the boat at this

Point just so he can go down there and fight trams but then he breaks under the water eventually too yeah but you see him actually do something i got a message what do you want there we’ll take one and never go to the stupid table i thought we heard her feelings or something

Sticks and stone may break my bone brothers would never floor yeah right so how much iron does it take again to go in a column um three uh now four whole blocks and then a pumpkin on top that’s why it’s cheaper to fix the ones that you have oh he’s still there cool

Of course he’s still there or if he got hit again he’d be dead repair there so it took three yeah back to four should i break the boat he’s not gonna be able to get up there anyway yeah but at least he can do something he

Can live his life and go fight something like what his imaginary friend otherwise he’s stuck in the books oh [ __ ] i didn’t mean to do that he’s gonna hit you how do i just hit the boat [ __ ] that’s funny it won’t let me that’s because the golems now pissed at

You of course it won’t let you i thought you bud i got him you want to hit me hit me no you can fix them yeah oh well that’s one hell of a defense imagine riding a little baby with that [ __ ] behind you that’s right

Three i can’t ride in a bigger boat just take a whole bunch of them this whole thing is [ __ ] what you know how many goblins i got now like one are you going to run the roof across there what are you doing get down oh so here let me

Shut your horns you search your hormones you shut your hormones they’re all so nice to each other you guys are just having [ __ ] over here so cute he’s like he’ll say something smart and then he’ll punch him and then and like [ __ ] probably didn’t deserve that as usually he does easily yeah usually

One or the other deserves that well it was funny though me and myself well what happened was i got drunk with one of my friends and of course she had to do like she had to make a quiet time she said it’s the boot fit

And i’m like you say that to me again and she said if the boot bit exactly and then always suddenly i’m like all right you asked me so i put my sleeve up and i have my fist start grabbing me it was just like 65 it’s english [ __ ] hilarious everyone was

Like rolling like oh god did you look at them funny no i just ran past it oh that boat looks pretty dope he’s still working on the second floor yeah this is going to be a there’s going to be another floor on top of this one

And then that floor is going to be full of cannons Just curve the top deck that’s what i said i’ll just hide it once i get past this point here i’m going to curve it down man they’re taking me forever five treaties are clear I’m just gonna go across that’s just fun i gotta go all the way over here and find trees now that’s gonna be one block lower in the middle and then go back up well that’s a perfect example but exactly that’s my point well [ __ ] i gotta go on a three-day hike that’s my

Entry you love it you know they’re dynamic damn trees well he was gonna build a couple of them but i think he’s just gonna stick with this he’s like i didn’t realize Higher so i can clear the top of the tree because if you leave a wood block in it it’ll make the tree float and it doesn’t disappear And you don’t like it you’re like don’t leave floating please because it makes lag yeah and the video goes look at all these clouds i’m trying to build we don’t like green clouds come on now [Laughter] there’s like one time when i made them a giant dick with some some wood blocks

I took two balls put one here one there and then i built it straight up and then at the top i put a giant head on and i made him chop it down Because he wasn’t whining about even even one block in one tree blocks that he was whining about oh yeah so then i [ __ ] made him a dick out of wood yeah it’s so much better oh that’s that’s funny Yeah i forgot you said something for me about it I wondered why you put it there i’m like why is there a penis over here except i don’t know but i said i don’t know but it’s gonna die i think he blew the creeper next to it and he blew it up i said yeah i blew the balls right off

The bottom of it that’s like that elephant i made when i was in school remember yeah yeah elephant uh-huh it was a it was a penis it was a [ __ ] pinocchio dick face cup we’ll have to find it sometime over at my dad’s house because it’s still there

Somewhere all right it should be in the kitchen on that window just got balling that’s fine i’m going to find show it to the next oh where is that the frame you can still tell it was a dick it was just a [ __ ] dick face i had veins going through it

And it was then they had curved very distinct bull sacks on the face and my teacher was like that’s really cool and then she realized what it was like but i’m sorry to tell you this but you’re gonna have to change it into something more appropriate

It’s like i can’t put that in the art show like that like but it’s erotic and then she got mad she got mad told me how to change it i was like fine [ __ ] i’ll curve it up a little bit and i’ll turn it into an elephant

And you should have seen the dick there it was [ __ ] funny all the girls in the class were trying to play with it and we were seniors in high school the [ __ ] is the cow doing in here or maybe i was no jenna where’s your dad’s like he’s got it sitting on

The most opportune spot in the whole house right there in front of the window he said for come on get some that’s right okay i got two more uh just like that elephant i made one you would never believe that i made that elephant when i was in like kindergarten

Or first grade or something well but no no no not the elephant but the um the horse one one i think it’s foreign oh that’s why i’ve seen it it actually looks like a horse and it was really cool it had a top part too

Like it used to have a lid you could tell the top yeah i was a very sick and doing kid in park in my art class i definitely slept around i think we all did and what the hell is with the science teacher miss kemper she was almost my age uh i remember

It was the science teacher i had was mrs uh temper no i know there was just kids we had miss beers and and you know how that kind of hurts so much that i could play with that miss beers yeah we [ __ ] her and then there was miss green who’s

Married to mark green the weatherman um and we used to call her by whatever color shirt she was wearing that day so if she would wear a pink shirt it was miss pink and she was wearing a green green she’s wearing brown skirts like what’s up miss brown

I bet we have probably made her have to go to the store and buy more green clothes yeah that’s funny Oh it’s already doing better this stream it’s made it faster her name was like michelle something michelle who was it one of the science teachers michelle she was only there for like two years oh yeah i might have been chased off by our class let’s just say we were heathens oh

Yeah for sure she would always go on this website she’d go on this website and she printed out like a little course for us to do and then she would forget to mark out the website barcode at the bottom of the page so we just go get a log into the website and

Uh and get all the answers and fill it out and be throwing it out right off the bat for the answer oh that’s fine she didn’t know that that’s what he was doing what matters he didn’t care [ __ ] you i got [ __ ] to do bro and then there was that’s not stopping

Him he hit you twice her husband worked at gamestop Come on in here i’ll kill you under the roof come on come on i cannot remember but i was homeschooled so i had to do my whole year there so i was 21 so i could pretty much go with any other teachers if i wanted to when she was like

You’re blown up by a creeper if you’re gonna find a fresh death hole over there murder hole i’m gonna go find this stuff It should be over i didn’t really have anything 12 on this map yeah new record one more and i’m done where were you this thing’s starting to look pretty cool oh mix it in different colored wood so um all right so yeah i remember what it was

That we did i made a science teacher man we had this lab and we’re supposed to be like heating up bunsen burners i i put a thermometer on it and blew it and glued the cap across the room i put ink panel and melted it to the top

Well i didn’t do well other than breaking the thermometer i didn’t do anything that would permanently damage the bunsen burner it just melted it melted For breaking one of them and and i knew exactly where those ancient ash burners came from they came out of the ancients fallout shelter that’s under the school that’s funny what was it that i didn’t did you find your stuff no not yet it’s got to be right here somewhere

It should be a murder hole somewhere i think it was a little bit fun this should be by where the trees are still despawning well that’s weird i don’t know where it is it was like right here it was like right here go check in that hold it

There’s even a tree that i started jumping down it hadn’t been right uh all the other stuff looted your [ __ ] my balloon is see a one there and that was the tree that you were cutting that girls like right here somewhere i’ll go go try to get up iron

If it’s not on that side then you must have been somewhere else there’s another murder hole that doesn’t make any sense wait turn no turn around that way oh that’s right i thought i saw something floating over all right sorry folks we’re looking at the ceiling I wasn’t looking at you i was looking at my own [ __ ] no he’s talking back either that you’re experiencing another one of those weird glitch things where your shit’s really there but you can’t see it i’m pretty sure i could see your name tag from where i was in the boat well here’s

One explosion that’s a couple of trees well i don’t even see where you were killed there’s no damage to the ground over here right there no that was from him trying to get the tree up there i think it was back at the hole that i was just

Cleaning out and the only thing left was some dirt oh well so it despawned no something they took all this [ __ ] remember mob lives on if you don’t give back in a certain amount of watermelons the other person is in the load window the zombies will take all the [ __ ] i found it

Hey you weren’t even over when you thought you were yeah i was i was just a little bit more correct keep going i don’t know that’s pretty much all of them Shield i guess okay this will be a permanent edition over here this is this is will [ __ ] sign you there we go that looks pretty good bam too bad the ass is one too far over That’s great he’s even taken a time to fix it there we go oh you want to see child hang on let me see i think that might be enough to wrap that word in cobblestone really magical um flexible word yes down pronoun adverb and hey i need the microphone i got it Oh Foreign foreign [ __ ] the [ __ ] [ __ ] that’s a lot of fun go outside and play hide and go [ __ ] yourself that’s my favorite it’s like dismissive bullfuck yeah please be bigger that’s my line i stole it yeah one day he got mad he’s like that’s for [ __ ]

And ever since then i started saying it that’s great so i’m gonna have to remember that one of them people that probably used to play the diner dash game huh you ever play the dino dash game yes oh i probably get food on the go And that’s the one where you get food eat it all and then run out real fast well it’s the one where you’re a waitress and you gotta serve the customer sometime try to earn money for the restaurant Then you gotta figure out where to spend the next let me tell you a good investment people wait wrong I’m making some diamond armor And then they’re looking to blow up all day and they can’t hurt [ __ ] i can’t believe he’s actually just expanded out it doesn’t have to line up [ __ ] them too Doing nothing to stop his ass they’re just [ __ ] guilty To ram a missile up his ass then the whole world would be a better place why so he could still run his country Sex is the best thing to wake up to in the morning oh unless you’re in prison I was like i think i was like oh man i think once you hit like teenagers that’s when [ __ ] like that becomes horrible you want a piece of me zombie you want some of this that’s funny i said you want a piece of me zombie and pulled up my sword and then he

Decided he was gonna turn around he’s like oh [ __ ] he’s like oh crap he pulled out a samurai sword so he’s gonna tuck me up into little pieces oh yeah you know the tree gone let’s see how much one do i play that’s pretty good he only got blown up once let’s see

I got one more one more accident the villagers don’t sit there by your cookies hey don’t forget i still got all the planks for your uh for your deck oh hi and welcome to denzel can you hear me i’ve got a bunch of planks nice to talk about someone named dude

Go grab them if you’re making a boat you can use no i want to highlight that message i want to see what he said he said something german with ukraine or something or something it won’t let me copy it uh and so he said something else

What did he say i don’t know it’s in russian are you crazy well that says that definitely says ukraine at the the second one let me go eat look well yeah but it would be nice to actually be able to go there i think i might leave the uh i’m gonna see

The gates off of the cargo hatches so when i jump off the crow’s nest and stuff while i’m building i don’t die that’s why i wanted so many different types of wood so i oh it says go ukraine nice all right i i’m sorry yes this stupid thing wouldn’t let me copy that

That’s amazing that’s good enough nice i’m sure they’re like what i put up the hill and they’re still putting up their own oh i gotta go get me some more cobblestone she’s trying to keep personal information to himself taylor i all right i’ll have to swim really what the heck I just realized i was playing yeah turn that point [ __ ] off i know like you have to expect that’s funny i like the [ __ ] sign next one that’s great wait a minute i’m not done with it yet i’m gonna wrap it in ukrainian colors nice he’s like i’m just gonna keep pushing

Welcome welcome hey they said i could they just don’t the crazy thing is they said don’t say anything about uh pro russian anything you know it’s just like okay that’s doable yeah that happened yeah funny i i don’t like what russia is doing right now why the [ __ ] are they in that country

Is there but you really don’t yeah i didn’t say nothing don’t know what to talk about how’s your inventory very full right now uh why you got all those hats left because i made them from one of them type the second thing you put in chat

The third thing you put in chat and the fourth thing you put in chat so that i can copy and paste this over to translate i’m gonna give this to you so you can use the finish yep just repost it there you go put them put them in the chest that’s up there

Because i’m not in this [ __ ] right now i’m over here trying to figure out what to do next okay well i guess i’ll jump all this wood yeah i left the way in eventually there’s going to be a ramp leading across from the wooden dock and getting [ __ ] on both sides

I don’t know what else he said here i got five and a half attacks or five and that’s one down 520 and then i got all these first wood slabs one two three four five you need to put blue and yellow flowers around the side there you go that should help you a

Little what do you think is that good oh [ __ ] yeah okay okay now i’m gonna go to this house over here save and click go downstairs Okay i’ll wait till he’s finished and then i’ll cut the feet i have no clue what he said you’re gonna have to go to the house and go look up what you said all right don’t put that there we’re probably gonna this will probably be it for this evening anyway 1202. oh

I want to go and vote it’s Oh Is Is Oh [Applause] [Applause]

This video, titled ‘Survival Minecraft Pro Ukraine Mar 14th Twitch stream.’, was uploaded by Chris Taylor BatGuanno on 2022-03-14 04:36:46. It has garnered 1 views and 0 likes. The duration of the video is 01:51:58 or 6718 seconds.

Survival Minecraft Pro Ukraine Mar 14th stream.

Donation: (https://streamlabscharity.com/@batguanno/ukraine) Watch live at https://www.twitch.tv/batguanno

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Chris Taylor BatGuanno – Survival Minecraft Pro Ukraine Mar 14th Twitch stream.