I Spoke To Dream’s Mom

Hello hello hello hello hello i spoke to dreams mum you know dream yeah his mother first i got in a call with dream and acted like an idiot because you know it’s just funny too you know also me and my editor spent actual days on this video so if you want to

Help out the channel by doing almost nothing please check to see if you subscribed it’s free you can unsubscribe later and if you enjoy the video subscribing helps me out just so much anyway i got in a call with dream why why is he just following me around

You’re just giving me a netherright axe thank you nice guy there’s so much to do today there’s so much to do hello big d hi you should stop calling me that why because it makes me uncomfortable and i have expressed that tommy i’m sorry small d don’t call me that no

D money there you go that’s good okay d money look at me don’t i look [ __ ] cool right now can i have my axe back yes you look cool yeah but i’m gonna look significantly less cool if i give you your axe back i mean

I mean at the end of the day you can just stab the show at me if you need it so dream i heard i heard you going in for a ten thousand dollar 1v1 soon yeah you excited i am wait no a hundred thousand dollar right jeez you know you’re going up against

Technoblade he’s he’s better than you probably he’s not better than me he’s probably better than you actually he’s probably better he’s probably better yeah hooties 19 is being spread by big q so what is cootie’s dream hoodies it’s like it’s girls have them what oh yeah girls have cooties i’m not even kidding

What what is it though what is it is it a word for a downstairs part no it’s like being if you have cooties you’re just like i don’t like you and so the the girls say boys have cooties and the girls say boys the girls say boys incredibly sexist no

Because we like the girls say boys have cooties too like i could say you have cooties i don’t have cuties well you do you do i say you do if you if you wanna oh okay have you ever actually had cooties it’s it’s not a real thing

It’s just something you say to someone who’s obnoxious you’re just like you have cooties you think i’m like not what’s obnoxious about me is it because i always win wars yeah that’s exactly why now since you’re here i’m thinking we could do some holy land work if you’d like would you like that

Dream i don’t do work what do you do then nothing what do you what what do you do all day i kill people oh you mean you mean yeah yeah what is it you do what was your what’s your morning routine i wake up

Do tax fraud and then i go to sleep why did you say you kill people for like like a minute and then use oh because that’s in minecraft have you ever killed anyone in real life no you hesitated they’re a bit big man i i did not

Hesitate a little bit there i didn’t hesitate i didn’t hesitate anyone got a sil touch pick axe spare it’s for the god dude we’re gonna have to do so much work on these furnaces if we can’t get a silk touch pickaxe how come whenever i’m

In a call with you my whole chat goes call him clay i don’t know because they’re weirdos they’re like i can’t call him clay call him by his real name it’s it’ll be so funny his real name and nobody will sound like right now what did your mother call you did she go

Okay okay how many views and subscribers have you got today clay go oh mother a mother more than yesterday mother and she goes okay okay not good enough i feel like i’m not normally called clay so they think it’s like weird way what did they call you then why what your family

Calls you clay yes my family calls me sir your family calls you child no they don’t why stupid [ __ ] things like come here child why why why would you say that i’m inferring does your mum go oh adult oh adults come hither i’m in between because i’m cool because

My name’s dream and i subscribers it’s not true is that true who is this [ __ ] this guy i’m gonna kill him with your axe i’m gonna kill him before you get to kill him ah you’re cool aren’t you you’re real you’re god you’re actually um a [ __ ] wait would you say

I’m obnoxious abanoxia you know it’s obnoxious obnoxious it’s obvious it’s obnoxious you said it would you know hey dream what grade did you get in english what grade would you say i’m obnoxious i’d say uh why stop beating me just answer the stop questions if you continue meeting me with no

Longer answer any questions am i obnoxious am i obnoxious get away from me then what are the symptoms of cooties how do you treat it by spankings like for a child well what it’s a dream you know how you were calling me a child a minute ago

I’m going to infer this i’m going to prefer this actually i said now tell me i’m a man you are a man child i mean yeah you’re a child jesus that that what is it what is a man child it’s like a mix like you act like a child but you’re a man

Well why can’t i just be a man then because you act like a child name one time i’ve ever acted like a child 10 seconds ago what did i do you were trying to make me look bad did it make you feel upset did you cry

You cried didn’t you you cried you cried you’re right there’s one tear one’s here you cried look me in the eyes look at me you literally i have to look at your nipples take off your chest plate that you’re so weird oh you literally have a great green

Face you said no nipples i wouldn’t even mean eyes i have to look at your chest eyes take off your shirt please no what tommy you’re feeling so weird right now i’m just listen listen i’m just i’m just being polite about your condition for the fact that your eyes

Are in the center of your chest so either either you have no eyes or you have no nipples there is no well i don’t know i don’t know i’m just a show you want to look at my nipples you make that jump tommy it’s like such an amazing jump from there to here

You still that’s not fair look at me go oh that was good that was good oh yeah yeah it’s so good hey can you not steal my xp guy whatever you say guy why did you just call me guy because you called me guy are you a guy not your guy pal

Okay okay buddy that’s your buddy guy now listen here mate i ain’t no [ __ ] [ __ ] anyone who got silk touch pickaxe there’s like one person on if you ask the same question ten times and there’s only two other pieces i just made it first try tommy you know

You’re the you know you’re the world record speedrunner and i’m not so does your mother go oh clay oh clay reminder i’m disappointed in you my mother never says that my mother goes reminder i’m so proud of you why you sad can you not handle words big man

Dream i’m sorry for saying you’re i don’t really think your mother’s disappointed with you yay you’re a bit of a man-child you’re a man-child you’re just sulked until i lied to you you went you went you meant it you meant it why did you say that to me

Oh it’s okay you’re like what you can’t stop me stop it please stop it i didn’t mean it kill you with the shovel wow what is that going to make you feel better about your life no i’m not going to get silk to cheer this isn’t even worth it the odds are

That i don’t we don’t even have lapis come on big man we do have lapis oh did we we’re here oh i didn’t see that chest that’s not my phone right i’ll get i’ll enchant it now good luck i got efficiency too that’s all right

Do you feel better than me when you run quicker than me yes okay well i want to remind you you’re not better than me i’m definitely better than you how are you better than me tell me how all right let’s get to two minutes until dream brings you subscriber count three two one

I’m better than you i’m beating you in every duel at one point i’m better at youtube than you obviously that’s not true why is that not true it’s just not well i’ve got any evidence i have more subscribers how what was the time on that what was the time on that

I went on mutant said two minutes until dream brings up subscriber count and then you you baited me into it that’s not my fault you you said that can we get some loathe in the chat a classic lull lulls in this chat are you rapping rap for me dream please i’m not rapping

Rap who’s your favorite rapper um tubber what have you heard him he’s insane i haven’t heard him rap you have to hear him what i was whack me i can’t it’s inappropriate oh oh guys don’t spam his chat with that that’s inappropriate that’s funny just funny they’re all

Gonna go he’s a minor stop it but right now i’m literally a miner like look at me like minecraft Question for your dream why did you just do that when you thought here’s a funny thing i can do and you just went yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah what what what about you is like yeah yeah this will be funny because i’ve realized actually after speaking to

You you’re not very funny i’m actually very funny tell me all about you ready [Laughter] [Applause] not even remotely close to just a dream you’re funny you literally just dream you just took off your shirt have you ever taken an iq test my iq is 292. really my iq is 293. that’s so funny really yeah yeah you really [ __ ] suck it probably goes up the

More things i say the higher it goes that’s how it works i would i will say that ever since i’ve been around you my iq is probably lowered i look a little bit dumber but you look dumber how does someone look dumb i’ll show you a screenshot you’re

Going to send me a photo of me aren’t you no no i’m not you you you [ __ ] really big man it’s not even remotely funny balls in the chat laws on the show no no lulls actually what is funny about mocking another person i don’t mock people

I accept people for who they are i go i go i accept you for really being really annoying i’m literally building a tower in the holy land and you’re like oh you know it’ll be funny i’ll just punch him off the [ __ ] yeah you’re lagging out my g you’re

Lagging out the server dream because your presence is making the service shittier hey hey question for you if you lose the 1v1 can you um can you make can you give me admit can you give can you make me the owner of the server no can you transfer ownership why

Everyone would agree that the server would be better but it’s basically my server anyway that’s not true how is it your server ban me right now you couldn’t even ban me right you [ __ ] kicked me you’re an idiot dream Okay please can you unban me hey so the command for you mr server is slash pardon space tommy in it you just asked the chat is tommy okay okay you could have told me you just stopped doing the water is your mother proud of you dream i’m sure

Do you know though she ever said it to your face she ever gone clay what’s your last name what’s your what’s your what’s your credit card number bacon for break guys you need to eat bacon tomorrow for breakfast please agree to the agreement that way you you

Have to eat a sock i’ll be i’ll be i’m not really i’m just not sure it’s funny though it is funny how much money would you give me for hitting mlg no because it’s an easy thing to do how much no no how much how much i want you to eat your sock

Okay you’re like okay i’m team techno that’s gonna be wrong for the out of context account i’m no i’m telling you i’m team techno’s cooler than you tommy come on you don’t have to lie is so cool okay how give me give me an example and don’t

Don’t say anything about his dance moves or his his elbow i didn’t even know he could dance give me once give me an example don’t mention his album oh my god techno candy i wasn’t gonna mention his elbow dream all right then what are you gonna mention he could dance

You were telling me the other day that you’re neutral and then i know i mean no i am neutral but then you kept going eat a sock tommy in it eat a sock oh please please i’ll eat a sock please i thought about it and i thought who have i known

For longer techno who’s been meaner to me you i just think it’s quite look at me he can’t hold me at gunpoint what the [ __ ] i’ve never seen someone so passionate about trying to make another manny a sock let’s go get some oat wood or what perhaps this would look better with

Spruce i think it would hey what’s your favorite wood in minecraft probably dark oak a lot of respect for that dream that respect yeah you know i’ll try and work out through who i who i think is better you are techno so you’re you’re a dark oak man yeah that’s good

That’s good opinions on oak i’d say oak is top tier but it’s not like yes agreed holy [ __ ] i think oak’s the best words just everyone’s [ __ ] absurd who’s your favorite woman what it’s an easy question i don’t have a favorite woman who who is the who do you hate the most

In the world i’m interviewing you dream who do i hate the most in the world yeah Why is he gonna mute why did you go on mute dream did you did mother dream come in i was coughing can i say hello to mother dream yes really if you want to one second i’ll i’ll one second if swear to god if he uses a voice

Changer right now my rating is going to go down so low hello hello hello hello hello hello hello who who is this this is dream’s mom really yes who’s this this is george not found i’m a good friend of dreams no sorry this is this is tommy in it

How how are you child you’re a child i’m not why would you why would you do you mind me swearing mrs dream or i don’t like swearing but it’s up to you okay i won’t swear then dream why the why the freak would you say that i’m not a child please

So wait nice wait are you thank you thank you are you disappointed in dream was that really your mother yeah she happened to be over and i just knew she was over so i was like oh yeah heck i just i just spoke to your mother

I was just not expecting i think you’d be funny and then you weren’t funny like i’m actually disappointed to be honest that was funny i just don’t think your mum would have found it funny the first thing you did was introduce me as a child and i was my instinct is to

Just start shouting sweat at you you could swear i don’t know sorry i was about to swear but you could dream i don’t want a bad first impression with with mrs dream that’s the last thing i want in the world i’m going to be i genuinely thought it was going to be a

Voice changer you really caught me off guard there you weren’t funny i’m actually so mad i thought you were going to come in and then like she’d be mad or something it’d be funny i’m not gonna i’m not gonna swear at your mother though that that would just feel that

Would i mean that would even cross my line does your mother go oh clay time for supper big man do you go yes sometime she goes okay time for super big man do you have any siblings dream yes my sister is here right now actually that’s why that’s why i think she might

Be she might be watching the stream i have no idea how was your sister 13 i think i’m not sure i could mentally handle speaking to another one of the dream family you’ve really you’ve really mentally punched me in the face well does your sister watch your videos yeah

That’s your sister watch my videos she did mention you the other day what did she say she said you’re really really funny i mean she said she hates you she said you suck wait did you really say i’m funny she did actually it was yesterday you know when you go hey

Did you find that funny as well of course of course i’m hilarious no i’m i’m actually a lonely child no i’m wait no no wait wait no i’m an only child not a lonely child oh so the same thing dream i have so many friends you have no friends

Fast chat [ __ ] you have one friend what about erin we don’t talk about him you know jack manifold yeah you know wilbur yes yeah those are my friends that’s true and you know what i’m your friend and therefore you have more friends okay well it kind of feels like you you

Swapped up on me you know i was making a joke you’re one of my best friends tommy i’d say and you’re my you’re my top 10 best friends tommy who’s your number one best friend oh there’s lists not in any particular order this is sound apple george’s dream is it sam napo george

They’re obviously tired oh wow bad boy halos and they’re tied too if i had to rank them maybe i’d rank them by the time i’ve known them and therefore it’d go sap nap bad george but that’s like not a particular oh you heard it here folks which one is it

I do to go to go up so it has nothing to do with that puns lies to us we kill him yeah all right can i read my donations in your presence because i’ve not read any of them uh jinxed with two months thanks jinx you’re thanking my my donators

Yeah i a dream what oh no tell me it won’t die tell me it won’t Die you’re going to be so mad tommy why something’s happened out dead oh what the [ __ ] why he’s such a get off the holy land oh wait wait wait wait wait wait go general go general nikki yes he’s on you can get your apology i know

But i’m not going to beg for his apology oh i’ll beg don’t you worry tommy hey you listen to me you killed her [ __ ] you need to apologize right now big man why you’d say right dip [ __ ] i’m not apologize to nicki for killing her fox

Nicki i’m sorry for killing your fox but tommy you’re not on the holy lands right now i literally am yeah he just shot me you are banished you’re banished in these lands you’re mine dream dream tell him he’s not allowed on the holy land no more he just shot me

He just broke out loud he just can’t he just can’t wait he just shot him he didn’t know but no he knows all right tommy i hope you never come kill me come here i’m literally here look at me stop talking you’re an idiot okay kill me then you just killed me on

The holy land if that’s going to make you sleep better at night big man i will oh i just want this to be a lesson don’t you ever hurt back don’t you ever take that dream you’re ready you’re ready i’ve lost my chest plate actually they’ve stolen my items from the holy land

I have it oh thanksgiving more like dream he’s nice thank you tommy you’re welcome no no redemption no you know i thought you were you were mediocre and then you know i’ve had to compare you to these buffoons and now now i know dream you know you’re not

You’re not you ain’t half bad hey stand up what’s your favorite type of minecraft uh log um either dark oak or spruce which one dark oak there we go there we go nicki nicki what’s your favorite type of log um i’d say it’s oak good oh it’s good what’s number two really dark

Oh my god okay i have a question for you nikki i’m fighting technoblade for a hundred thousand dollars tomorrow who’s gonna win oh techno is my friend ted no no oh my god oh my god nicki i mean you didn’t i mean you could have said that politely oh my god

You could have said that nicer huh oh my god