I Survived 100 Days of REAL LAWS in Minecraft

Do you like playing minecraft then you’re a filthy criminal drop the weapon you’re under arrest let me read you the charges for starters burglary kidnapping hunting an endangered species and indecent exposure but you’re not alone so for the next 100 days i’ll be put on probation to survive real world laws in

Minecraft and either gain my freedom or be sentenced to death so nothing about this challenge is going to be easy or free including getting wood because legally i can’t just go punching down trees in the forest unless i go to the bureau of land management’s website and actually buy a permit

Which i did but now i have an even bigger issue see this sheep looks tasty but without a hunting license it’s totally illegal actually let me double check hi my name is branzy i was just wondering if i would need a license to hunt wild sheep in minecraft is that a serious question

Maybe so i don’t think i’m getting a hunting license but since it is legal to forage for food i picked up some melons and some zombie flesh but now i can start construction on my new favorite starter base it’s a chest boat it’s compact safe and can hold a boatload of treasure

But speaking of treasure there’s a shipwreck now legally shipwrecks get a little dicey because anything within three miles of the u.s coast is technically property of the government but that looks close enough i mean far enough and on day three i found the most valuable treasure of all oh look at that

There’s a pillager outpost respecting the boundary of the property there’s an empty cage oh there’s an alala hello there’s another one a lala too come here you guys are just like wanda and cosmo but with less hair there’s two of them in that little cage well i mean they are cute but

Technically breaking the cage would be vandalism so no now being on probation also meant that i couldn’t legally possess any weapons but on day four i had an idea okay i wonder if i give wanda a sword if she’ll behave like a fox and just start stabbing my

Enemies there’s only one way to find out go wanda go fight for my honor or you know don’t this is all in self-defense okay i don’t want any trouble everybody just back away on day five i sheared a sheep made a bed and found a village but approaching a

Village legally is a little bit different than in regular minecraft because i can’t take their crops that would be theft i can’t go in their houses or that would be breaking and entering and in order to build a house legally the first thing you need is to

Buy land but to buy anything in minecraft you need emeralds so on day six i devised a complex algorithm to determine the exact real world value of one minecraft emerald but where did i put it oh here it is on the back of the subscribe button alright that’s some expensive bread but

Since the average residential lot in the united states costs about 85 000 that means that for only 1.2 emeralds this entire chunk is mine so where do i pay i guess the well is kind of the only real city building so welcome to wells largo keep the change i guess but building a

House means buying a building permit which would just be ridiculous to buy in real life for a silly minecraft video it cost me 50 i really don’t get how mr beast does this but from now on for legal purposes we have to call it a shed not a house

And on day 8 i sculpted the most beautiful shed in minecraft history on day 9 i got a job hello mr farmer boss man sir i’m an ex-convict and i was hoping that you had some kind of job available great i’ll start monday morning on day

10 i decided to dress for the occasion and on day 11 my parole officer stopped by for a visit wow look at you and your uniform oh my gosh convict how you doing is this your residence this is my residence yes i live here i have all the building permits what is that

Oh god uh oh it’s got a weapon man what a delinquent how dare they just just hold it just hold that don’t no no just hold the weapon what is this what is this nothing well you’ll be happy to know that i am employed well

Yeah what do you do for a living mike i’m a farmer uh crops this is what i specialize i specialize in oh so what do you do we sell one salad a year it’s a simple life the life of an ex-con oh skeleton you wanna are you gonna do anything

About that there’s a hostile person right there aren’t you supposed to be the law and go like arrest them yeah dude okay don’t hurt anybody skeleton so uh it’s gonna be a long night in conclusion today i’ve written down a lot of things and you’re probably going back to jail goodbye what

Like like now nope when you’re 100 days are up oh i’ll prove you wrong and i’d better do it soon or my trial wouldn’t end well so on day 11 i finally decided to make some armor unfortunately when you’re on probation body armor is you guessed it

Illegal so on day 12 i made a safety moat gary stay out of the mo please on day 13 i made a shield i believe they call this a legal loophole day 15 i made a mine shaft day 16 i realized it was sort of a waste of time wow that’s the

Whole chunk huh huh on day 17 i caught a frog on day 18 i found diamonds kind of no it’s on the other side of the chuck border on day 19 i became the town hero you’re saved citizens be free yeah uh you’re welcome then on day 23 i

Made some minor improvements to the shed so my shed which is definitely still a shed is now the biggest building in the entire village but it’s not a house it’s a shed with a greenhouse with no windows who are you the city inspector gary get

Out of the moat on day 24 i gave the shed some finishing touches on day 26 i got my first paycheck wow what a grip off thank you on day 27 i bought two additional chunks and paid property taxes and on day 30 i found a friend in

Desperate need hey gary you look like you could really use some hell bud i hope someone does before you burn alive or undead okay fine i’ll help him so on day 31 i started a rescue party i’m 73 sure going into another dimension violates my probation oh wait risking my own life by

Going into the fortress would be trespassing sorry gary but there’s no way around that right public necessity legally a person may trespass in an emergency situation god dang it oh gary you’re gonna be the death of me oh my gosh on day 35 i brewed weakness

Potions this was so much work for such a silly bit and on day 36 i saved a life and then boom oh yeah i forgot it’s not like an instant thing so on day 37 i gave gary a place to stay now for the record you can

Leave any time you want this isn’t like a hostage situation but uh seriously don’t ever leave the yard or you’ll probably die because the village was being sieged on a nightly basis so on day 39 i came up with a solution now in order to protect the

Town i’ve decided to build a wall around the entire thing but legally that means i’ll have to buy every chunk surrounding the village i am going to have to get a second job for this and on day 40 that’s exactly what i did perfect i’ll get right to work on day 41

I expanded my produce production and at this point the money was just rolling in but on day 45 i realized it wasn’t rolling fast enough oh not this again come on bossman sir get over here i’ll save you oh poor bossman sir he was like a very distant fifth cousin twice removed on

The side of the family that i never speak to anymore for moral reasons to me which means that i was his next of kin so legally i just inherited his lands and businesses which saves me a whole 22 dollars on a business registration fee

Yes i mean how very sad of a time this is for all of us so on day 46 i hired a replacement family member welcome to the family now get to work and also realize that by law animals must be killed humanely i’m still not technically

Allowed to hold any weapons but i think i have an idea on day 49 i implemented my humane solution so hypothermia is basically just like falling asleep but with cold toes or so i’m told in the arms see totally humane then on day 50 i finally saved enough

Emeralds to save the entire town and by day 52 the city was finally saved alright nothing’s getting in here now or out is it just me or does it kind of look like a prison yard definitely not everything was going perfectly that is until i caught the entire town in the

Middle of a game of whose hickey is it public indecency you’re all guilty all of you what has become of this town we were a law-abiding place and now you’ve turned it into some kind of kissing party and on day 55 they left me with no choice this is a citizen’s arrest all

Prisoners are to remain in their cells until someone with actual legal authority arrives please on day 57 i implemented a strict uniform policy on day 59 i gave the prisoners yard time now remember yard time is a privilege not a right gary on day 62 i added watchtowers to

Keep watch over my criminals yeah i’m still getting prison vibes for some reason but on day 63 i had a much more notorious criminal on my mind my parole officer this is a beautiful home yeah did you did you make this did you just trespass i’m the law i

Couldn’t stand to stand beside a man who didn’t stand for what he was supposed to stand for so on day 64 i made a very special holding cell just for him so when the parole officer gets here all he has to do is simply open this chest and

Boom he’s falling straight down into a trap i know gary i know but uh now i have to fix it again god dang it and on day 66 it was time to put my plan into action all right wow we really just kind of pop in

Look what’s going on over here i’ve been trying to be the most law-abiding citizen i possibly can by imprisoning the whole village yeah you’re like the warden now right i mean like who’s your boss is it me am i the boss is it no you’re not the boss the warden isn’t in charge

Of the parole officer that’s ridiculous all right well that makes a lot of sense but still place is looking good thanks thanks i also have a mythical table i don’t think dark magic is against the law i mean i’m gonna write this down why do we have to write things down i

Really don’t understand records have to be kept do they do they have to be kept i don’t understand Um uh note to self just do a motion cap of the parole officer falling into the hole instead of myself this is a huge strike against you you know it’s not that i was thinking to trap you i wanted to merely advise you uh to get in the

Hole or i will murder you right now all right fine now you stay nice and cozy down there probably never ever i don’t know i haven’t decided it’ll be between me and the judge what we decide to do with you but looking down at his guilty little face i realized that just arresting

Criminals wasn’t enough i needed to help them see the error of their ways so on day 67 i started a rehabilitation program there’s one right there hello hello okay that’s more that’s that’s more than i was expecting welcome to prison processing please be sure to wear

Your name badges at all times on day 68 i built the rehab center on day 70 we had a small hr incident you killed bob i would absolutely arrest you for that but you’re kind of already in prison and by day 73 it was time to show the prisoners the power of

Rehabilitation gary please run towards friendship not away from it and just as i thought i was finally conquering crime on day 75 i found it again in the least likely place hey cuz just want to let you know i gave the lalas some carrots to help you out around here so just let

Me know glittering litter bug how could they have done this i had put my faith my trust my carrots into these little creatures and they didn’t even have the decency to throw it all away in a proper bin i never wanted it to come to this but you forced my hand and with

That the city my city was finally crime free but as i looked around at all my accomplishments i couldn’t help but think i’m bored i mean i was alone rich feared ah that’s keeping you on your toes joel i had nothing left to gain or accomplish i

Had no purpose i guess you could say that lawful really is just awful with a big fat l but i followed the laws i obeyed all the rules i couldn’t be the bad guy too i was utterly confused so on day 77 i did some inner reflecting while

Building a statue in honor of myself it’s me putting my foot down on crime get it but on day 78 the smallest something or someone changed everything oh my god a prison baby look at his little jumpsuit and if something this innocent that will inevitably grow up to

Be a convicted felon could come from a place like this then maybe good people aren’t made by the law but by other people in little orange jumpsuits besides the rehabilitation program was a bitter disappointment so on day 79 i freed the city there you go big guy

Maybe we should hide you on day 80 i tore down the prison walls on day 81 i decided to rebuild them on day 83 i checked in on the parole officer kitty oh he’s dead ah i’m just kidding but did i waste an entire night getting a charged creeper just for this

Absolutely on day 84 the village decided to tear down my statue guys come on it’s part of our history no you’re right we should definitely tear it down on day 86 i set out on a secret ops mission to save the remaining alalu’s okay we’re just gonna have to

Sneak in nice and slow and oh my god ow i got him come with me if you want to live and on day 87 i may have started a raid all right everybody’s here let’s go oh no i’m such an idiot now i was gonna save this for later but there’s no time

Like the present this is my secret naughty box i actually had one of these in high school but uh you know what never mind you thought you could hide from me not today okay that’s round two go go and go yes i’ll fight all night if i have to to save these villagers

All right that’s round four let’s go after him oh my gosh i over jumped oh my gosh how many waves are there oh they’re in the village they are in the village oh oh goodness okay come on be the end be the end please be the end

Oh i did it all right how did we do is everybody okay the clerics here and my new cousin but what about gary oh you made it whoa he just gave me a book oh thanks gare i may have broken the law but the village was happier and safer than ever

It’s never felt so good to be so bad now despite becoming the undisputed robin hood of minecraft the trial to decide my fate was only a few days away so on day 91 i built the town hall and killed a few dozen creepers for no in particular

Reason on day 97 i tidied up the village here you go big guy and on day 99 i climbed the highest mountain to watch my final sunset well guys here we are we’ve made friends battled enemies and no matter the outcome of the trial tomorrow we’ll always have the memories that we made

Day 100 every law every permit every decision has led to this moment with a jury of my peers about to decide my fate so i made sure to fill it with some of my best and most merciful friends i don’t even know this guy well i mean at least it’ll be an

Unbiased trial oh hear ye hear ye court is now in session please proceed with the first talking i would just like to state that anything and everything that i’ve done for this city has been for this city and i feel like it’s time for me to be free

To be let go to become once again a part of minecraft society really because i have this list of uh things that were written down by your parole officer he’s dashingly handsome by the way oh you had two lalalas carrying around swords just hold the weapon don’t do it don’t

Is that possession of a weapon okay did you kidnap this entire town all prisoners are to remain in their cells until someone with actual legal authority arrives oh kidnapping is a pretty strong term did you imprison your parole officer get in the hole or i will

Murder you right now i mean this is a lofty lofty list of uh violations here but i’d say accusations i’m going to leave it to the jury this is a democracy this is the way things work here and uh you get a trial by the jury of your

Peers i’d say we just you know flip flip a quarter i you know flip a coin okay let’s flip a coin fifty-fifty head branzy’s head dies and tails we let his butt go free all right flip it up sorry buddy as it is yeah die you blew it i just

Want to say your honor i have done a lot of reflecting these last 100 days reflecting on what it means to be lawful what it means to be a good person and where my little pixels fit in this whole mix and real laws are important but uh minecraft is just a game

I knew it i knew it sometimes really no i knew it it’s a one way hold on guys just one second i put it in the wrong spot Oh [Applause] I really want to know is it was it really heads no it wasn’t hurts it was tails [Laughter] you better stop recording don’t you include