If Minecraft was a Dating Game

Ladies and gentlemen welcome to this video I’m a little scared right now ha this game is all about dating the mobs in Minecraft apparently that sounds great I love Minecraft and then I opened it and I have to censor the title screen and I’ve no idea what to expect you know

What I’m not gonna be judgmental these mobs may be wonderful I may even fall in love creeper I love you with all of my heart please will you marry me I have no idea what to expect with this games we’re gonna do it we’re just gonna do it

And to see what happens start my story I’m very ready oh goodness there’s already person here welcome player to Minecraft the very long awaited game very long-awaited I’ve been waiting for years to date my mobs oh man I’ve been waiting creeper I’m looking at you girl now I see one

Question what is your name I’ve never actually done a dating site before so this is very exciting I don’t know I mean I may find my soul mate what’s my name I should be anonymous right most dating sites are anonymous I will be Megatron well Megatron it’s bad pleasure to meet

You yes sir up there playing other people to meet oh I love meeting people these people can range anywhere from iron gum to villages to blazes in the nether Oh hot get it hot no I don’t want to I’m sorry please come back what is happening what Oh another bad dream you’ve been

Having those dreams ever since you saw zombies corpse it was talking is that pig are you talking to me after a couple grueling hours of running you made it here the woods you’ve been living here ever since who is talking to me am I talking to myself yes you are Parker okay cool

You’re welcome I’m scared you have no idea if any of the others miss or care about you at this point Wow sadness since you have been here for a week or so oh goodness welp it’s time to get my food for the day what a random I’m so depressed

Time to get some bacon I love me some bacon and pancakes you can kill your pig Gilbert or find some other food oh no Gilbert but you look so tasty though no no I can’t but I want bacon you must resist ah but bacon but he’s my

Friend I love him so much but bacon okay yeah you’re right kill him ah ah ah yes lovely beggin you didn’t want to do it no I really want to do it but with a low storage of food you didn’t have much of a choice actually I could just walk

Anywhere to find a cow but huh Gilbert was delicious you just had to cook up Gilbert and Eden before you think about it too much I’m sorry Gilbert I really wanted to do it I’m sure you’d be very delicious after having a full stomach in a guilty conscience you decide to explore the

Land around you ooh something you never leave bothered to do why would you never you’ve been here for a week what are you doing for a week just stand there you’re like yep all my friends hate me sup Gilberto eat you later what a better

They dated today to get away from a dead pig what is happening what I am so confused right now never seen this before oh it’s a cave which kind of makes sense since you did only start exploring because you murdered your best friend a pig oh goodness gracious

Yeah but bacon but it’s almost as you can see a shape of a person down in the cave should you either encounter it or continue moving heck no you move the heck on oh hey there are you murderer because I’m a person I love murder

Should we just go down should we just do it you traveled down the cave or continued searching I think we’re doing good on the cave we’ll say hi to our friend the murderer what’s the worst that could happen uhm worst that could happen I get eaten

Best that could happen I taste good mmm this doesn’t go very deep what’s the harm next brewing a little bit ah death you’re assuming the figure you can barely see down there just your own imagination so you continue anyway oh my goodness you can’t see a frickin thing

Down there maybe I heard somewhere around here let me just pull out of my butt please look ah there it is ah much better little smelly bit much oh gosh I can’t see a thing turn off the light my is this my first hey what’s up guy got

To put on my moves hold on hold on I got to look fancy the trick to online dating is just to make up things about yourself and impress them oh hello the spider it’s me out sooo busy counting my money hahahaha and also counting my many houses next to the

Beach I have I also speak 84 languages and my dad is Obama you both follow the ground confused and discombobulated oh I’m so Barbie lated hey hasn’t anyone ever told you to not in here someone’s Kate without the permission yes it’s called consent oh oh sorry I’m

Just walking by I thought someone very hot attractive was down here this beautiful woman with the wonderful red eyes that kind of terrify me in the soul nailed it I’ve never met someone else who look like you except that Megatron guy that’s me I wonder what happened to

Him sometimes what I’m right is it the Hat do you not recognize without the Hat catch I take it off it’s me Megatron oh my goodness Megatron it’s been so long actually judging by that face you probably sounds like a mechanic check Spitzer leg I’ve kind of missed you the most

Oh autobots roll out the red carpet cuz we’re getting married you both sit there and sounds for a minute or two Oh a minute or two in silence that is all long silence literally it’s like so how’s your mom in the distance you hear a crack of thunder

Oh no she jumps to the sounds of grabs you wrapping her arms around you Oh with the very scary white eyes after second to a silence she looks at you and unwraps herself from you that never leaves his case all right I’ll go check outside and see what the weather’s

Looking like do it you’re weirdly like float sideways and disappear this is a worst dating site in the world Hey what are you thinking about so intensely I was thinking about your beautiful face touching my beautiful face knowing would make a beautiful beautiful face I missed you as much as

It makes me seem like an idiot for saying it I really like you Oh spider I’m just gonna spell this out so no repeats okay okay where is this headed okay I love you oh gosh I’m not ready for that oh the hat work too well the hat work too well

I’m sorry I am 12 and I also am married and I also am dead I’m dead I’m sorry I can’t I can’t my mom’s called me I gotta go I’m sorry ah she wraps her arm around to you oh gosh no you’re so warm oh gosh uh so are

You silence oh gosh I feel uncomfortable I love you I love her too silent this is the most look t she felt she fell asleep what the heck I love you I love you too good night she tackles you throwing you down to the ground

She says the top of you well oh but you know what else oh what’s that close your eyes uh uh ah I can’t show any of this this is like oh gosh okay uh I don’t know what to say I’m gonna take a shower now and I’m gonna go wash my

Eyes and cry a lot I’ll see you guys see you next time next video oh gosh oh gosh Oh Oh God