Aphmau – Playing as an EVIL CRIMINAL In Minecraft!

I’ve been a good girl in minecraft but today i’m breaking the law me and my partner in crime break almost every minecraft law possible but when the minecraft police try to come and ruin our fun we’ll have to escape them and become the ultimate lawbreakers can we get away with our minecraft

Crimes or will we get caught oh by the way make sure to steal that red from the subscribe button by clicking it thanks oh and then run i am going to expand my house today and in order to do that i’m going to need some wood and yeah i

Have like 11 blocks here but you know what i’m gonna spend my time chopping down some trees here just making sure that everything is perfectly oh okay that’s fine you know what um i can use a sword to chop down trees here we go all right just uh

Do this like that you know maybe i can wait is it faster Calm down all right get out good job as a siren though you’re under arrest thank you wait what yes you’re under arrest for chopping down a tree without the proper tools we saw that crime against minecraft that you just committed ma’am um oh wait so when did you guys become

The minecraft police okay there’s no rule saying that uh actually there is rules saying that look at that sign behind you yeah take a look at it right here right on the lawn top of trees with an axe nothing but why would you put that on my lawn hey we

Don’t make the rules we just enforce the ma’am the sign is here you got to follow correction pierce we do make the rules because we are the minecraft police all right afmal i’m sorry i have to do this but we’re going to have to take you in

Wait what you’re gonna have to come up with us yeah no i’ve lost contact keep moving i’ve now wired the police after you did you just walk out of the way’s house with that pig my house who could have done this my husband vandalized police someone’s in Why were the police chasing you you made them chase me look i i chopped down a tree with my diamond sword what did you do huh i mean i may have stolen uh nothing nothing to certainly not noise diamonds or his pig or you know other things Welcome to my secret uh thief base uh mind the rules uh you saw on the front rule number one uh there are no rules and here’s rule number two rules are meant to be broken i’m tired of following the rules in minecraft i want to break them

Ian i’m gonna steal something from you give me a second uh breaking what i’ve rightfully stolen from you i don’t remember uh stealing that but uh oh whatever anyway yeah welcome to being a criminal wait a minute so we we can steal anything we want and break any rules we want

Yes we can and then you two can live the high stealing life like me and live happily ever after with thievery whoa we’re gonna break the laws in minecraft ian wait i i’ve always been a criminal oh um well i’m gonna be a criminal ah this is good this is really good look

At this oh my god yeah yeah and that is when we’re gonna take the hot air balloon and we’re gonna fly it right over the server and drop down with our chicken parachutes that sounds so cool oh my gosh all right so i’ve been working on it for months

Oh my gosh all right oh i’m excited i’ve never had a partner in crime wait what’s that you you weren’t followed were you no of course i wasn’t mr minecraft police opened up ma’am open up please the minecraft police weren’t up you were the one who

I followed you so who’s the one who’s really in charge here you have 10 seconds why or else we are going to be busting down the door ma’am i don’t think you’d want that um ma’am excuse me i am a sir uh no get out get in here all hands

Several voices in there for you about three seconds before to break down this door please okay i gave you three seconds oh there you are okay all right oh officer officer he’s the one who stole my pig oh he’s the one that stole your pink huh

You’re in here too yeah i’m in here zane what you’re associating yourself with this criminal how dare you what i’m not a criminal we’re we’re just uh we’re just best friends hanging out you stole my pig and probably a bunch of other stuff i bet my diamonds are missing too you can’t prove

That noise you can’t prove that well if you’d like us to not to try to prove that could you please let us in um no no the police are coming in anyway it’s dirty in here why to exercise your authority no no there are no pigs in here there are no pigs in

Here we’ll be doing a full investigation i saw you carrying my pigs anderson and there she is what that that’s not a pig that’s uh look i will say you have a very good uh sense of color here sir and what is this huh we are going to do

Crimes table meetings oh did we say crimes no that’s uh like like like uh like a community service crimes yes what what what yeah yeah service community really into making everything super yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no it looks like everything’s checking out we can’t find your diamonds here but

Wait a minute what’s that what’s what what is this they’re right behind you what do we have here no no this is not up to code this is a violation wood next to lava this is not going to work everybody stand back i’m going to take care of this

I’m telling you everything is fine i can fix it there we go all right let’s get out of here we can’t find any evidence of any wrongdoing here you have yourself some lovely obsidian now here thanks to us we saw it save the day solve the problems thanks

No this is private property we do need to leave yes please leave leave my mind all right hey hey look at me look at me you’re dressed very suspiciously like a criminal and i just gonna say this once all right i’ve got my eye on you

Just like pierce has both of his eyes on you okay i’ve got i’ve got both of them right here could you both use your three combined eyes to tell that these are criminals they’ve stolen my stuff and you’ve brought me out well there are proper procedures in place to

Determine whether or not they are criminals and so far they have not been triggered so therefore we must uh continue on our way all right get in the car all right uh yeah thank you thanks for coming by and never come back again for us we’ll be back those minecraft police thinking that

They could just come in and make all the rules they can’t make all the rules on the server we have other rules yeah oh they’re meant to be broken and they got rid of my love it’s okay ian we’re gonna get some more don’t worry

I won’t lava you alone all right i get it all right ian let’s make them pay for trying to make sure that we’re following the rules that they just made up okay all right all right here we go we got to break some minecraft rules all the minecraft rules all the laws of

Minecraft yes oh i am so excited to dig straight down in minecraft that’s the best way to dig and explore digging straight down in mine i’m turning on the siren we gotta go minecraft crime senses are tangling it gets you to the division stop criminal scum you violated the world cup

What are you doing for Oh that would be nice the only thing is that you’re gonna have to get out of there hey you know what we could give them to dig with what a sword Break the rules for our own benefit pierce get a hold of yourself oh i’m sorry i’m sorry you’re right i am not going to break the law just to get out of here why not you could totally do it no i’d rather explode than break the rules oh dab

What are you saying good thing that that’s an exploding sword wait what come on let’s go do some more crimes let’s go do crime yeah damn crime come on you’re supposed to be like a hardened criminal can’t you just lock make it open no i don’t have a lock pick this is my

Locked stick and you know it’s it’s it’s not really working this time i don’t know what’s up wait why did we spawn back in the pit i don’t know come on are they still there criminals it is illegal to place a spawn trap inside of a dark pit this is very unkind

And we will it’ll be on your permanent record just so you know okay there is a hefty fine of five gold bars um i mean diamond bars where would we find this permanent record uh yeah obviously the permanent record is over insane secret station over across the way

But you’ll never find it and even if you did we better not find it because it contains bunch of secret information as well as things like diamonds and gold and weaponry and tnt and my my password and my facebook account this officer thanks pierce you’re a doll

Bye come on wait wait wait no you can’t right here perfect all right all right i have a ladder gun okay here we go here we go Oh that’s amazing isn’t it come on let’s go let’s go where’d you get the ladder gun uh you know i stole it because i’m a criminal they left it unlocked up like they want to be stolen from them oh yeah be careful all right crawl make

Your make your way through it all right i can stick there oh ian uh are you okay buddy yeah yeah i’m fine i’m back it’s fine oh we gotta get to the computer yeah we gotta get to the computer all right hack the system hack the system bro i’m on it

Uh uh uh uh uh uh done all right i’m in wait i could have just gotten on they got minesweeper on this oh you know what pulled me right through the laser you opened the boat with you all right finally got it good now hit the gas let’s get back i

Think we’re heading this is the police we heard [Applause] uh to keep officers off of their own property stop being good at fixing furniture they have hostages we got to get in there now it’s lit it’s lit it’s lit i’m trying my best officer but she’s very good at carpentry

All right let’s go let’s get out of here Why would you take the short ramp that’s right let’s go do more crime and you hey ian we’ve been committing minecraft crimes and breaking the minecraft law but we haven’t really broken i don’t know like like you know crazy things you know yeah yeah you know we gotta do some uh

Good old-fashioned criminal things like uh break into someone’s house oh that’s a good but who who’s an easy target um ian i mean no what nothing that’s my house no no let’s look over here we got a pierce’s house he he’s already after us we got what about noise house Oh yeah i forgot i i may have already robbed him earlier oh that’s right you did wow you really took oh you really took everything guys what are you doing oh it’s annoying we’re gonna burglarize you okay sure just uh let me know if you need anything wait wait wait wait

You don’t care you’re not gonna you’re not gonna like chase us off or anything again yeah well i mean why am i going to put the effort you kind of already robbed me earlier today so oh yeah not a lot left that’s so sad all right hang on

I’ve got an idea don’t worry we’re going to get we’re going to get we’re going to go get you some new stuff come on in we got this we got us so so what are we what are we doing so we’re gonna go steal from uh let’s do it from let’s steal from

Mac’s house and give it to noy okay oh okay this girl just straight up left her doors open does she not know any better my god no no she she lives a carefree life you know i cannot believe this we’re going to take this i’m going to take that stuff here

Um take a break get the fridge get this all right uh you ready to leave you ready to leave yeah yeah yeah let’s take this to noise house oh yeah yeah come on come on come on take this stuff too whoa cool sarah sarah did santa come on We got you all these chairs we got you this tape we got you a lot of nice things all right hey some diamonds some diamonds oh it’s all full of vegetables but uh guys you’ve got a sink oh you know what that should sink please yeah we brought you everything but the kitchen

Sink sorry about that so uh we’ll see you later bye noy enjoy your new stuff bye bye guys thanks again okay so now we’re gonna rob them right yeah i’m ready perfect all right and yeah yeah what are you doing we’re here oh is there no water amongst thieves never

Come on ian let’s go he’s got a barn to rob oh nice hey get away from my barn come on guys guys guys come on no no no no no steal the doors oh come on Let’s when did you get this build today is your first day well you know i just uh i’ve been a little bit of criminally myself look i got all this stuff i got some cookies i got um some emeralds some cool things yeah it’s it’s a decent secret criminal

Base not as nice as mine yet but we’ll get you there knock knock knock what hello hey guys how’s it going hey you can’t just barge in here sir yeah that’s against the law um well you know i i’m kind of tired of the law these days so i’m just gonna start

Just start taking your stuff here we go let’s just try to change careers officer pierce wait wait wait wait wait now what since he’s not being a cop anymore what if we make him join us that’s right let’s go talk to him pierce him pierce what what’s up come here come here we

Have we have a proposition for you a proposition all right okay what’s up funny business a funny business what are you talking to of course not what’s going on though what’s happening how about you team up with uh me and ian here all right like we got that we got the the criminal

Outfits we got the you know me teaming up being so much a member of the lawn yeah yeah yeah since you want to be a criminal oh so you mean like rogue broke cop team up with the with the criminals because you know we’re gonna do the stuff yeah yeah

Yeah yeah yeah that sounds that’s about [ __ ] yeah Oh no yes that’s my response uh i’m open to counter negotiations i’m gonna get rid of your peers i swear i hate to say this but zayn was right we have to obey the minecraft loss all right we got to team up with zane come on let’s go find zayn hurry up

With zayn oh zayn we need to report a crime what what is it all right uh-huh are you turning yourselves in no you’re explaining a new thing okay so uh this better be important okay okay i don’t know if you knew this but athmo and i are criminals yes yeah i

Kind of got that already second um you hear those explosions in the distance and that uh crazy maniacal laughter yeah that one yeah yeah so uh your your partner officer pierce has uh kind of lost it and trying to be a criminal too but but in

Like the worst way yeah yeah yeah yeah i knew he lost it when he stopped with the wee woos he’s no longer your friend no more right he’s a criminal no all right he is going to destroy the server he is going to destroy everything

Zayn look at me in the eye look at me in the eye i can only look down so far okay whoa fine fine fine all right look just help us stop him zane all right and and and you know what if you help us out and we’ll stop being criminals

You’ll stop being criminals then i’ll put in a good word with the church let’s serve up some justice yeah yeah you gotta stop him you’re the only one who can do it all right go go go go go go go go go go all right [Applause]

Oh my god he’s over there he’s over there he’s over there this is the police no that’s enough pierce do you remember the code you took when you joined the force of course i remember the code who i mean it’s step one of of being on the force types of dog

Yes so you remember exactly what it was that you committed to of course to protect and uphold the minecraft laws of course minecraft loss including number one no digging down number two only eden mutton on tuesdays number three making sure that you don’t cut down trees with anything other than axes and

Number four that we always make sure to be the kindest that we can be to each other on a server and if you fail to uphold those what happens uh that your badge will explode wait wait what do you mean about that oh that’s not good i can be good

Officer pierce you are officially decommissioned Awesome i’d probably deserve that thank you so much zane for helping us take officer we’ll talk more about your sentencing later at least you’re doing community service now and helping repair the bridge so about so that should count towards we are criminals though rebuild the bridge you say i will I think the siren needs to be fixed yeah it’s really broken it’s really really broken yep