Limited Life Recap – Week 1 | Minecraft News Network

[Pixie] Hello and welcome back to MCNN! My name is Pixie- [Lyric] -and I’m Lyric. Initially this newscast was created to report on the MCYTblr Sexyman Poll, but recently our horizons have broadened to reporting on the new Limited Life series. [Pixie] We’d prefer they stop broadening around here.

[Pixie] Our goal each week is to present to you a summary of what terrible crimes happened in that three-hour block covering any interesting plans, traps, or goofs in rough chronological order. We want to do the groundwork so if someone has school, work, or just wants to devote their week to watching

One perspective and turning it into a musical number, they can do that without missing anything huge. [Lyric] We aren’t a real news program, but we sure like to play one on TV, and our style reflects that! You may watch other summary projects, like the Hermitcraft Recap, which summarize events by person or group.

Unlike them, we’ll be covering events in roughly chronological order. This suits the chaotic flow of the Life Series better, but that does involve a LOT of work – if any viewers want to help with timeline generation or video transcription, even for a single POV, please reach out! [Pixie] With all that said,

What are our top stories for tonight, Lyric? [Lyric] We’re back in the latest Life Series that started March 3rd, 2023 with 14 familiar faces! [Lyric] While attempts to ritually summon Season 2 players Mumbo and Lizzie back to the series failed, fan favorite Skizzleman has returned after missing the Double Life series last year.

[Pixie] The universe giveth and it taketh away; for the first time, Life Series veteran Rendog will not be joining this season. Lost dog posters are proliferating across social media. Our sources have confirmed that he has in fact been sent to a TCG arena upstate. [Lyric] One additional POV note –

Bdubs will not be recording his own perspective, due to the time commitment required to edit down 3 hours of footage. So anytime he’s off screen, your guess is as good as canon on what he’s up to! [Pixie] In exciting news, this marks the first time

We’ve seen a map with significant access to an ocean, and a warm ocean at that! Finally we’ve gained access to the main thing this fandom was missing: water symbolism. [Lyric] Alright, it’s time to dive into what actually happened over those two and a half hours,

Starting with Grian explaining the premise for the season! [Grian] Welcome to Limited Life, where we have 24 hours to live. 14 people are battling to be the last one standing and in this series, you are green when you are above 16 hours, yellow when above 8 hours,

And red when you are above 0. Every time you die, you lose 1 hour of time and if you successfully kill someone, you gain 30 minutes. Yellows can attack greens, and of course, when you turn red, you become hostile and can attack anyone. And of course, if you run out of time,

You are eliminated from the series. There’s a few more surprises in store, So let’s get started. [Pixie] With the rules explained, the 14 Lifers scattered to the winds. [Lyric] Jimmy Solidarity wandered off alone to collect potential sources for monopolizing, while Grian was more interested in seeing

If the Chance card Jimmy drew would read Do Not Pass Go, Go Directly to Permadeath. [Pixie] But while some players forged their own paths, others chose to team up right from the start. Scar, Cleo, and Bdubs formed a group called the [Pixie clears throat and enunciates] the Clockers

Where they proceeded to get wood and get weird. [Lyric] Tango, Impulse, and Skizz quickly teamed up, and then added an Etho to the group, who suggested the name TIES. And thus began the unending quest for cows as most of their cows were later lost to random acts of Joel.

This is enough to encourage Martyn to cut ties with Team TIES. [Pixie] Fate chose Scott as the first boogeyman of the season, who lurked around until he was able to kill Skizzleman. [Lyric] Because Scott was so quick, Etho and Grian- [cough] the group decided to pick a second boogeyman. [unintelligible mumble from Impulse]

[Impulse] Okay, whoever gets it – [Impulse] take your time, please [Tango] The worst! [followed by Among Us Musical Sting] [Impulse] We don’t need a third boogeyman today [Lyric] This time Bdubs was the Boogey, and immediately turned on a recently-respawned Skizz. His reasoning? [Bdubs] So, you- you were already on the-

On the way down; the rollercoaster down. Anybody else, it’d be like they’re on a high, they’re going up. [Tango] Skizzle- [Bdubs] You know? And then I- I- make [Tango, overlapping] Skizzle, you hear someone talking? [Bdubs] I make their life worse [Skizzle] What is that? [Bdubs (overlapping)] Yours was already bad,

[Bdubs] So I just thought “well, a little bit more wouldn’t hurt” [Lyric] Scar and Bdubs set out for food and adventure, and adventure finds them when Scar dies trying to jump into a river. Learning nothing, he and Bdubs raided the woodland mansion. They decided to try to sell their findings to other players;

At least the BS shop is honest in advertising! [Pixie] While her 2 idiots were still off exploring, Cleo went mining, finding a Pearl and some of Grian’s poorly-placed poultry. [Lyric] After lone-wolfing their way through the start of the game, Joel and Jimmy met up on TIES’ island

And labelled their new alliance as the Bad Boys. They made their way over to the woodland mansion, where Pearl was amassing a collection of diamond hoes. [Pixie] Because the first two went so well, the gang decided to pick a third boogeyman. However, in the interest of protecting Skizzleman

[Pixie, overlapped by Skizzle screaming] on his terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day, they decided to form the Skizzleman Protection Squad. New member, Martyn, demonstrated incredible self-control by not immediately boogey-killing Skizz, allowing the group to disperse between the Nether and a bargain with Scar.

We’re still not sure who got the better end of that deal. [Lyric] Scar and Bdubs took Pearl and Scott for a ride near some creepers, which goes slightly better than you’d expect from that crew. Impulse and Grian showed up in time to confirm that

Neither raiding party actually took the diamond block in the mansion causing Grian to go do that. [Pixie] In “food other than bread” news, Tango got 2 more cows, and they died immediately Tango quickly found another cow, which lasted so much longer! Er- Just kidding, Joel finds it.

[Lyric] And in “these are professionals” news, Joel and Jimmy challenged each other to dig straight down to prove their Bad Boy Status. Here’s how that went: [Joel] -diamonds at Y=11. Alright… [Jimmy] To 11, ready? [Joel] right next to each other – 3, 2, 1, go! [Jimmy] Go!

[Jimmy] Bad Boys, Bad Boys, Bad Boys! [Jimmy] Bad Boy energy here [Joel] I’ve got- wh- ooh emeralds! [Jimmy vocalizes] [Joel] What are we at? 23! [Joel] 10 more, we’ve made it [Jimmy] I can hear lava! I can hear lava [Jimmy] But we keep going- [burning sound effects plays; Jimmy starts shouting] [Joel] oh-

[Joel] oh no! [Jimmy (overlapping)] I’m dying, I’m actually dying! [Jimmy] I’m dead I’m dead, I’m- [Joel laughs and wheezes] [Pixie] Getting back on their feet, The Bad Boys went to intimidate Martyn before terrorizing TIES island. Joel saw another cow and I think we can all see where this was going

[cheers from Joel and Jimmy; shouting from TIES] While running away, Jimmy apologized to his former soulmate after punching him out of the way. The concentration of ‘Bad’ in the Bad Boys does not seem to be evenly distributed. [Lyric] Scar pitched setting up on the spawn mountain, Pearl supports the idea

And Scott suggests a way to monetize it. Cleo returns to the mountain with iron galore. [Pixie] Pearl and BigB formally decide to team up, which is a completely reasonable decision given the existing group choices were ‘Group of Dads’, ‘Chaotic Cringefail’ ‘I would kill you for one clock’ and ‘Former/Current Boogeymen’.

Pearl tamed Froggie the cat, and together she and BigB formed the Nosy Neighbours, who were soon after visited by Etho. BigB decided to pretend to be the Boogeyman, utilizing a narrative device called ‘dramatic irony’. [Lyric] In the spirit of poor decisions, Joel started building on the mansion,

Which was both flammable and due to reset due to generating without Illagers. Grian, impressed by this display of genius, joined the Bad Boys. While the other Bad Boys were away, Jimmy received a gift from Scott in the form of a bucket of pufferfish: the Pufferish of Peace.

This is the fourth time Scott has begun a Life series with a gift for his former teammate. [Pixie] Scar declared the Clockers’ home Secure Mountain and Insecure Mountain, both of which can’t possibly be true. I’m crossing my fingers that he uses those naming skills for his own team,

To pick something a bit less like a linguistic banana peel waiting to cause a Freudian slip. Scott arrived to trade a golden apple with Scar, and Bdubs decided their horses deserved only the best. Then Martyn appeared, and Scar ironically tried to pitch becoming a hitman

To the only person who could possibly do the job. Martyn said nothing as Cleo got creepered. [Lyric] Bdubs declared Cleo Mom after she insisted he and Scar wear clothes, which does seem like a thing most people would insist on. [Pixie] Cleo has never seen an opportunity for arson they didn’t like,

And Scar gave her one in the form of the woodland mansion. For more on the fire, we go now to our field reporter. [Salem] I’m currently standing outside the remains of Bad Boy Manor, where things are really heating up! [Salem] After a member of the Bad Boys taunted GoodTimesWithScar –

A move which has historically gone poorly – tragedy struck and the woodland mansion went up in flames. With little sign of the fire going out any time soon, we can only assume the mansion being replaced next session will simply give this wildfire more wood to burn through.

We’ve heard from an anonymous source that it was not, in fact, Scar who started the fire, but his teammate, ZombieCleo. Cleo has wisely been unavailable for comment on the matter. [Salem] Scott, Jimmy, and Martyn were all present at the start of the fire, with Joel and Grian joining later,

But despite their best attempts to douse the flames, water bucket clutches are not particularly effective at firefighting. Following the incident, the Bad Boys most decidedly became the Sad Boys but knowing who the team members are, we can only assume next week might see some revenge from the mad boys of the server

Against the arsonists who – allegedly! – incinerated their home. Back to you! [Pixie] Thank you, Salem! While the fire took no lives, in another part of the map a wayward creeper managed to take two: Imp and Skizz. [Skizzle] It really opens up, dude, [Skizzle] Huge cave [Tango] Ohh, huge ravine

[Tango] That’s a Death Trap right there, too… [Skizzle] Aww, that’s no problem. [Skizzle] I feel like a creeper’s gonna fall on my head. [Skizzle and Impulse talking, unclearly] [Skizzle] No, you’re gonna- [Impulse and Skizzle scream as a creeper explodes] [Lyric] Scar also used the fire and the newly respawned “audience”

To declare the Clockers’ home Entertainment Mountain, the best place on the server to watch your friends die. [Pixie] Scott showed up and asked who burned the mansion, and Pearl sold out Cleo to her former soulmate [Lyric (voiceover)] Etho attacked Martyn with the pufferfish as a “joke”.

Martyn tried to lava Skizz as a “joke”, then tried less subtly to blow up TIES. Not a joke. No one died except for the cows, which would normally be preferred but at this point TIES would really rather have the cows. [Pixie] Clockers visited the mansion,

And Grian blamed Scar for the fire because confirmation bias is a hell of a thing. [Lyric] Pearl and BigB started to set up a place to live. Martyn, on the run from his failed TNT kill on TIES, ran up with the sketchiest body language possible in Minecraft,

And killed BigB after a short chat. He paid a diamond as an apology, and then walked off to – and died down – the straight vertical hole Etho dug at the beginning of the episode. If Minecraft isn’t supposed to have circles, what’s with all these cyclical narratives?

[Pixie] As of the end of session, most players have diamonds and basic gear, and are looking at building out their bases next session. [Lyric] 21.5 hours remain on average, but some players ended the week above or below EST That’s “Etho Standard Time” To review where everyone stands,

And who we’ll see dip below yellow and get to kill this Friday, here’s Joju! [Joju] Thanks, Lyric. Since this session lasted 2 and a half hours, the “normal” amount of time to have left at this point would be 21 hours and 30 minutes. Of course, as any fan of the Life SMP knows,

These creators are anything but normal. Only 5 of the 14 players have that amount of time left, with most coming in at an hour less. The big exceptions are Scott and Bdubs, each with an additional hour at 22 hours and 30 minutes left.

Interestingly, both got the same amount of time in the same way – killing Skizzleman. There was also a glitch that did not give Martyn the full reward from boogeymanning BigB, but that has been manually corrected. So if you see Martyn gain some time back, that’s why.

Because of how lives work this season, everyone should be starting session 2 with a green life, but Skizz is guaranteed to drop down to yellow pretty quickly next session. And considering that he has a hit list, Skizz is definitely one to watch next time.

Finally, we’d like to issue our award for “funniest death.” This week, that award goes to the Bad Boys, for their contributions to the study of lava. Back to you. [Pixie] Thank you for that analysis Joju! [Pixie] It’s been a heck of a first week on the Limited Life server,

And we’re looking forward to the next. [Lyric] Like many of our viewers, we went into this series hoping to see our favorites make it to the end. However, since starting this project, we’re just hoping for more deaths less POVs to recap makes our job easier!

[Pixie] But no matter how things turn out, we’ll be back next week to track the time for all fourteen – or maybe fewer? – players on Limited Life SMP. Special thanks to our editor, TheQueenAsteri, for all their hard work on this video.

All sources used today are listed at the end of the episode. [Pixie] But until next time, my name is Pixie. [Lyric] And I’ve been Lyric. See you next week!