minecraft but 100 axolotls beat the game for you

-All right. We’re checking out the only game where you can take adorable walking fish and turn them into blood-thirsty, psychotic serial killers. It’s Minecraft. I wish I knew exactly how to pronounce these things. I watch three different videos on it, and I heard it three different ways.

Either way, we now recruit one of them every 30 seconds, and they all have distinct personalities and abilities. Effectively, we can have an infinite army of these, but that’s not all. They also level up and gain additional powers. And so today, I’m not going to do anything.

I’m going to let my plushie little minions feast upon the Ender Dragon. Seriously, we added a lot of zeroes to these things. You know what? I-I wanna be able to at least call you guys what you really are, so, uh, hold on a second here. Hey, Google, how do you pronounce axolotl?

Google: That’s pronounced axolotl. Gray: Oh, I-I did something right. I feel like this is a lie. All right, whatever. If Google says it, it must be true. First, we have to determine exactly how strong they are at their base values. Go, my children. Go get them. Yeah. That’s what happens.

Now, they have a taste for blood. Don’t you run from me. Look at them. There’s a giant line of them just chasing after the villager. [laughs] Surround him. Julie, good job. Willie, Kayla, Lisa. All right. Now, I don’t know if all you guys know,

But we live on a very strict diet of carbs and human flesh. Luckily, this village happens to have both. Okay, we’re getting new axolotls like really fast. This is going to get out of hand very quickly. Don’t worry Reginald, they’re not as adorable as you. None of them have top hats, yet.

All righty. A little yeety thing like this, all of the bread. Now because, uh, anytime I ever utilize something as a friend in this game, they always end up murdering all of my piglins, we’ve decided to program them to, uh, have some special symbiosis with piglins. You’ll see. All righty.

All right, we’re ready to roll. Hey, Iron golem. I need your iron for the very first upgrade. Hold on, don’t go anywhere. Stay right there. Do me a favor, come a little bit closer. Get your iron ass over here. Reginald, push him over here. Thank you. All right, get him. [laughs]

Yes, chew on his ankles. Excellent. You will all gain new powers from his blood. Do it, Cheryl. She’s-she’s so good. Gregory is in there. There’s Kevin, fantastic. All right. Now, then. [laughs] Oh, my God. In case you’re wondering, they’ve been upgraded. [laughs] All right, everyone. Give me your loot.

Ooh. Oh, yeah. When in doubt, carb it out. Okay. Now, they give me special abilities too. What are you guys shooting at? Hold on. I got to– [laughs] Oh, God. It’s under the ground, isn’t it? Hold on. Stop, you psychopaths. Oh, my God. Oh, what a nightmare.

No, I just– There’s another one that just spawned. I can’t get out of here. Okay, we gotta– Hold on. I gotta- I gotta move. There. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. These little axolotls are like, “Dad, we’re hungry.” Here. Did they just drop me a fish? Oh, they did. A cooked salmon. Thank you.

I’m just curious, what do you guys think of cows? Do you and- do you and cows get along or–? Oh, my God. They do not. I-I would ask about sheep, but I have a feeling they already know what the answer is. Death to sheep kind. Hold on, I gotta– [chuckles]

Oh. Oh, my God. I almost died. You pushed me into the freaking lava. Ah, they’re all burning. My little axolotl children. Ooh, they’re giving me resistance. All right. Well, hold on. I need to get some more iron real quick. That’s right kids, play in the- play in the lava.

You too, Reginald. Everyone have fun in the lava. Gerald, the lava’s over there, buddy. This is both awful and amazing. Swoop. Man, you guys are really good at killing everything that’s not you. All right. Chill out, you maniacs. All right, we’re getting there. Welcome to the group, Gregory.

They’re like the best kids you could get. They’re so tired of me only seeing bread that they given me a bunch of cooked salmon. A little bit of this. There we go. All right, everyone, let’s do this. Logan, Logan, you’re in the way, Logan. Logan. Figures that Logan would be the one.

Okay, my amount of little helpers here is starting to get out of hand. We’ve gotta get them upgraded to the next level though. Okay, the number of axolotls is starting to get out of hand. I don’t think that there’s a limit to how many can spawn. Maybe I should have made one.

What do you guys see? Because I can’t see anything. Ugh. Okay. Oh, yeah. Oh, I can’t hear it now. Hey. There we go. Hell, yes. That’s right everyone, out into the lava. Well done Sandra. Can one of you girls like put me out, please? Thank you. And yoink. There’s so many.

I can’t see anything. All right, good enough. We gotta find some gold. Come on, everyone. All right, pass the lava. I would tell you not to touch it, but no one listens to me anyway. Hey, here we go. Get them. Kill them. Slay the non-believers. Well done. Oh, a creeper.

Oh, oh. Okay, okay. All right, okay. Oh, my God. I can only imagine they’re all like, “Murder, murder, murder, murder, murder.” All right, I haven’t found any gold or anything yet, so we’re going down deeper. What’s this? Did I reach bedrock? If so, I haven’t found any diamonds. Okay, I hear more lava.

Otherwise known as Reginald’s bath time. Oh, it’s so close. I’d like to take a moment to mention that my axolotls are so metal that they-they don’t bathe in water, they bathe in lava. Oh, lava. I hear you. Whoa, found it. Please don’t push me into the lava.

Please don’t push me into the lava. Okay, there. This-this is a little bit too- little bit too dangerous. Oh, super ore. Ah, also lava. Anna, lead the way. Oh, my God. You did lead the way. Congratulations, Anna. You get a promotion. You found all the super ore, didn’t you?

All right, kids. Who likes miracle grow. Oh, there’s diamond down here too. We’re heading upward. Okay, we’re finally at a point where we’re gonna be able to upgrade them. Oh, hi. Oh, by the way. Um, they’re starting to build Reginald totems now. [laughs] All right, first thing’s first though. I need this tree.

Well, I need part of this tree. Give me your delicious sapling salad. Here we go. All right, it’s time to get stupid. Super saplings, go. [grunts] Super sapling number two, yeet. Behold. Oh, my God. Aha, and, uh, we’ll grab that. Wonderful. Hey, no more bread. Finally, got a good amount of, uh, gold.

Okay. Now, we can finally begin the upgrading process. Yeet. [laugh] All right, now real quick. Before we do anything. Since they’ve been upgraded, I do need to test just how powerful this level of upgrade form is. Is there anything around that you guys can slay? Look at the path of greatness behind us.

There we go, a chicken. Slay the chicken. Ooh, their aim is getting real good. Okay, and they can mind blocks now. Okay, so now we need to go to diamond. Here you go. All right, do we have any volunteers around?

Is there like- is there like at least one chicken that was left alive? You killed them all, didn’t you? There’s gotta be something. Here we go, a sheep. Okay, show me your true power, everyone. Go. Get them. Oh, they’re explosive arrows now. [chuckles] I kinda forgot where I came from,

But all I have to do is follow the path and the gigantic string of Reginalds. You know what? We do need a better test to see just how powerful they are. All right, I have an idea. I think you know what time it is. It’s time to add zeroes.

All right, throw them one of these. I’m gonna put this right on Reginald’s ass. Put that on there, and, uh, yeah, we’ll do some of this. Aha, perfect. Go. Whoo. All right. Get them. Oh, wow. They are vicious. [laughs] Oh, my God. Haaah. Okay, now– Hold on now.

There’s one last thing that we’ve got to do, and that is give them their last level. All right, now let’s see how strong you all are. Oh, they can jump now. Go. Yes. It’s like the 4th of July. Patriotism. [laughs] Oh, the Ender Dragon has no idea what’s coming. All right, well then.

Give this the old yeetilydeet. Please don’t try and suffocate me. Stop it. We need obsidian to completely overpower the Nether. I can’t build a portal here on the way. I love how the more I get, the more buffs I get. All right, let’s do this. It’s party time. Hi, Nether.

You don’t even wanna know. All right, slay the ghast. [laughs] Hey, where’s your less sad piglin brothers? Yeah, this looks good. Oh, blazes. What’s stronger, water or fire? What the hell. What are you shooting at? Oh, my God. Hey. Okay, I can hear them. They’re close.

They’re all trying to get through this wall, so this has to be it. [screams] It’s the 4th of July of death. Okay, there’s a wither. Well, there was a wither skeleton. [laugh] Oh, my God. Oh, blaze rods. I didn’t even know that they killed the blaze.

I-I– Where did you get this blaze from? [laughs] Oh, my God. I can’t even see. That’s so ridiculous. Oh, God, stop. I almost feel bad for the blazes there they are. Yes. Go. I can’t even tell if there’s any rods. Whatever was there just got absolutely massacred. Hi, wither skeleton. Bye, wither skeleton.

All right, here we go. Found some more blazes. Oh, there’s a whole slew of them. Oh, I found the blaze motherlode. Get them, girls. Yeah. More. All right. Uh, almost there. Is that– Is there one there named Karen? [laughs] That’s kind of amazing.

All right, I’m pretty sure there was a blaze over here somewhere, I think. Yeah, there was. Look. There we go, got it. All right, sweet. All my axolotls are sick, and they vomit death. Could you lea– [sighs] Could you leave a couple of piglins? Okay, yeah, there’s one. There.

I love that this piglin is like, “You know what? Whatever. I’ll trade. Please don’t kill me.” I can’t even tell what he’s trading for. I can’t see. Please don’t kill these piglins. Please don’t kill these piglins. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Stop. Oh, my God.

What have I done? No more. They’re all they’re already dead. They’re already dead. Please drop some pearls. You know, you really suck at this. There has to be like one left alive somewhere. Oh, here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Please don’t kill this one sad, lone piglin.

Don’t push him into the fricking lava either. Oh, you guys are impossible. I love how this one piglin is just walking through a firestorm of death, a literal firestorm. Anthony, don’t-don’t fo– Anthony, don’t follow that piglin around. Stop it. Anthony, Laura, don’t push the piglin into the lava.

Do not push the piglin into the lava. In case you’re wondering, the benefit here was that the axolotl spawn gold anytime they’re near a piglin, which is supposed to make my job a lot easier. However, the issue I seem to be having is– Hey.

I was gonna say is that they slay everything around them. All right, we’re one-third of the way there. Come on. Come on. No. Why do you keep going on a walking journey? Just stay there. Do not walk toward the death. Walk away from the death. He walked toward the death.

All right, anyone else still alive? Oh, here we go. Here, little piglin. It’s adorable. I would feel really bad if you randomly imploded upon yourself. Okay, luckily, I think that the axolotls have killed everything around here. Well, never mind. Okay, everything’s calm. Everything’s calm. No one’s blowing up. Everyone is fine.

Dylan, do not look at me sideways. Okay, this is going real smooth right now. We are almost there. I can see Laura’s over there. She’s like, “He looks so tasty.” Don’t do it, Laura. Come on, piglins. You know what would be great? If you didn’t suck at your job. There we go.

We’re at– Okay, sweet. Back through we go. All right, which way to the land of agony? This way it is. This is the first time where I actually hope it’s in the middle of the water because– Oh, my God, the swim speed. Every once in a while they kill something behind me.

I don’t even know what it could be. More ocean, hell yes. Look at the rainbow of death behind me. And Reginald’s keeping up with them too, what a trooper. Whoop. All right. Crap, I’m sorry squid. You can actually see all of the explosions behind me from the squid death.

Oh, no. All the horses. Oh, no. [chuckles] Oh, it’s awful. Okay, I think we’re pretty much where we should be. Did my eye just go instead of Reginald’s head? Are you kidding me? Sorry, Reginald. All right, I’m pretty sure it’s down here.

If– [chuckles] If they would get out of my way so I can actually dig. Hold on, I can’t see again. There we go. Okay, I didn’t- I didn’t think I would ever make it. Oh, my God. Holy crap. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Do not break the portal. Do not break the portal. Do not break– Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it. Oh, my god. All right, you know what? I just gotta do this. I just gotta do it. I just gotta do it. We’re doing it. We’re doing it. We’re out of here. Hoo.

Oh, what the hell? [screams] Where did it spawn me? It is total bedlam. I’ve got to rise up. [grunts] They’re almost throwing me off the edge with their damn explosions. Okay, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill. Everyone, chill. Chill out, chill. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

Okay, I’ve made it up to the main area. I just need to dig my way out because trying to do it climbing is just gonna get me killed. Okay, we’re out. Let’s do this. Ender Dragon, you’re gonna wish you had never been born. This is a really big Ender Dragon area.

Come, my axolotl children. Go. Go. Hold on, I’ve got to- I’ve got to do this. We have to see this the way it was meant to be seen. [laughs] Look at them. Oh, they’re incredible. Yes. The starfighters were taking down the Death Star. Whoo, and the Kessel run is done.

That’s what I’m talking about. [screams] Well, you can’t spell axolotl without lot, as in a lot of freaking chaos. All right, folks. Hope you enjoy this episode of Minecraft. Till next time. Stay foxy and much love.