Presidents Universe – US Presidents Play Minecraft Horror Maps 2

Hey guys are you ready to play some more Minecraft horror maps oh I am Barack I am oh I had so much fun last time oh for God’s sake do we really have to go play some more of those crappy Maps the last time that we played this one of them

Didn’t work and the other one was a goddamn door simulator with 2010 screamers trust me Donald this one is going to be so much better all right fine but if there are literally any doors being involved this time then I am going to leave so fast that well I don’t

Know but I will be leaving very fast all right guys here we go so this map is apparently called Poison I’m not exactly sure how they are going to make a Minecraft map with a poison theme but I am sure as hell pumped to see it the only thing that I am seeing

Right now Barack is Joe finding yet another way to be in the closet it’s so cozy in here guys oh I do hope that we see more of those later I’m not so sure of that Joe from the looks of things those are supposed to be areas that you can hide in

If there are places that you can hide in then that usually means that there is something that you need to be hiding from all of these statutes look pretty cool I wonder if there are any kind of scrawny old men hiding inside of them Donald what in the actual are you talking about

Why are you talking so goddamn weird can you just come over here and make sure that you put your mask on that goes for you too Joe okey-dokey bird what the were you hiding there the entire goddamn time of course I was Barack I heard that they were going to make a

Statue of me so I’m gonna have to get some practice in if I want to be able to stay still for that long Joe what the are you talking about you realize that the statues aren’t actually the people that they are portraying right they are literally just a sculpted clump

Of stone well that is so obviously not true Donald how the hell would I have been able to have that talk with Lincoln if they’re just made of stone you don’t even make sense these days Donald Joe I am starting to think that you are actually just straight up schizophrenic

That’s a worry for another day though let’s just get this map started wait why did everything go dark who the hell is the Potato Man obviously that is the guy who made the map Joe Are you seriously that inept this must just be some kind of title card oh you’re right Donald

Oh but why did it have to be called Poison Poison is seriously scary you know Joe I literally said the name of the map when we started the episode why are you only just getting scared by it now I I was too busy getting into the closet how long is this title screen

Going to take anyway oh my God it’s a loud noise protect me Joe it is literally just Thunder how the hell are you supposed to handle the horror bit of this whole thing if you cannot even handle the basic nature bit don’t worry Donald I’m pretty sure that I’ve already got

That whole thing figured out look here Joe I’ve got a little present for you holy jumping Jehovah’s Witness it’s a teddy bear oh thank you so much Barack now I feel Invincible you’re very welcome Joe that might just be the most autistic interaction that I have ever seen let’s go Mr Teddy there’s

Absolutely nothing that can hurt us for as long as we stick together oh look there’s a house here oh yippee I even got some new shoes um I think that you guys might want to turn around real quick oh why what’s going on over holy Joe are you all right holy pepperoni Molly

That was close thank God that I had Mr Teddy here to save me I could have never done it without him how the are you not dead that Steve guy seemed to fall onto the exact same trap and he definitely does not look like he is in an all right

Condition it is just like I was saying Donald there is absolutely nothing that can hurt me while I have Mr Teddy by my side all right well we are definitely letting you go first from now on then if you can get hit with the equivalent of a Mortal Kombat Fatality and be

Absolutely fine then all we have to do is make sure that anything that gets thrown at us hit you first okey dokey Barack while I have teddy by my side I’m not scared of anything so we have swapped out a Joe that won’t shut the

up about how scared he is for a Joe that won’t shut the up about some stupid teddy bear if I wanted to hear a story about a degenerate and a teddy bear then I would have watched that movie with the Peter Griffin guy wait do you guys see that

Why is there some random villagers head just sticking out of that composter why the would I know Barack oh damn something tells me that you’re not going to be able to fix that with just a plaster and a kiss that guy sure does look like he has seen some

I wonder if that’s just because of all of the dead people or because of something that we haven’t even seen yet oh please don’t go saying that Donald I really don’t want to know what’s going to happen to us if we meet whatever it is that did that to him wait

But I thought that you were having some big moment where you felt Invincible because of your stupid teddy bear what the hell happened to all of that nothing changed about that Donald I am worried about what it’s going to do to you guys not me I don’t think that there is anything

That can give me and Mr Teddy a hard time but you guys are still oh so vincible trust me Joe you don’t need to worry about me I’ll show this murderous bastard what the Big D Trump can do all right well while you two keep bickering I’m going to head through the forest

Barack Barack is everything okay why don’t we go check on him I doubt there’s all that much that can happen in a Minecraft map holy but Jesus this guy really isn’t having a very good time up there is he poor guy must never have seen Mr Teddy

On his way in here that scared the ever living out of me oh my God what the hell is this how on Earth are there so many bodies whatever it is that happened here did a serious number on this town either that or this whole town was being run by a

Bunch of dream SMP watching Noobs check it out they even managed to get some of them stuck up on polls that are twice the size of me whatever it is that did this must be seriously powerful try looking around for some loot from the looks of things we are going to end up

Needing everything that we can get our hands on well unless we’re able to harvest organs from these guys I don’t see anything that I can actually loot around here maybe we just have to keep moving forward from here well it looks like this cave is the obvious place to start

Joe are you ready to get moving hang on a second Barack I got to take my afternoon swim if I’m going to be ready for this being basically Immortal is pretty tiring you know Joe you’re not Immortal just because you have the stupid teddy bear doesn’t mean that you

Are a literal God that might be what you think Donald but I am no longer burdened by the opinions of you mere mortals is this seriously the bit that we’re going to be going with all episode I’m sure that it will end up getting lost somewhere along the way Donald check it

Out though I got the key that we need for that big gate back there at least now we’re going to be getting out of this damn forest and actually getting ourselves inside some kind of house ooh wait for me Barack I want to be there when you open the door well you had

Better hurry up with whatever it is that you’re doing over here then Joe I’m not just going to sit around forever don’t you worry Barack I just want to take a quick look around the place before we leave it honestly doesn’t even really look like there is all that much left over

Here anyway all right well if you two libtards are done looking around here now then let’s get our asses into that mansion I might even try buying it from whoever it is that lives in there something tells me that he isn’t exactly going to be taking offers at the moment Donald

I reckon he’s going to be way more interested in our corpses than our money I’m sure that I can change his mind on that one I can give him enough money to buy an entire small Town’s worth of bodies oh there he is he going to see us or are we all good

Don’t make any noise what does it qualify as noise can I go jumping around in front of the window he doesn’t really seem to be noticing me at all well I guess let’s just go up there and ring the doorbell I’m sure that we can come to a solid business

Deal right here oh boy do you think he noticed us where’d he go his teeth are disgusting oh it’s telling us to run oh hell no I’m getting the flippity-frig out of here why are you guys so worried I haven’t even made my offer yet just keep running ah

I’m stuck in a cage ah I’m stuck in a hole ah I’m stuck between a Barack and a Joe Place what’s happening to us are we going to die why is everything going dark oh no everything is spinning oh we are so unbelievably boned oh my God he’s coming foreign

Are we dead I have absolutely no clue Joe everything sure does look black as hell that’s for damn sure is anyone going to make the obvious joke with that one or are we just going to leave it sitting there I don’t want to get canceled again

Donald wait what the hell is that noise are we getting taped to something right now Oh it sounds really scary guys are we sure that we want to be doing this that villager guy looks seriously creepy I don’t even want to know what he could be doing to us at the moment wait where the hell are we now this looks like some

Kind of cage why the hell didn’t he just kill us when he had us maybe he recognized the overwhelming business opportunity that I could bring although I must admit I haven’t had to use the whole locking someone in a cage negotiation tactic in quite some time it’s honestly a little extreme in this

Case I would have paid whatever he wanted for that place well it doesn’t seem to matter all that much now this guy seems about as proficient in making sturdy cages as he isn’t killing us oh please don’t go saying that Barack you might just jinx it for all of us

You saw what he did back in that Village right of course I did Joe but we have got something on our side that they must not have had beer well I would have it on my side if you two greedy bastards didn’t keep taking all of it before I could

Grab any that sounds like a skill issue don’t you think it is kind of hypocritical for you to call us greedy weren’t you also the one that enslaved me to a Cobble gen for like five straight episodes of Skyblock hold that thought Joe is this a electric

Chair oh ow it’s hurting me too oh my God there’s no shot that this guy put a functioning electric chair into this map as just a bit of set dressing now that is awesome oh you are so right Barack oh this thing hurts so good oh

For sake Joe why have you got to make it so weird I had better not see anything poking out of your pants after that guys you might want to come over here and see this that Villager has something seriously wrong with him what are you talking about Barack

You know that you shouldn’t be talking about people who look different like that personally I absolutely love my villagers to be big buff men who could easily hoist me over their shoulder and take me against my will that electric chair has seriously got Joe thinking in a different way at

The moment oh guys look these these are cameras if I stand on the pressure plate and click on the buttons then I can see all of the different rooms in the house what the is this Five Nights at Freddy’s keep looking through all of them Joe can you see the Villager with the

Up teeth anywhere no Barack not yet I’ll keep looking though he can’t have gone very far right this is his house after all unless there is some kind of secret basement in here oh wait I think I saw him yeah he’s in the corner of the

Living room let me see this oh yeah there he is okay so where’s the living room does anyone even know what floor it’s on why the are you asking me how the hell would I know any more than you do guys check it out I freed all of the villagers and now I

Can trade with them we can even buy some new clothes from them Joe what are you talking about these are just leather armor these are some of the most dog trades that I have ever seen oh that’s the living room down there if he’s still in the living room then we

Are going to have to be seriously careful if we want to head downstairs at all well what do we want to do now guys it kind of seems like the creepy villager guy is blocking our only way out of here why don’t you go down there

Joe I thought that with the teddy bear you were Invincible or something I thought that too Donald but then we got kidnapped and I’m not so sure anymore I thought that Mr Teddy would have stopped us from getting trapped so easily but he didn’t would you two shut up already

I’ll head down there Joe just stay on the cameras for me and let me know if he moves oh that’s him right there I guess if he’s staying right there then I can just head downstairs Joe make sure you keep an eye on him I don’t want to suddenly see him

Appearing next to me you got it Barack where is he again I can’t see him anywhere on the cameras Oh he’s disappeared I swear that he was right there just like two seconds ago where the could he have gone oh crap you’re telling me that he could be anywhere right now

Joe you’d better find him soon this is actually pretty tense down here I’m looking for him Barack I swear I can’t see him on any of the cameras maybe he’s in some of the cameras blind spots is anyone else getting some major hello neighbor style Vibes right now I

Get exactly what you mean Donald I think this map might honestly be doing the whole hello neighbor thing better than the actual hello neighbor not knowing where he is is honestly putting me right the on the edge of my seat I’m going to try coming down and help you guys search in person

I have absolutely no idea where he is just from using the cameras he has to be in some kind of blind spot somewhere all right well since we don’t know where he is then I’m just going to start sneaking through the house and taking wide Corners in case I see him

I think we’re looking for more of those valve things right yeah Barack yes we are if you see any then let me Well at least we were able to get our get out of the valves while Joe was getting mauled to death how many have we got to get before we can get the out of here I don’t have a clue Barack hopefully there aren’t going to be that many more

We’ve already had one death to that British teeth looking ass oh guys it was so awful I got sent straight back to the cage that we woke up in I feel violated in so many different ways Joe I literally do not think that it is possible for me to care

Any less about how you feel the only thing that I care about right now is getting the ever living out of here hold on a second Donald I want to try and see if I can get myself a little bit of extra armor before we go back down there and look

For more valves something tells me that I am going to need as much protection as is physically possible against that guy can anyone even see any more of those valves this house really isn’t that big you know what other places are there to check for more of these well there definitely

Doesn’t seem to be any more of them on this level I would say let’s go down and check out the lower levels again but I am pretty sure that the British guy is still down there don’t be such a wuss Barack how else are we supposed to make any

Progress if you two asshats are too scared to go and actually face that human dental floss commercial down there well I don’t exactly see you coming down here first Donald Ah Holy he’s so fast and that is why I wasn’t going down there first Barack a good businessman will never do

The risky work himself if he can get other people to do it for him that is called capitalism baby no Donald that is called being a goddamn hypocrite why don’t you go down there yourself if you’re willing to call other people wusses not in a million years Barack Joe

Why don’t you go down there instead I’m sure that there’s some ice cream down there wait do you really think so oh I could really do with having some ice cream right about now don’t listen to him Joe he’s just trying to get you to do all of his dirty work for him

Considering the fact that all of the barrels are just filled with bread and rotten flesh I highly doubt that there is actually going to be anything anywhere close to ice cream in this house why the are you telling him that Barack we could get him to go down there and face check it

All for us face check oh for God’s sake Donald have you been playing League of Legends again I thought that we talked about this you agreed that you would never touch that trash ass game ever again I can do whatever the I want Barack this is America you commie don’t you

Dare ever try to get me to stop something ever again I swear to God I will unleash all of the fury that my legal team has right onto your bank account didn’t your entire legal team quit Donald I’m not sure you have much of a legal Fury left I’m rich

Barack do you really think that I can’t still get top of the line lawyers that is fair actually you could probably get a lawyer to jump off of a bridge if you waved enough money in front of his face that is cool and all but what are we

Going to do about getting the hell out of here being in a house with a British guy is really putting me on edge you know my Irish ancestors are screaming at me at the moment to run like the wind just keep looking around Joe there has to be some more valves around here

Somewhere right oh I think that I just found one wait what’s it saying to be able to switch on the boiler you must open the six valves there’s six of them are you serious we’ve only found three of the damn things how the hell is there supposed to be three more well

This place seems like a pretty good place for there to be another one of those valve thingies it does look really dangerous here though where the hell even are you guys oh hold on a second Barack there’s three different switches here did anything just open up for you Barack

I just flipped all of them and got us another valve yeah Joe the attic just opened up I don’t see a whole lot of stuff other than a cake up here though we’ll keep looking around then we’ve still got a bunch more valves to open if

We want to get the hell out of here what the do you think I’m doing Donald just give me a second the crates up here are giving me a ton of fireworks if I can get my hands on a crossbow from any of these things then I’m going to be absolutely packing

For whenever that British decides to next show his face Barack if you get a gun in this map then you’re giving it right the to me there is no way that I’m letting some Kami have the only gun that is God’s Boomstick and I’m going to wield

It like the full-blooded American that I am suck my ass Donald this thing is mine now how about you get out of whatever cubby hole that you guys have gotten yourselves into and come help me find some more of these valves but there are so many cracks and crevices around here

Barack there has to be some kind of secret around here I can feel it in my Biden bone your Biden bone Joe are you off your meds again no Donald that’s just what I call myself I don’t want to know Joe no I promise that it is nothing bad Barack

It is just this little tingle that I get whenever I feel that something is strange Joe literally no one wants to hear about your wrinkly little tingle let’s just get the hell out of here already for all this talk about your old man spider sense there sure doesn’t seem to be absolutely

anything around here hold on a second guys I just found a wolf oh hell yeah now what am I going to call you little girl oh I think that I have got the perfect name Barack you should call him meat Shield because it’s only going to take dying to the

British guy one time and you won’t have a dog anymore oh my God sorry Donald but I really do not give a crap about what you have to say at the moment I might have just gotten the single most powerful item in the entire game oh hell yeah

Me and my trusty newstead is going to show that British what for well if you’re going to do it then could you please do it quickly he’s gatekeeping me at the moment and I’m not going to be able to go anywhere until he gets out of the way don’t you

Worry Joe when I catch up to him there’s going to be absolutely nothing that he can do to stop me what in the actual are you doing Barack there is no way in hell that you think that is actually going to do anything to stop him from absolutely murking you

Within seconds ye of little faith Donald I am honestly expecting him to just Keel over and die the moment that he sees something as glorious as this well you can be pretty damn sure that something is going to be dying when he sees you that’s for sure when that happens you

Might want to say some words of goodbye to your little piggy friend there though Barack wait Barack you’ve got a pig yeah I do he is absolutely glorious and I love him me and my mud loving little friend here are going to get us out of

Here in no time don’t you worry Joe this actually feels like I am in a call with two different versions of Joe right now this might actually just be my worst nightmare well you have fun with all of that suffering Donald in the meantime me and my little friend

Here are going to try searching for some more of those valves there should still be some areas that you guys opened up that we haven’t checked yet well can you guys hurry up please the British guy is keeping me trapped up here I’m looking Joe don’t worry

Oh I just found myself an emerald chest plate I’m not sure if that’s good at all but I’ll sure as hell take it over a leather one how many more valves do we even need to get surely we must nearly be done by this point I think that there is only one

More left what was the name for that last door that you opened maybe that could give us a clue as to wherever the we need to go I remember one being called the courtyard maybe there’s an outside area to the mansion somewhere that we can go and

Check out well that sounds like a solid enough plan for me let’s try and see if there is any kind of outside area that we can get to oh it’s literally right here well that was a hell of a lot easier than I thought

That it was going to be wait I can’t fit through the Gap while I’m on the pig uh I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do here I guess you’re going to have to go on without me Donald oh for sake Barack you’re seriously just going to

Let me go out here without any kind of backup just so that you can stay on your pig for the rest of this map yes can’t exactly argue with that Donald I can argue with it as much as I goddamn want you you’re lucky that it looks like I’ve

Already found the hut that has the valve in it wait why does it just end here already and what’s that clicking sound and why is my alarm ringing oh my God what the is that holy there’s two of them why is there two of them what the hell happened out there

It sounded like you got absolutely jumped on what happened was I got left for dead by some liberal so that he could stay on his pig and what the is that noise it’s the British guy Donald every single time you hit him he shrieks so loud that it makes you think that

Your eardrums are going to burst I can tell that Joe just don’t hit him again I think that this British might actually make me deaf if he doesn’t shut the hell up where even are you guys I can probably come up there and bait the guy away from you we’re right by

Where we broke out of the cage Barack please get here quick I’m not sure how much longer I can keep having this blasted directly into my eardrums before I have to live with tinnitus for the rest of my life I’m on my way Donald don’t worry

Me and my pink friend here are going to be there before you even know it oh you were just like my knight in shining armor Barack can you whisk me away to some far away land too don’t make it weird Joe I’m here to save you and that is as much

As you are going to be getting out of me well you’re saving us in a very weird way I’m dead while you’re just sitting over there on your damn Pig don’t you dare go disrespecting Sergeant piggy like that we’re doing you a favor here remember oh he’s on me

Sergeant piggy get out of the way oh I can already tell that this really isn’t going to be pretty Sergeant piggy no thank God that pig is finally dead sorry it had to be this way Barack but you were sounding so much like Joe that it was starting to seriously piss

Me off we have lost a truly good soldier on this day boys can we please get some salute emojis in the comments for my Fallen Friend he was like a brother to me and the whole world will be grieving to see him go rest in peace is Sergeant piggy that

Scene of your death will never leave my mind can you guys shut the up about the stupid Pig already I just want to get the out of this damn house we’ve got one last valve to open in the courtyards can we please just get back

Out there and find it I don’t think that I can help you at the moment Donald I am stuck in the Attic with the British guy and he doesn’t look like he’s going to be moving anytime soon I think that you guys are going to have to finish this map without me whatever

Joe I didn’t really even need you anyway Barack where the hell are you we got to get this valve from the courtyard remember I’m right by it Donald I just saw a little slit in the wall that I hadn’t seen before so I wanted to check it out all right well

Let’s just get out there then the sooner that we get out of this place the better it is honestly insane just how unwilling to strike a business deal that his guy has been it’s a shame too I probably would have paid this guy like 20 million

Dollars for this whole house what in the ever living was that thing that was the thing that ambushed me earlier Barack I’m running it in Loops just get in there while it’s distracted all right I’m going holy crap there’s another one of them holy there’s a third one

Well it sure does sound like you have got everything sorted out over there Barack I’m sure that you won’t mind in the slightest little bit if I just come on by and hit this switch over here while you deal with that whole situation you got going on over there

Don’t you worry Barack I completely believe in your capabilities as a fighter I have 100 trust in you that you are going to get out of that situation just fine funnily enough Donald I didn’t end up making it out of there all right at all at least we’ve gotten all of the valves

Done now at least hey [Applause] holy what just happened I heard an explosion is everything all right uh you guys might want to come and see this everyone get down to the basement I’m on my way Barack what in the actual is that why the hell is there a massive

Hole in the floor whoa that hole is massive what did you do Barack I just pressed that button up there and it made the floor explode I guess now we just have to go down here look there are some caged up skeletons over here oh that is seriously spooky

Barack wait why did this door just open and why is this Corridor completely empty what the what how is this a fever dream what in the actual name of America was that why were there so many weird looking ass people all just sitting around a dinner table under the British guy’s house I’m

Honestly not even sure if that can be explained with words uh I guess we just keep moving on from here then I kind of wish that we could have joined them to be completely honest that dinner party seems a hell of a lot more fun than having to fight for our

Lives against a British guy there’s a trap door over here there doesn’t seem to be a whole lot behind it I guess that’s where we’ve got to go next oh well that is just perfect instead of leaving this place we’re going to head even deeper into it

Whose idea was it to play this dumbass map anyway it was all of our idea remember complain about it all you want but I know that you are secretly having fun with this whole thing Barack the only time that I have had fun during this whole session was when I was able to

Watch you get mauled to death by two different Abominations at the same time what happened to us oh crap where did we teleport that was insane although I don’t remember half of the stuff that we did during this session how the heck can you already forget half

Of the session we’ve done sleepy Joe now I’m convinced that your goddamn brain is running with a specs of 128 GB of storage you have to delete some files bro ha ha so is that what the is the scientific explanation of having a dementia is like in Donald Trump’s own words

You are so smart that I want to smack and kiss you in the head at the same time guys where the hell are we again I just can’t navigate and do map Reading at this point I can’t seem to find the location on where we are right now wait

Let me test something to make sure wait what map are you talking about you got a whole ass map and you didn’t even inform us that you had one in your pocket the whole time you have to tell me so that I can take credit for it wait for me guys

Where did you go oh wait here you are hey hey I just gave you a little love tap to the bum Donald please don’t be mad at me and send a nuke my way we don’t want to start a world crisis bro you got to stop using the word we when

You’re talking and including my name in your conversation because I am the only one here who could possibly start a World War not you um boys word of advice this map doesn’t tell me our location it’s not the same as our normal World Minecraft maps this one is

Clearly a handmade drawing of a map so you guys better follow me or you’ll definitely be lost oh wait follow you why didn’t you say that earlier wait I’m hunting puffer fishes right now they look fun to shoot at for sure oh what was I supposed to do again oh right

Where the hell are you Barack I thought you were navigating the three of us to the next location Barack why the heck did you not tell us that it’s not the same as the world map in Minecraft you won’t be able to find us if you get

There first come back for me you can leave Joe of course it’s because you didn’t ask not my fault that you didn’t do that where the heck am I going right now wait I think I found it this place better be it what the hell did this switch do hell yeah

Ouch why the hell am I taking damage under the damn water that doesn’t even make sense there’s no mob no nothing this puffer fish must have bitten me while I was hiding you in my damn pants or you’re just dumb enough that you forgot how breathing works you have to

Hide yourself bro and wait for those bubbles to regain you can’t just dive all day long and expect to live you’re not Aquaman I love the fact that you have to Baby explain everything that you are talking about Donald to Sleepy Joe you are now a certified father figure of

Sleepy Joe anyways hurry up and stick with me uh Barack I don’t have a stick what am I supposed to do now that I can’t even stick with you this game sucks I can’t even do the thing that you guys have ordered me too this is just a

Load of bull crap yeah Joe yeah you don’t have to take everything literally Joe so shut the up before I shove a stick up your goddamn mouth with the nonsense you’re talking about why the hell am I back here where did I just go

Did I do a dumb Loop crap and don’t you dare do that Donald just try man you’ll be finding yourself in a locked up cell by the time you wake the freak up nah bro you would find yourself in Kim jong-un’s respective area when you wake up I just contacted you earlier

Where are you guys wait for me wait what I didn’t know that you could open these barrels right here I found some goodies and I uh kind of don’t like that idea Donald I would rather avoid political contact with other countries presidents right now thanks for the tip Joe I mean we

Couldn’t have figured that out without you but you really have to hurry up and follow us before you get lost it said that a valve opened now a sewer system opened we have to check it out yeah where the hell is that sewer place anyways where the heck are you right now

Barack and Joe be careful with your oxygen Don’t You Dare Forget how to breathe air this time or I will punch air into the right livers you have wait I have a liver I thought they were useless isn’t that the part of the human body that digests

All the ice cream that I eat every single day I mean no one loves ice creams as much as I do yeah that would be the most useless thing to love doing bro imagine getting the newspaper in the morning in your office in White House stating that congratulations Mr President for

Becoming number one in ice cream loving contests yeah and that’s not the only thing he loves I heard in the latest news that you had that you like kids sitting in your lap you must be one hell of a family-friendly guy sleepy Joe who the hell posted that because I’m

Going to be suing them although I can’t deny that I still love ice creams more than kids sitting on my lap I mean I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about so we’re just going to pretend that we didn’t hear that okay where the hell are we now guys where the

Heck are we even supposed to go holy what the hell is that we have to get out of here sleepy Joe watch out look behind you phew what the hell was that that was kind of creepy and by the way where the hell is Donald at I

Haven’t seen him since the ice age when he used his giat to split the entire iceberg in half I miss Prime Donald I think this game is rigged yeah clearly no other reasons for me being stuck back here and missing all of the exciting footage you got from the jump scares and

What Donald are you talking about Joe that is not me stop denying that bro it was clearly you you’re Donald Donald the beluga whale he had such a giat that everyone had to look back and do a double take on that thing it was amazing the Donald we have doesn’t even have a

Yacht maybe you’re just using an inflatable balloon every time you have to go up on stage just to get some eyes on you Donald ha ha anyways we have to get out of here I honestly don’t want to hear that from someone who laughs like they’re living like a some kind of

Royalty in a palace or a castle am I right Barack you sound so dumb bro not gonna lie peekaboo’s mother truckers did that really not scare you I was hiding for a while now and all of that went down the drain I don’t want to play this game no more

The sound is getting scarier and louder too crap instead of wasting your goddamn time and trying to scare us like a child Joe how about you press that button over there and become my human meat Shield I mean my useful bodyguard in the world I already did and I got a

Whatchamacall this sortie thingy right here it’s like a wooden sword but it looks cooler and starts with an end now they’re a tight sword another eye sword oh wait a netherite sword wait what what the hell did you do let me see this chest wow a bunch of bones but no

Netherride sword to be seen yeah yeah this chest is definitely not rigged or anything like the damn election this might be the first time Joe has gotten lucky in a horror map game we played I can’t believe that he got a netherride sword out of that chest if I had known

That I would have gotten it too is this sword really good then well hey he jokes on the two of you seems like you can’t be messing with me for a while now since this sword just gave me value making me more important than any of you and I

Like that idea even if you get a billion death the right swords Joe that won’t mean as much to how important I am as a person in this country I am the true lost and forgotten president of our graceful country and I will take that back enough with the beefing boys just

Hurry up and get down here and help me find the new area that we have to go to so that we can progress in this horror map already just watch out for jump scares is this what the heck you were talking about Barack are these mobs jump scares

Help me get down from here they’re camping down here and they won’t go away and die dumbass what the hell are you talking about Joe this are ravagers or big wild boars in real life I can’t believe that you’re dumb enough to not know what the hell we’re talking about here what the

Heck are they not taking any damage from my bow whatsoever how much HP does these guys have oh crap I have to get out of here help they have creepy faces I didn’t notice that till now help yeah now looking at it closely they do have creepy squidward-like faces how the hell

Am I supposed to get away from them I die if I go down there hell no I ain’t doing I’m staying up here that Donald get out of there one of them is chasing the out of you he wants that got oh I think I

Just saw you die in front of me get to higher grounds and shoot them from up there they’ll die no way they’re Immortal yeah no Barack he just rammed the living soul out of me they’re too overpowered why the hell are they not dying I don’t think we even got to

Kill one of them yet should I call Michelangelo to take them out or we could just use a drone strike and guns blazing the heck out of them right here right now no way they’d be living after that and I think I just found a new home

I might be staying here for the week guys we might be in the same position right now sleepy Joe my hands are getting numb from holding the keys on the keyboard just so I’d be staying up in this Vine that I’m on right now Donald kill these ravagers please what

The hell do you think I’ve been doing all this time Barack I can’t even remember how many arrows I’ve been wasting this entire time shooting the heck out of these ugly ass Squidward wait a minute they kind of look like Joe I am not taking that disrespect from you

Donald just wait till I get to you imma beat the out of you you know what I hope that they don’t die and they just keep killing you over and over again hell no where the hell are you right now Joe I’ma lead the horde of this ugly

Ravagers to your ass right now and let them do the beating you deserve let’s see how much you love these guys I can’t believe that we’re stuck in a section of a game just because a lot of ugly ravagers are trying to kill us can we just slip past this guys and

Assume that they never existed in the first place I feel like I’m Tarzan right now about to drop a huge ass drop kick to these ravagers on the top of these Vines I’m holding on to right now for my dear life not that I’m afraid to die no

Totally not I didn’t even notice you Donald I thought you were somewhere far away hiding in a corner didn’t know that my neighbor right here is Tarzan and not the orange clown that I see every day where the hell are you guys even right now I just can’t seem to find you I’m

Trailing a lot of blood right now and they might lead to the next area oh some ravagers are on this area though Donald you might want to get out of there because I think you just aggro this pigs up your ass they’re too much to handle just hide in the corner and

Wait for Barack to find the next area that sounds like a solidified sleepy Joe plan right there no cap wait I might be close to the next area oh wait I found a lever did that do something what opened an elevator where the heck am I supposed to find that ah

What the hell is happening oh wait never mind it’s just a cut scene whoa so that’s the elevator area I thought that was just a bunch of stairs this map is way too leveled up time to get out of here goodbye boys oh no no no

Like my human meat Shield bro just like how you’re supposed to do it the first time those ravages appeared I am the one who’s going to bait the out of you I’m already long gone boys shut the up and get your asses moving before I leave you behind if I find that elevator

No way am I waiting for you I’ve been doing everything around here uh guys ah please help me back here I’m stuck I need help they’re trying to pin me with two bores or whatever Squidward pigs you might call this thing I can’t get out please come back oh sounds like my plan

Is working this time just like how I envisioned it it was nice knowing and playing with Joe while it lasted I guess it’s time to Bid Farewell sayonara Amigos oh I just died yeah thanks for the help guys you are one of the truest friends that I

Have ever met in my entire life leaving me for themselves you sick bastards do that again and I’ll put you in Minecraft jail boys I found the exit elevator although it isn’t the elevator we expected because it’s just a bunch of ladders leading up but yeah come here so

That we can finally leave this place those guys have infinite health holy oh where the hell am I did I just get teleported few that actually saved me wait are you guys seeing what I’m seeing oh my god what is that get me out of here please please be

The end oh what do you mean please be the end sleepy Joe it’s just already the beginning of an end this is the chapter five now how many goddamn chapters does this map have can we please end it now wait what is this painting over here was this the guy that

Showed up during that time we were in a black room of space an infinite void please tell me he won’t suddenly show up here there’s text in this book that is in this stand over here wait a minute let me read it blah blah blah it has three pages

Seems like this is the lore of this horror map something more deeper must be happening in this house is this even the attic it said it was chapter five in the Attic right what the hell is this house how can they have ravagers and strange people live here this looks like

Donald’s messy room to me than it looking like the attic this isn’t the attic this is such a letdown oh wait the guy in the painting may hear me and beat the crap out of me I was just kidding this is nice haha please don’t hurt me

Looks like a lot of important details about the lore is inside this book I just read one page and it said that Victor became the most unexpected abominable man in his time we gotta watch out for this Victor guy bro that sounds threatening and some of the book pages have

Scribbles and glitched texts all over the place do I look like some kind of historians to you trying to decipher the hieroglyphics back in the day hell no if you’re talking about those texts that I had seen earlier then yeah I agree and what the hell is that fancy word that

You just said hieroglyphics to be honest that just looks like a noodle language to me I mean not that we expect you to find out what the hell were those texts all about sleepy Joe we knew you would say that and I’m going to contact Elon

Musk for you to get canceled on his new x-platform no no no please don’t do that I still have to keep my face after this after all since I’m the president you know oh wait what the why is this guy here is this a prison cell or something holy this guy is Victor

this is the guy that I told you guys earlier to never meet even once in your lifetime he got the most peak in his life he’s about to on us when he gets out of there what the so is this guy a bad guy we must bring

Him down if that’s the case he better not do anything to me and to you guys or I’ll have Mr bear beat him up which listen and read to what the hell he’s saying Joe pay some goddamn attention for God’s sakes who the hell should we stop he’s getting stronger every day who

The heck is it before he what wait I thought you were the one who become the most abominable person in this area don’t tell me that you made this goddamn monster that you’re talking about you better settle this yourself he said that he made a poison that must work because he’s a doctor

I mean we still can’t trust that until it’s proven to be effective so why don’t you take a sip of that Donald and we’ll see the results afterwards how about you shut the up and do that yourself verify that poison that he made by yourself you better close your mouth

Before I close it for you oh hell no I ain’t drinking especially if it’s coming from this crazed doctor right here the poison maker look at how terrified and up this guy looks one sip on that and I’ll surely go to heaven threatens aside boys we have to

Find a way and do what we need to do so that bibal won’t start a terrible or even get a chance to lay its hands on us at least that’s what he said its name was bibal I wonder who the hell he’s referring to the ball might be a close

Relative of his or some what if he conducted experiments on that poor guy and he became what he is now oh that would be so sad holy I think we’re talking to the ball right now what the hell did you do to Victor we’re about to smash the hell out of you

If you don’t stop that we’re about to deal with you right now what the hell do you mean that we’re late I didn’t know I had to be on time bro no one told me that at this hour it would be late that is just so unfair though I’ve always

Been late to all of my classes ever since grade school that doesn’t even make sense because there are no classes during the goddamn Ice Age now you’re just telling lies sleepy Joe and we know that you are haha your statements don’t coincide uh just shut the up bro and I use my eyes

To read this time and I finally realize that his name it says Behemoth what the is a behemoth bro this is Bad News Bears and what the hell are you gonna do with the poison I can’t believe that he just laughed us off like that

This guy’s must be on another level to be this confident in taking those words or he might just be bluffing and he’s his pants right now this guy must be a true psychopath just listen to what he’s saying in chat this is way getting creepy this guy is even creepier

Than sleepy Joe over here and that would actually mean that it’s really bad hey shut the up and actually use me in some good examples have you forgotten that I am the President of this graceful country and I can sue you with the power vested upon me you don’t want that to

Happen how about y’all shut the up before I beat the out of you guys with the fists vested upon me he’s about to make us do something bad I bet shit’s about to get real over here why the hell is he so obsessed with the damn poison that Dr Victoria or Victor Malay

Or Dr Victory something made for him does he want to drink it so bad that he can’t wait for that to happen no dumbass of course he wants it so that he can take it from us and hide it for the rest of his life he will be Cutting

Loose Ends if he gets that oh Victor we have to get Victor back I’ll exploit him with Jeff bozos is getting real boys this is getting hyped than usual I wonder what this Behemoth looks like he must be really really scary if that’s the case this might finally give me some Shivers

How the hell is he doing this does he have some kind of magic powers or something wait don’t tell me that they’re a magician what the hell is going on I don’t want to fight magicians they’re cool but this is scary wait I changed my mind wait he’s actually

Trying to prove a point here of course my species will reign Superior on all of you I am a human and thus that would mean that they wouldn’t be a lower species than you because I am the greatest hey shut the up Donald and just listen to what he is saying it’s

The back story for his villain Ark and bro you really have to stop talking as if you own Mankind and they owe you something because we don’t whoa so is that the reason for all of this hate that you have to show us be ball

What the did we even do to you can you please just let me go home already I want some ice cream so bad holy uh boys I think something bad is going to happen it says gas in the Middle top corner of our screen is he going to

Use some poisonous gas on us is this guy for real we don’t have any hazmat suits or gas masks is that for real and I I kind of got a map and it says where to and where to not go is this related to how we’re

About to get out of this situation because uh I kind of have it and I don’t know how to read it well I’m not so sure about that because I think mine increased a bit before I have this map to navigate me where and where

Not to go but I kind of forgot where I am right now so I might be done for it please help me I think we found the room that we had to navigate Joe turns out we didn’t need that map of yours to get through here but we kind of

Need the poison that you have if Donald doesn’t have it what poison poison don’t tell me it all relies on this damn goofy ass to save the day hurry up and find a sleepy Joe or we’re all going to be dead in less than a minute oh wait I

Have it I’m trying to find you guys ah I found Victor instead of you guys can somebody please tell me where the to go I think I shat myself right now what the I need help he’s shooting me there you are Joe close that

Damn door and hurry up and put that poison bottle inside we need that to defeat the ball oh I think he awakened instead we’re in for a big trouble boys ready up your voices for intense screaming oh hell yeah take that damn poison alive that’s what you get for messing

With my race for humans take the L today that Humanity takes the W again better luck next time uh how what the is wrong with you Donald hurry up boys and help me find the next area we need to go to we might be fighting bball sooner or

Later so stay vigilant and agile even if he decides to come out in the middle of nowhere I got him no cap I’ll one tap the crap out of him with this crossbow that’s already been locked and loaded don’t try me boy okay wait Donald let me

Hide behind you since you made those strong proclamations that you can actually defeat him then you should definitely go and do that I don’t want nothing to do with that guy please let me go home already oh what the hell is going on who the hell turned the

Lights off over here what the is wrong with you show yourself oh no let us out of here you how did you do that holy boys this is actually looking kind of pretty bad ah help me please let me out b-ball I’ll even go as far as to sharing some of my

Ice creams with you just so that you would let me live down creepy is weird those were the ravagers earlier that tried to eat us don’t tell me that all of them are a family because I don’t want anyone’s family looking like that they’re hella ugly looks like we got lucky boys

I am so thankful that those iron walls dropped around us I was sure that it was the end of the three of us phew we need to get out of here fast wait wait wait Joe that’s not the ice cream man near your neighborhood who the

Hell is this giant guy he looks so creepy is this guy a son of Victor’s holy crap I don’t want to offend you or anything but I don’t want anything to do with you ah crap I think I shot myself again no way that guy wasn’t our neighborhood’s best ice cream seller he

Totally fooled the out of me he was part of that scary weird people’s faces family just stay vigilant Joe and don’t trust anything in anyone you see around this place we have to hurry up and get out of here just stick together and we’ll be able to figure this out

This isn’t good as much as blood I want to see around Joe’s areas this doesn’t look right something must be lurking around this place we’re trapped again if you try to jump me off 360 MLG the out of you hear me why the hell do these people have this iron traps around their

Damn houses waiting for some unwanted Intruders yeah you scared the out of me Victor what the hell happened to you slow down Victor what the hell happened let us out and tell us what the happened so that we can piece this out and possibly solve this all together

Where’s b ball what happened holy are the truckers and the mothers what the is that ah oh my God this is actually scary what the hell happened to you Victor I don’t want anything to do with this anymore I knew I shouldn’t have trusted

That guy he was the person that we saw in those screw you Victor oh no this was a bad idea trusting you was a bad idea I knew something was off about you from the moment you were locked inside that prison cell you were such a waste of

Time wait a minute what’s going on did the doorway to Heaven open up Ellie is that his daughter hurry up and go to your daughter Victor and stop trying to kill us I don’t want an MLG 360 the out of you he’s gone did he really go to

Heaven I don’t understand what the is going on in this place all I know is that I want some ice creams and I want to get the hell out of here something still isn’t right save your goddamn ice creams for later sleepy Joe you don’t

Have to stand that close to the bars no ice cream serving is going to come out of there please tell me that it’s over oh my God the doors open hurry what the hell is going on are we out yet are we finally free please tell me that it’s

Finally over no more please no more wait I think this might be it we might have gotten out of the place this is the narration of the map that we played this is the villain story of bball the behemoth we’re about to find out what happens next so basically babal

The Behemoth was the hypocrite of this story it’s like trying to tell that your friend has a bad smell but not knowing that you too had a bad smell am I right sleepy Joe you really should take a bath sometime yeah how about you really should just shut the up and

Not say anything if you have nothing good to say I know this is just a part of your strategy to make me look bad for the next upcoming election the freaking End that was a good run we made it out alive in that horror mansion that who knows

Who brought ourselves into that thing we get to see the sunset this is one good way for a horror map to end I didn’t even expect that ending part that actually got me peaked it had me on the edge of my five hundred thousand dollars gaming chair that was

The time that it had the most use for me is this finally the end thank God I don’t want anything more than that it’s about time it ended because I want my ice cream breakfast Mills and all the way to deserts to it becoming a snack every after five minutes shove all of

That ice cream down your throat sleepy Joe one day you’re going to regret doing that and you’d say to yourself that you wish you just used that time instead of eating to go to the gym and start lifting you can’t even tell me that Donald I know you eat a lot too who

Knows how many pizzas you ate today and how much chick fell a you ordered and especially the fries that you always get from McDonald’s for your own information and for your own good Joe I do lift a lot from time to time I go to the

Goddamn gym and hit off and try to lose some calories I ate a monster eating ice cream lover like you oh yeah try and convince me that dumb ass I know that you ain’t going to the goddamn gym and worst of all why the hell would you even

Consider your kitchen as the gym do you count the times you’re chewing your food as reps oh who the hell let sleepy Joe Cook you just got lit on fire Donald I better be calling the ambulance right now because someone is burning from all those roasts

You took bro haha oh just shut the up Joe I hope you choke on those ice creams you eat every day and you stub your toe and by the way this map was actually really good this must have the Donald gamer approved logo after this session oh wait it’s not over where the

Hell are we oh wait never mind I think we’re back to the main menu of the lobby this was a really fun run although I forgot what the heck we played already and what I did the past hour but hell yeah this map was good but I could have

Done better I mean no one can top me on being the greatest person alive in this whole universe we can’t do anything about that they’re up against me wait a minute guys there’s nothing here on this corner of the area no character That actually gave me a heart attack that’s it I’m out of here I can’t believe Barack actually fell for a Minecraft jump scare haha goodbye boys haha yeah never actually expected that to happen and we finally got to see it goodbye boy make sure to subscribe to our Channel president Multiverse or I

Will build a wall around your house as well thanks Donald are you threatening people again shut up or I will nuke you as well