Press Start To Laugh – Friend or Foe? | What if Steve Talked in Minecraft? (Parody) – Season 2 Episode 2

Oh i’ve been waiting for this for a long time 15 years spent training for this moment that’s great before you commence with the stabbing though i have some questions who are you why do you want to kill me and what did i do to you you

Know what you did no i really don’t i can think of a few things no one asked you what dammit no i wasn’t talking i mean please i’ve done nothing whoa so killing my grandfather was nothing was he nothing to you what i never killed a oh

Um who’s your grandfather exactly he was just a wandering traitor who tried to help you oh boy well how do you know i killed him it could have been bandits or creepers or an overenthusiastic cow he told me everything about you oh this’ll be fun the demons in your head check how you

Left him stranded on an island double check and that if he didn’t help you you’d go insane and destroy the world his description of you matched the stories of that hideous monster who lived in the haunted cube oh for the love i thought you were dead well technically

Then suddenly i hear about a similar looking man burning down villages all over the world i tried tracking him down but his movements were too random i decided to head to the old cube just to check and who should i find along the way but you you expect me to believe

That’s a coincidence yes cool stabbing time ah wait wait wait wait wait wait don’t i at least get to know my killer’s name fine alex okay alex i know what it looks like but i’m not that guy i didn’t kill your grandfather feel free to explain i’ll practice my stabbing well um

He is in fact my evil twin really you’re about to die and that’s the best you can come up with you’ve gotta admit even for the truth that sounds pretty lazy yeah but it’s true yeah well truth is i’m stabbing you now with e a little help here oh fine hello

What the friggity frack yeah so there’s a bit of truth to the stories you have a demon in your head uh yeah i call him witty the wither wait the wither wither see she gets it you can call him witty he doesn’t mind how dare you

You have the wither in your head not on purpose trust me well that’s rude oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god i love you what now listen here dragon excuse me uh my supreme scaly empress better with more feeling next time and

Maybe throw the word beautiful in there regretting my decision more and more hey being in your head isn’t exactly a vacation for me either lesser steve stop calling me that i will when it stops being true anyway yeah we’ve been walking for days now how much further is

This place we’re going well we’d be there by now if your giant metal puppy wasn’t running around killing every animal in sight i’m not killing them we’re playing tag it’s either take a break and let him play every few hours or have him whining the whole way why

Are you keeping the walking lightning rod around again well i would melt him down but he’s surprisingly effective at inadvertent killing tag here oh i squished it did another sheepy weepy who else wants to play fine but just a few more minutes run start wrapping it up we’ve got a world

To destroy and we’re not going to do it one sheep at a time now tell me where we’re going i had my followers hide something for me we’re going to collect it and what will this thing do exactly it should give whatever stupid thing you create next

The power you’re looking for why didn’t you bring this up earlier instead of sending me out for all those other worthless items because i was saving for a special occasion really what it’s mine i’m allowed to have things you don’t own me tag you’re oh i did it again

Stop tagging them with your feet can we please get going okay ron time to go but i don’t wanna run no you get over here right now young man fine great now he’s gonna pout the rest of the way i’m not you’re pouting stop or i’m taking this caravan home you

Can’t make me you’re not my real dad of course i’m not i made you in a lab rabbit in my don’t you wow now that was evil even for me yeah fine let’s calm him down before he rust himself And then when you destroyed that village because they sacrificed a non-virgin to you oh that was great yeah you know i didn’t have to do that i don’t actually need a sacrifice at all i just thought i’d better make an example of them couldn’t have people thinking i

Was going soft well yeah of course although that did kind of cut down on the number of my followers it’s okay you didn’t need those wannabes oh what about when you ate the pegasus that was hilarious yes eating an animal to extinction always a hoot do you want to

Know what they taste like oh gosh yes rainbows really i can just imagine that which you’ll have to considering rainbows don’t have a taste oh they do i bet they do of course they do so why haven’t i seen you before you should have joined my followers

Oh i did but your one remaining follower was a bit bitey that sounds like barbara i think she might also be rabid probably can we back up a second what okay there’s that why exactly are you so buddy buddy with an actual demon who has killed hundreds of thousands

Does it matter if you’re going to praise me for my accomplishments at least get them right i wasn’t praising sounded like praise to me why exactly are you so buddy-buddy with an actual demon who has killed thousands thank you you’re welcome thousands of people when you were ready to stab me because i

Inadvertently killed one my grandfather yes and i’m very sorry for that but as woody and i explained i wasn’t in control oh i got it but the sword was in your hand and after we finally kill this hero hero you’ll get yours looking forward to it but that doesn’t explain your

Fascination with witty after my grandpa died i searched for any possible way to bring him back to life i found a book that talked about the wither a supernatural being with the ability to bring people back from the dead i don’t like to brag but yeah i began to worship

You hoping that if i were a good follower you would resurrect him for me i guess you could say i became a bit obsessed oh there’s no such thing as too obsessed with me great we found the one person who loves witty as much as he

Does hate to put a pin into whatever the hell this is but we’re here Oh good lord it’s so much worse than i imagined this one’s a keeper not an architect look at it it’s all broken and decayed you are the house i hate you both so much so this is where we’re going to set up why not extreme embarrassment by association that’s a

Valid point you’ll live but what kind of life and technically i’m not alive so now come on it’s already built plus i have a hidden stash of equipment here upside with those stories i spread no one should bother us here good point if you think it’ll make a good base of

Operations then i’m on board mr the wither sir oh good lord please call me really all right with e really what i allow those that i like and you to call me witty everyone else can call me the wither emperor of darkness the three-headed horror the creature from

The black legume don’t you mean lagoon no ghost of the nether breaker of the world scourging the pegasus or mr skeleton head you forgot tamer of the dragon i did didn’t you say you had some equipment here yep i hid some stuff down here oh clever well thank you i assume he

Came up with the idea it does sound like me doesn’t it it sure does it wasn’t like i did this while you and indy were sleeping and slowly driving me insane no that sounds like me holy crap weapons armor tools materials perhaps you’re not completely worthless

Thank you oh diamonds i feel so fancy really yeah don’t read too much into it now i’m just going to be stabbing you with a diamond sword oh yeah it’ll be a fancy death come on stabby mcstab grab some tools we’ve got some rebuilding to do

Are we there yet i hope so i’m freezing my tickets off you didn’t tell me i needed to dress in layers sorry i wasn’t aware i was traveling with a baby who needed a jacket the moment it got a little nippy nippy it’s below freezing

The only thing nippy about it is that my nipples are about to fall off i was kind of hoping you’d lose a few limbs to frostbite but nipples will do if i do i’m taking away part of your share of the planet 10 per nipple oh we can just

Change our deal like that huh i wasn’t aware well we can so you better keep yourself in line good to know hey i see a thingy in the thingy a building in the distance uh i meant a goat on the mountain but now that you mention it i do see a thingy in

A thingy that’s it finally stupid dragon i thought you were going to kill us on this journey for that snide comment i now get 60 of the world when we take it over what that wasn’t the deal i am altering the deal pray i don’t alter it

Further no you cannot just alter the deal on a whim going back on your word now i get seventy percent yeah stupid dragon and calling me keep it up i’m gonna own 100 by lunch at this rate i really need to look at the terms of this deal it might be best if

You two let me do the talking could i stop you if i tried only if you kill yourself lesser steve you’re back down to 60 worth it ron you should probably stay here why are you embarrassed by me do i shame you yes good call i’m gonna go back and say hi

To that goat hey goat he’s gonna kill that goat yeah now remember just let me do the talk two goes there bow down and swear fealty to our scaly empress for she speweth the flames of life upon us all really the flames of life you dare speak out against our empress filthy heathen

Told you’ll let me talk you gonna help nope you know those leaves burn people alive there’s nothing of life about them those flames cleanse the non-believers of their flesh prisons of course they do he’s not wrong if you do not bow down and beg for forgiveness at once i will

Be forced to fill you with her flames in the form of my arrows i’ve already had to fill in some holes this week so i’ll pass lemming assistance please dragon or i’m docking you ten percent fine halt minion my scaly empress is it really you yeah it’s me are you sure

How do i know this isn’t some imposter trick please stop talking whatever your name is it is you we thought you lost or perhaps still locked in throws of passion yeah no just mildly inconvenienced as i can see trapped inside yet another hideous human creature oh come on he is hideous

Isn’t he back to 50 still worth it but that’s okay this shell and i have come to an agreement and i need access to the cube the cube lady are you sure you said the evil within it should never be released again from the sake of the world do you question me

No no by empress we shall grant you access immediately good now throw yourself off a cliff for your insolence of course my empress right right away holy crap i run a tight ship around here can’t have people questioning me sometimes i just make them do it to prove their loyalty impressive boss

I killed the goat my ship has leaks but if this cube is as powerful as he said things should finally go my way oh it is i hoped to never release this evil again but what must be done must be done it’s in the box there oh you have

Some impressive stuff in here don’t go getting handsy we’re only here for the cube the rest is still mine fine here it is and you’re sure this will help me create the greatest evil in the universe yep never mind it’s not dead just horribly wounded i’m bringing him home i

Said no pets he’s not a pet he’s part of the family your ship is at the bottom of the ocean how much longer is this going to take we’ve got a lot to do before we’re going to be ready this is always the worst part ah there another tree down

Alex how many have you done counting this one sure none what i’m working my ass off over here what have you been doing stabbing practice can’t be too prepared she’s not wrong we told you stabbing doesn’t work on hero i have to reabsorb him i know i’m planning on stabbing you

After you slurp him up or whatever huh will stabbing you still work after that uh no probably whose side are you on with e all it takes is some light ego stroking and you turn your back on me nope sounds about right keep in mind alex you kill

Me you kill with e oh with he couldn’t you just transfer over to me instead i don’t have enough power fine what do you need me for you could put that stab into work and go hunt us some food that i can do gonna go stabbing me some animals animals gonna

Go stabbing me some animals to eat okay i know we need all the help we can get but at this point i’d rather just let barbara help and deal with the biting what’s wrong with alex well she wants to kill me and i kind of thought the murderous

Intent was enough to sell my point if you remember most of us wanted you dead when we first met you i kind of assumed that was a common thing for you it’s not but you have a point you know she does worship you couldn’t you maybe tell her to just not kill me

That really doesn’t sound like me now doesn’t that look better no what’s wrong with it size shape consistency what the physical realm is so uncomfortable you should really look into more ethereal materials uh-huh well we’ve got a base now with e what’s next we’re gonna need some

Potions and enchantments then we need to track down hero i never was the best potion maker and tracking hero has been pretty difficult don’t worry i have an expert in both of those fields who the hell hello hello hello barbara thanks for coming i burped my forest down called it you me

What about me oh hello who are you you don’t remember me you bit me you’re gonna have to be more specific i want that piece of my shoulder back oh you’re that stringy girl why you only attract the stringy ones i’m not stringy i haven’t gotten a

Sample yet come here ah with e she’s getting biting again [Applause] is it gonna hurt can you even feel pain only emotionally oh then most definitely extreme hurt okay then glad to help cut me open doc we don’t have to cut you open i just open your chest panel but

You told me to stop doing that because you kept putting dirt in there i was trying to grow flowers now what do i do with this just put it in his chest and it should do the trick uh just stand back i don’t know what’s going to happen afterwards okay ron

Are you ready to become the most evil weapon in the universe sure doodle well hold still here we go ah what the hell it tickles did it did it work huh there are other people in here with me and it’s not the squirrel what howdy howdy howdy where are we a

Shindig a hoot nanny they’re fishies well howdy big guy who is that hero hey there silly boy how you been what that box was supposed to contain the greatest evil known to the universe oh it does spend a day with them you’ll see andy that you

I just knew you couldn’t stay away from me y’all want some tea or something i’d love some what have i done here you’re gonna have to be voice i’m gonna go back and say hi to that goat hey god had it heidi the hell was that