New Minecraft Roleplay: Welcome Cannon Fodder!

All right so you’re a you’re you’re creative person I believe am I right am I right yeah yeah am I believe in your you’re creative person why should I hire you all right all right all right you’re going to have to listen to me right here right right now all right all

Right do not look do not look behind you know you do not look to the window I see you looking I see you trying no no no you’re a really big nose sir you look me straight in the eyes right now you look me straight in the eyes uhhuh what’s one

Plus one listen I get it you’re here to apply to be an unpaid intern m an unpaid intern two what’s four plus4 hey because I’m so creative and I feel like I could be the best ever I’m in our whole area in this whole area

I could be I’m the best you ever made have you ever made a PowerPoint slide in your life I have i’ I made so many that’s a lot of experience you have that’s really good that’s really really good I made so many what’s 10 plus 10 fny anyways so

Basically what we’re going to be doing with you for most of the time is we’re going to be having you running around mostly just you know doing General work for people you know it’ll be fine second question how do you deal with pumpkins they’re okay um pumpkin how do you deal with

Them or how do you well well I feel like that also warrants an answer how do you deal with pumpkin how do I deal with pumpkin then yeah yeah what are your what are your opinions on pumpkin rights they pumpkins should have so many rights um more than they have now yeah

Yeah president go you should vote pumpkin are you are you are you sure about that opin like are you 100% sure about that opinion yeah yeah that’s good so that’s the initiative we need to he okay yeah you look like you’re good on your legs you good on your legs yeah as

Long as I don’t like my last sh yeah you better be [ __ ] athletic for this one why do you think you’re more qualified than everybody else out there I mean I mean that one the blue that one really you know that they probably be just as good as you are what you’re

Trying to do well because they’re losers they obviously are not creative I’ve made so many power points I have so much experience but they don’t even understand All right all right right right that’s a you know to write you down for that one uh okay oh well don’t worry cuz if I tell if I tell you to run through the Sahara Desert to get me a Starbucks coffee I better have that [ __ ] by new

Go to the desert you get Starbuck me to me what’s 14+ 14 48 damn he’s good honestly I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be doing here I kind of cheated wrote those numbers on my hand uh I barely know how to do math all right now I would like to ask if I were to ask you how the hell would you sell

Me this sword H if I was looking for a weapon to murder how would you sell that to me this is the number one sword ever it was used for so many murders before even even the world’s greatest murder used it it’s so sharp it can even cut through the hardest sound his

Name um world’s greatest murder what’s his name John miloff as I said in my application my name is John miloff I heard something about some lady brought my name up I don’t know how she would know me I’ve never killed anyone yeah you know I had my doubts when

Starting company you know just you can’t you can’t patent carpets like so I had to I had to like sell off my my brothers and sisters and you know like to some weird guy from like from like like uh I think it was Scotland yeah and then I

Had to like I had to put my parents into bankruptcy this you know like just I had I had to do a lot of things to get this company running people people keep telling me that I got to that I got to like you know that can’t patent carpets and I’m

Just like no like I came up with the idea of a carpet you know you get me you came up with the idea of carpets yeah yeah I know how old are you just I came up with the idea it’s just like nobody gives me credit for it and you know just

Like I I don’t know like then some guy comes along and says that that you can’t like like that you can’t like uh take like take like um you know you can’t copyright an entire concept of like rugs and carpets and like yeah I don’t think

You can do that and I’m like well that’s ridiculous I already did it um okay well story aside you’re gonna eat this cookie don’t touch the Cookie do not touch it a you going to eat those cookies don’t don’t touch it how do I feel about this job you know kind of

Good you know maybe I don’t know boss kind of he says he makes carpets I don’t believe him just to let the record show all right now you’re a you’re a really good lawyer I’ve been hearing I’ve been hearing from like from from banana and rules uh Johnson and

Carlson yeah yeah yeah toes like just every law for every law firm in the world wants you and that that that you know that makes you incredibly son after ignore the pumpkin with the computer over your head um what oh hi you’re going to eat the bread I

Brought from home can I touch that no uh drop that on the plant on your way out wow can’t have anything yeah yeah uh swe your qualifications again uh I’m very good at being good yes Yes uh does this TV work it’s not turning on yo can we get the maintenance guy in here is there a main hold on what’s your opinion on pumpkin rats I didn’t even know PP pumpkin people existed yeah that’s the problem the problem is not going to get you very far

In this office Junior it’s not going to get you very far I mean they don’t look that different from us it should be fine right yeah it should be fine should be fine why are you still here what do you mean get up get up go get go I back tomorrow back tomorrow

Bye all right if you’re not here if you’re not here you’re fired oh okay we’re really good at our jobs all right Yeti guys see the TV’s not turning on when I want to go home wait are you crying this go look at this he crying he

Crying go look at this that was going to look at me bro what happened the heck are you cry why are you baby baby was your interview that bad what a [ __ ] loser yo man we just playing anyway the TV is still broken so like you could come take a look

At all right you’re fired oh what’s your opinion on pumpkin rights rights wait is that a is that a pumpkin cuz I love Caron Pumpkins I’m still a person yeah you’re hired just don’t ever enter my office ever again all right bet man thanks man that guy didn’t seem like a murderer at

All yeah I don’t know what their big deal about pumpkin RS were but I do love to carve me some pumpkins I’m kidding you’re hired anyways well welcome good to have you on here good good to have it’s nice to you know anyways last question uh what’s what is

Your opinion on the on the on carpets you know carpets carpets generally yeah they’re okay they could be more bazaz but you know you better get a higher opinion of carpets or else we’re gonna have a real big problem all right all right I’ll get i’ll get a higher opinion big

Problem you could trust me anyways good to have you here come back um Bean will validate get out of here okay Right all these losers I know nothing about carpets I I I’m not even creative I kind of just made up whatever popped into my head kind of said I was just the best that’s it that was my whole plan to get this job I don’t even care about pumpkins I

Just wanted to get the job and I felt threatened Bean what do you think huh what’s your opinion Jesus Christ what is your opin on pumpkin rights on pumpkin right what never I never knew the issue until now but a very big issue in Mississippi oh well they’re equal to us well

Obviously that’s how I feel about the right they should be having same rights as us what’s your name Kier it’s a strange name yeah else here uh because I actually Jam that’s interesting Indeed if I was to if I was to lay a stack of um various items in front of you you think you’d be able to count those items yes I I’m pretty sure I would you know he’s really sounding more qualified than the other guys who

Brought to do this man it’s just it’s insane smart any any Any yeah now you you you have a lot of qualifications I believe you’ve been successful on about about all your cases I believe I have a 2% success rate I’m the best a 200% success rate yeah yeah that yeah freaking flawless I mean honestly there’s no

Reason that we wouldn’t hire you I mean you are just the smartest lawyer that would ever come into M thank you thank you yeah why why should I hire you for this particular job uh well I’m very passionate you could say about accounting and I can count 1 2 3 4 and

Five I think that makes me very qualified also I’m really good with numbers dude in Spanish right here now God he’s good I I know Gary it’s honestly it’s terrifying skynight is in front of us oh God okay anyways okay let me let me let me let me conven

Quick I don’t know I don’t know think I have a way on how to make it fun for myself yeah some of these people look very dumb I don’t know man he just he’s something off about him yeah I mean he looks really weird look at him look

Looks Bey eyes sure you know I can play a few tricks numbers yeah numers the Numbers in case that wasn’t enough I actually have a book of of of references ah book of referen you know yeah yeah I can work with that yeah yeah book of references uh she is a great lawyer uh layer layer M Le layer totally reliable source

Tells me that I mean I’m toally honestly I’m glad that I get it from a totally sour mhm uh super nice also from a reliable source I mean a reliable source I mean it’s a different reliable source because it’s not the totally reliable source it’s reliable but you know I think I

Trust it hey hey maybe keep a good grip there you may drop it I’m goingon sit I’m sitting beside you um oh okay now uh we got a amazing individual from the famous Source wow that’s honestly that’s the most credible Source yet that’s crazy yeah that’s crazy crazy reliable source uh needs to

Clean her room I mean your mother obviously that one’s not supposed to be in there I thought I honestly this is why you’re the best lawyer of all time OB yeah yeah obvious it’s because you also care about your mother L important quality I think my mom went through my

Room before I left today because that that that Mom that was not in there beforehand so well yeah you’re just you’re just the most reliable lawyer there is absolutely no flaws in hiring you at all uh you’re just totally going to be able to solve all my legal problems cuz you are

Totally a lawyer yes I just I just don’t know uh can I get what get the cookie that’s on the table you touch that cookie you die you have four more on the back there and you touch that cook you die anyways you’re hired I don’t know if I want to beat you

Know what welcome to the company I’m sure you you’ll be incredibly happy here I’m I’m so happy you’re accepting this position MH what are your opinions on pumpkin rights they don’t have rights and they never will you’re hired great I’m leaving you have no rights I hate that Guy I [ __ ] hate Pumpkins yeah no that John milkov person is a little terrifying they said they wanted a car pumpkins that’s just bad juju we can’t be having that that’s little um other people they’re a little weird not going to lie man just want to go home with my pumpkin family what what was

That Holy and it just it worked out I’m just saying starting a company on a on a basis of Fraud and Liars are you still doing interviews uh I mean you kind of missed the the interview I mean uh you want alcohol I a bunch of it beer anything do you got lemon

Juice yes now listen I I understand that you’ve had history with various different charity organizations absolutely how did that particularly feel well I’m a very you know generous person um I give out all kinds of stuff uh at my at my old job I was mixologist

You know I always like gave out free drinks and stuff so I’m I’m I think I’m a pretty generous person what is your opinion on pumpkin rights you know they’re all right good good answer answer yeah if I were to ask you to take your

Shoes off and run on glass would you be able to do that I mean my left leg is numb from being stabbed 27 times so possibly yeah anyway so can I what can I expect from you what’s your um uh what is your opinion on workplace politics huh workplace

Politics yeah I believe all people should be treated equally no matter their position um and if someone throws a punch then therefore someone else can throw a punch back so what you’re saying is equal rights equal fights exactly I I like the sound of that yeah that’s a better way to put it

You’re hired great I can’t wait to start my first day at um um carpet’s Incorporated great and I can’t wait to start my job as a uh as a what human resources what that is uh thank you for your time uh I should probably run from

The police now was so many of my hours you’re welcome I hate your guts you too oh so I just talked to them like what which I at why was I late oh um so yeah I was late um I was in a bar fight fight I just got

Fired from my job yeah and uh I saw that there was a big for higher sign and I just ran by yeah is that is that good is that