Schlatt caught CHEATING on our minecraft server 🙁

Hey everybody welcome back to the Goon SMP it’s me good we’re back on the Minecraft server for the sleep deprived podcast we’ve got nopafi today wow I got four sticks he’s got four sticks and I’m wow why why do I have access to all this this is irresponsible yeah I’ll

Just I’m gonna need those four sticks I’ll just hold on to those thanks all right we’re back with day three of our Minecraft server and we know we’re still at spawn and none of them no progress zero progress every time I get any items you kill me uh listen I’m the newcomer

Here can I just get a rundown on the lore like what yeah so so basically the way I want you to think of this notify is um uh I want I want you to think yeah I want you to think of like hey guys what’s up yeah I’m back I want you

To think of um hey guys [Applause] it’s me playing yeah yeah wow that’s something huh hey nope watch this nope if I want you to think of um like the saying the rich get richer so basically what has happened here yeah yeah schlatt has accrued a bunch of

Wealth and now he’s using his wealth to like make impressive laws so that we can’t like get to this level are you I’m sorry are you looking at me I was just I thought we were welcome in SMP is this an initiation I don’t know what this is actually I don’t

Know what they’re doing they left an opening dig down right there oh these [ __ ] idiots are [ __ ] stupid all right so I mean what what is our goal tonight voice uh let’s craft this guy knows what he’s talking about yeah hello it’s me Jeb today no features to Minecraft we add snow

That you fall through that’s cool very handsome Bear swag lead death swim svalbard and develop this one here’s what we need to do we need to find something that’s not a [ __ ] Tiger Biome can we get the hell out of here what what seat is this whose seat is this is this

No they made the swedes made the whole world cold I’m I’m pretty sure when I started this world I use the seed [ __ ] part that’s personal seeds Yes we made the [ __ ] fart oh finances having a bit of a hiccup need to contact CFO Joseph Magnuson we gotta contact Magnus Carlson and play

Some jazz need to consult with Bjorn Phoenix um he developed this game our new Dev Felix Jones hi everyone today I am the new Dev hired for this card I am this is Leon has some good ideas he’s going to add a new kind of tree to the game my

Name is a new block no my name is Leon yogartson I am at 40 calories per cup with about the 12 grams of yes we thought that the best way to get you nerds to go to the gym was to bring the gym to Minecraft we have a plant-based protein we have a

Whey-based protein yes yes guys guys let’s take this seriously all right we gotta find okay can we find another biome besides tiger my God I think there’s mid so many Swedish people listening to this are like I don’t sound like that yes [Laughter] Coming in with a great username change let me tell you something what if we got rid of all the numbers and then made you get numbers in your username that would fix everything I reckon I think that’s a great idea how do you like Dobby the elf what the [ __ ] is this dude

GPS I felt like I felt like a [ __ ] polar cap with like a bunch of pigs on it there’s a [ __ ] ton of pigs oh my God it’s a [ __ ] pig episode one it’s a [ __ ] ton of pigs and cows dude come here oh my God this is where it be at Aid

Literally everything in the in the world to us I’m gonna get a doggy foreign I’ll go [ __ ] [ __ ] myself [ __ ] you ew don’t kill the dog man hey hey [ __ ] oh my God hey so what do you guys do do you guys have like lore or anything like

Do we have like characters you know am I like a [ __ ] king of a castle or some [ __ ] I should have a cat oh yeah we should all have a cat wait turn it out time out panda where’s the cat that was following me [ __ ] killed my cat man I did not kill

Yourself remember you killed your cat wait it’s right here is it isn’t this your cat my cat no that one doesn’t have a collar but I would really like that cat please oh he got a new cat you got a new cat it’s fine you know hey Mika

I really want that man I really want this cat you don’t understand I need no I need this cat well pushy does to a guy don’t you dare hey [ __ ] you I’m killing it I’m killing you you didn’t don’t kill the cat dude you didn’t don’t kill the [ __ ] cat

That’s effed up what the [ __ ] oh my freak listen I didn’t kill it but you didn’t earn this thing it is an illegitimate child stop hitting my kids don’t eggs at it you [ __ ] this cat up Don’t Kill the dude okay I didn’t think it would do that I

Didn’t think it would do did you kill the cat flat I’m trying to be one of those like britishers episode we have to make sure we have to we have to act like we actually care oh does that grouping of pixels what did you do dude I actually did care about the cat

Man oh yeah you’re gonna cry you’re gonna cry mate dude you guys are being so mean to me and after everything I did for Minecraft you do this I added in protein supplements I added in GNC collaboration Moss carpet you kill my cat I added Mercedes-Benz GLA to the game

I I partnered with Gucci and Versace huh I add Mercedes with ambient lighting to game you play me like this I’m not gonna lie Mercedes-Benz ambient lighting is [ __ ] sick so hard how long people hate on like the new S-Class despite oh is it an RPG RGB gaming keyboard oh my God

Oh my God they’re making cars shitty and RGB to con oh it looks like a disco dude I have a tiny penis that wasn’t part of the thing man that’s new Jeb lore put that in the wiki add that as a splash screen in Minecraft in the menu Jeb has a tiny penis

Can you add a Mercedes-Benz mod to this uh server just to make it a little bit more flashy yeah because this is the capitalist SMP I’d love the mybach s s580 i I felt like I was losing my mind when I drove that car for the first time

Yeah and then I go I know dude you know it turns around when he starts talking he’s so animated and I go on Tick Tock and I S and I see some [ __ ] like 15 year old being like people don’t care about class anymore they just care about these crappy these crap pieces

Never [ __ ] been in one my God you have no idea isn’t it wasn’t that just [ __ ] crazy boys you know what one of my pet peeves is is when you rest your your wrist on the on the steering wheel of the Maybach and then like the Rolex like scratches the

Leather a little bit [Applause] it really gets on my [ __ ] nut sacks you know what I mean dude can I tell you this one thing that I really hate yeah of course I I was putting gold flakes in my ice cream and like uh I put in too

Much and it just started tasting like gold and it was just too much that just happened the other day is the gold yeah the gold is close to like it’s not supposed to taste like gold that’s when you know you added yeah it’s gold exactly yeah I had too much on

It it’s just for the visuals you know for the visuals you’re not gonna believe this I I had to go to my dentist dude my uh my my diamond teeth veneers they started like chipping okay time out that’s that sucks why the [ __ ] is there a crafting table right we’ve been

Walking for 20 minutes yeah dude I know it’s it’s uh back to the topic of you know the whole gold flakes and all that [ __ ] um recently I had a I had a bit of a bit of a fiasco you know like how like the [ __ ] my bog has like the champagne

Fridge in the in the back seats I know exactly yeah yeah dude let me guess let me guess what the problem was they you you got it and they were the flutes were gone both of the glass fridge the glass fruits they were missing they were missing it didn’t come

With a complimentary bottle of champagne either I bet did you know that my Rolls-Royce did not come with a chauffeur dude what are you serious I had to hire one myself man really that didn’t happen with me dude you’re four that’s not what’s supposed to happen no you’re some kind of poor action

Dude went to the the dollar store Rolls Royce Jesus wow okay here’s the thing we are walking straight past another another incidentally the same [ __ ] biome how are we walking past the same place I’m gonna teleport US 10 000 blocks away are you ready 3 000 there we go 70.

Area man come on let’s hope we end up in the Beverly Hills right now I’m talking about 3 000 negative 10 500 70 bucks a year I hope we don’t start suffocating ready oh [ __ ] we’re gonna die yep here we go But hey we are not in the snowy biome anymore boys we’re in the Hills you guys want to set up shop here yeah we could set up here this seems like not next to the 40 [ __ ] zombies did you guys see that though the [ __ ] like there’s

Like a zombie virus like in California no way it’s called liberalism [Laughter] they look like it like I zoomed into your face like you flew into my camera you were on my find my you shared your location with me for like about it about like six months ago and I’ve just seen

You on my map ever since oh that’s weird because I don’t know who you are actually I’ve never met you in my life hi I’m jab I I run myself lead developer I love when you walk over snow and you start sinking and you can’t do anything

About it that’s so fun uh I have confession big big idea from Marcus Marcus Marcus he still works Marcus and still works there texted me he was did anyone come big idea so yes Hans uh Luther uh we gotta start making a base you know uh

Asterisk do you mind if I post up next to you man go for it man hey just so you know we get kind of funky in here late at night basically we get together and we goon oh we got our Goonies oh it’s just like a partying term you haven’t

Heard of it okay we like sit down we kind of you know take off our clothing oh okay oh look I I think it’s walking away I think I’m gonna go yeah okay what do you think of my house I built this flat what do you think of this really

You made this yeah I made this whole house that’s great man Empty chest fun piece of gravel oh yes one piece of gravel the one piece you found the one piece I got one piece you know if somebody invades my property I got one piece right here cool guy that’s what you’re saying one piece yeah yeah one piece you know I hug people

When they made my property oh nice man you’re a nice guy I feel a lot safer with you around you actually mean it I do you know knowing you have the one piece knowing that I could like knock on your door to like ask you for a favor as

A neighbor and you could like Blow Me Away with one of course of course I got one in the chamber for everybody you know there’s room for everyone there’s a trend going on in on Tick Tock in the United Kingdom where little kids will just film themselves walking into other

People’s houses and uh I was just thinking about what would happen over here they walk in they’re like oh hey Bob I mean before they even finish oi I think uh certain kind of responses Remington Model 870. um differently in Texas we do yeah yeah we do do things differently it’s

Like The Tick Tock voice saw these kids in my house not to you a Glock 17 with switch today just bought Benelli m1014. yeah what do you guys get on your for you Pages let’s [ __ ] out this [ __ ] right now I get a lot of I got one piece

Set it’s because it’s great hello yeah what you’re here man you’re here it’s my first day it’s my first day on the S P guys can we just get an Applause for for being my first day I guess I mean this is you know everyone that goes on goon

SMP Dies at the End are you guys serious this is a one and done it’s funny because your ticket to the [ __ ] Chocolate Factory huh all right I open Tick Tock and the first thing I see is a dude driving a Miata but instead of the steering wheel it’s a Tim

Oh yeah I know those [ __ ] videos man right now I get a lot of space content honestly and I’ve been getting this guy who comes on and he like explains about his like dolphin language and he made a whole like phonetic dolphin language it’s awesome is that the guy who [ __ ]

The dolphin no no he just comes on and he’s like hey oh he [ __ ] the dolphin no dude he he actually like taught me how to say like I swim towards a a boat or something in Dolphin it’s like there’s also like people who like like

They set up like buttons and like they make like sounds like sentences for like dogs oh yeah oh I’ve seen that I’ve seen that too I think I saw some people were like disproving that or like you’re telling me bunny the dog can’t speak English dude it’s like all those [ __ ] bunny

Videos are like the the dog hits a button and it goes bunny and then it hits another one like a another [ __ ] random button and it says like why in the honor the honor is like bunny why it’s questioning its existence did you gain sentience buddy did you get

Is this what you’re talking about and then it’s like [ __ ] yeah I’m getting a treat and then just [ __ ] presses yeah the dog gets treats and so it remembers [ __ ] Scooby Snack the whole time it’s the only thing that’s in the dog’s mind Astro let me introduce you to my new pet

Man oh Jesus come see my new pet this is Bubba come see Bubba you know I I’ll check Bubba house later no yeah he looks really cool I just have a lot going on open I’m just gonna keep that okay maybe we can get along um do I pet it yeah

Okay oh Jesus is that how it is this is how I greet it yeah it doesn’t mating ritual and Sweden oh mating ritual yeah I don’t want to have sex with your pet I have another one if you want to see me really yeah oh that one’s sounds really normal

Did you get that at PetSmart oh wow look at this [ __ ] house dude look at this this is like a there’s like a four thousand dollar apartment in New York why is there [ __ ] golems in my house what’s going on I don’t have the red dude oh it’s it’s the beginning of the

Month yeah but it has been one hour so we’re shutting off your heat and water listen I I I’m single I have a I have a son okay you can’t just kick us out please well does the Sun have money no the sun is [ __ ] four then welcome to the streets

Oh I’m hungry I’ve got food for you come over here I’m fishing are you fishing into a dirt ground I see water on my screen are you [ __ ] with me no dude I’m not that’s actually dirt there’s water on my screen no he’s easy yeah had an accident recently and just have been

The same just treat them a little bit more respect and kindness okay no fight can you get his medication oh yeah I’ll I’ll just get them I just get the normal pills let me just get the normal pills oh the normal pills yeah that’ll help okay I thought I found

Them I found them look look this is this is uh these are Tic Tacs yeah these are Tic Tacs just eat them off yeah enjoy them enjoy them buddy yeah you just need two a day that’s not my age oh [ __ ] was it good for you help you

Really need to take it easy man you’re not that age anymore um that was the loudest inhale I’ve ever heard you could really hear like my [ __ ] sinuses or something sinus Tech tips dude science they are sick but you know what also is sick wallet

Well what do we do now guys is this the end of the Minecraft SMP is this album belief yeah I mean we haven’t made any [ __ ] progress in any of these let’s let’s build something I made a house I’m making a house I think we get let’s make

A group get rid of this server I think we get rid of it unless we make some lore in the dream s p they pretended to be to care about like music discs in quackity SMP they pretend to care about eggs it’s like what can we care about in

Sleep deprived SMP that we don’t actually care about beetroot seeds Beet Root seeds oh my God yeah I got them in my hand right now where are those Xannies at dude [ __ ] focus on here’s the thing when I was on my biggest s PS I would always

Have other people write my act for me so like either either we do it or like we we get submissions on our subreddit and then they write the script for us and we act it out I actually like that idea on Wattpad gets uh actually made what do

You think about that make me cool though make me cool and sexy and hot make him a cuck no make me really hot uh so can you can you guys please uh read in in uh order well I need some beetroot seeds gee willikers I know where to find some

A panda that’s your it’s your line it’s your life it’s your alarm right now I’m just gonna sit in the corner and watch you guys do you want this job son okay give me that quivering beetroot seed that’s not what it does can we keep that

Take two could you please put in a little bit more emotion just a little bit more emotion you know act like it’s the end of the world that you you know you need the quivering beetroot seeds oh okay yeah yeah I got you guys yeah yeah give me those quick repeat root seeds

Too much Miko what the [ __ ] happened to your cats wait what do you mean did you name them oh Xanax no my little Xanax those are nice [Applause] dude I was gonna name my cats name your cat Ritalin why did you name my cats for me why did you name your cats after medication What’s your deal man hold on Mickey is this commentary on how over medicated we are in the United States because that is honestly biting

Commentary and I love it I did it I didn’t make my cast that is crazy this cat was just born out of the womb on Ritalin already my goodness wow this just speaks volumes about how over medicated we are as a society I mean isn’t watching porn in general just

Being a cook I mean if you really think about it did we moved on from that topic like hours ago Dude you don’t have to justify it it’s fine oh it’s pseudoephedrine just want to bite into it you know I just need two or three of those in both forms

Yeah I’m gonna start for you man you gotta oh cool yeah yeah check it out read the name you are a w human being well I gotta give it back because you’re awesome well number five it’s um it’s time do the honors man huh what happened here’s the [ __ ] sword cuck sword

Oh right oh Mika Mika what happened yeah yeah it’s fine it’s fine uh I would just like to make my final words you know hold on let me come back it’s the miracle of life isn’t that beautiful yeah wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait

Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait I just want to say I just want to say uh thank you guys for the make a wish you know I know you guys only had an hour I’m gonna die soon here so I appreciate it really yeah we went 20 minutes over

Buddy so just uh oh Astro you [ __ ] [ __ ] I should have I should have used it on Drake I should have used the makers [ __ ] you man Mika I have bad news I think uh I think Adderall may have been slain what by who Astro hit him in the crossfire dude if I

Wasn’t lagging right now I would actually kill you oh hold on adderall’s right here man Adderall is fine now do you want do you want to get rid of Zoloft I can’t because I can you know I can take him if you want you can take Zoloft I’ve got I’ve got a

Few cats already you know whoever wants Zoloft I think could no I took him I took care of him wait I thought you meant like you would just like adopt him join us next time everybody on sleep no wait laughs