Vanilla Man plays Vanilla Minecraft

Oh i am here the minecraft man has arrived why is my name toasted now why are you calling me toast man i do like toast to be fair yeah i could go for toast i have eaten a lot of bread today though okay so this is what i spawned into

And then i was like i looked here and i was like instantly i stopped here and i went i think i should just quit because i don’t like jungles so i was gonna delete it but then i turned here and i was like wait what the hell is this thing ruined

Portal is that all it is what’s this is this obsidian it’s crying obsidian why are you sad obsidian i’m punching it that’s probably not gonna help sorry i’m not gonna comforting people oh i see a horsey i’m loving this world already it has everything that i need

Oh my god the amount of pigs oh my god it’s the promised land is that a cavern i have been blessed by this world and i was even thinking at the start i was like will i look up seeds and like try and get a good seed so we can do

Some cool stuff but i think i got an amazing seed all by myself i am so happy with this don’t place the obsidian yeah i probably shouldn’t be digging with that out it’s really a bad idea you know i do it like it’s so in character for me to do that i

Love the start off of minecraft probably love it too much because a lot of the time when i play minecraft i like get bored after a while i just like i just want to start again can’t you like make obsidian by putting like lava on water or whatnot couldn’t we do that

Got that new cave update that’s coming looks [ __ ] awesome i actually thought it was out and that’s what got me into thinking about minecraft but at last it was not meant to be the bank thank you very much for this um sub and i was just on autopilot there i just

Mined some iron with a wooden pickaxe i like how i look over to the chat because it’s delayed and then i just see all the stuff no stop this is a nice camming world it’s just it’s gonna be so stress-free because i’ve got everything i need

Right on me oof i hurt myself the amount of iron i have when we kept going for ages i’m gonna have a full suit of iron armor before you can click your fingers i’m gonna be all over the place [Laughter] it’s just like i may as well continue

This trend and the thing is i was like looking at the screen and pretending i didn’t know this and i could see the chat just going everyone’s just complaining i think just out here somewhere is the the best thing i like the idea of just being surrounded by all these useful things

Some people call them animals be prepared for me to build a house that you are completely unhappy with a meat house just making a house out of meat to show dominance to the animals i like that a lot oh you should be making minecraft mods what are you doing here hey guys

Made a new meat mod for minecraft hope you enjoy it the feedback is appreciated i know i’m kind of wasting my axe here but i kind of want to upgrade to an iron one soon anyway so it’s fine i collected a lot of iron with my wood pickaxe so

I should be fine oh me love minecraft i’m just relaxing oh god how can i get up it’s stressing me out oh this is fantastic yeah let’s build it here in the bay i like this why did i build here it’s like so off centered you know what that’s fine because the

Proper house will go over there hello housemate quick quick don’t let him escape him and block him no no no you bastard all right that’s fine i didn’t want you as a roommate anyway i’m more of a lone wolf and wolves eat sheep did i just hear a

Skeleton burning maybe he’s just walking i don’t know it is getting kind of lame hey come on dude that’s my lawn i you know what let’s jazz it up a little yeah look at that slightly different tone almost indistinguishable but that’s fine it looks so good come here neighbor reno as is tradition

In this neighborhood we shear our new neighbors sword sword good sword good yes my inventory is already a [ __ ] state now i block a gold there and with the rest of my valuables like the [ __ ] chest of a serial killer just such well just raw meat and egg

A block of gold some rotten flesh i thought i could hear them outside but i guess they’re underground oh god you know what that means subsidence if there’s caves underneath my [ __ ] house and look how grand my house is like that’s the size of it is gonna need some

Serious foundations to support it this is a disaster all right i’m gonna try and make it easy on myself and i’m gonna try and turn this into a farm this feels like it’s gonna be more trouble than it’s worth but i’m gonna try to make this into a farm so i don’t

Have to do the water part of it i don’t know if this is smart or stupid but i guess we’re about to find out this roll we’ll just boom boom boom this is not a bad idea it’s not one of my worst ideas to be fair but ah would you look at that

Oil it almost sings the sun is setting in a little bear we got some planted should i just keep looking for seed do you need to use a hole to increase the chance i’m going to keep going and waste my entire hole before i can get the answer from you because the stream

Is delayed i can feel your anger already chat don’t worry stop wasting durability no my stream i do what i want just start throwing away all my tools i think i could finish off this farm have like a proper industry going oh sheep welcome to the industrial age

The conveyor belts will be up in a second and they’ll be asked to step on you know what this seed is great and these seeds are great this world is fantastic am i having a blast i’m here hitting virtual grass and i’m just like wow gaming is great me love game you should

Tame a parent in the jungle i was looking at them all right i was thinking that geez they look like a kevin parrot you know but um i can’t remember how to tame them seeds well best get collected come here you [ __ ] come on come on love me please yes ah oh yes

Love me please this is the only way i know how to make friends feeding them seeds just ask max max folded after like three seeds come on he ran away i don’t know where he went please dude he was up there a second ago and oh it’s

Not a video i can’t just edit it out damn it yep whistle away he wants to be loyal i killed his brother i did i did is that what happens to us if we stop lobbying look let’s not talk about it where’s the ravine i’ve lost it how how the hell can you

Lose a ravine oh oh jesus one more jump and i was like goner i thought there was blood on my head there for a second it looked like [ __ ] blunt trauma to the head all right i’m gonna build a tower here name the parrot blunt trauma okay i i

Like that name yeah i support it um how do i get down blunt catch me oh stupid bird come here he knows to fly away when i show rage i don’t have that many torches oh my god no a child oh wait no it’s just a zombie oh phew

All right i’ll just lock you down there forever hey i just locked your child away in a box you have no way of getting them back hey thank you for the [ __ ] yeah children are very scary who knows what they’re up to did you know that babies are born without kneecaps like

Who does that as a mother of four-year-old child i can confirm that children are terrifying thank you it was just me throwing out baseless accusations but uh i’m sure you backed me up with the fact that babies don’t have kneecaps because i’m like 50 sure that’s true i know i threw it

Out there like it was fact they have kneecaps made of cartilage losers they’re so stupid why would they choose to do that the heaviest baby to ever ever be born was weighing 22 pounds and eight ounces what’s he up to now that would be a good conversation starter did you know i was

The heaviest baby ever born it’s like okay where do we take this conversation you forgot the parrot he’s at the top of the mine shaft i don’t i’m completely lost though i’m just trying to get back up please don’t be night time please don’t be my attention yes huzzah

Where the hell am i now bees ron i don’t know if they even attack on site or not but i’m getting out of here it looks like the most innocent thing i have ever seen in my life and i just start screaming and run away they look so cute they’re friendly okay good

Then i should go kill them let’s try for a roommate goddammit one day someone will want to live with me hello do you want to live with me come on in go in if you want to live with me go in it hurts to be rejected like that you

Know it really does oh i can’t wait for that farm to be grown jesus it’ll be lovely gang absolutely lovely you’ll you’ll you’ll be amazed oh we’ll be growing wheat weed sure why not it’s legalized in minecraft isn’t it weed there’s my parrot pulls out sword yeah

Yeah i probably should be more careful he’s seen some stuff you know he’s traumatized let’s get out of here come on blunt let’s go blunt their name is blunt yeah the the parrot’s name is blunt but not because of like the devil’s lettuce it’s just because its full name is blunt trauma so

We call her blunt for short i can see why it’s confusing all right you okay there parrot that sounded a bit rough now we know why his name is blunt trauma because he’s screaming i mean he’s seen some [ __ ] did you see what he went through earlier like

He watched his brother die in front of his own eyes he has ptsd he wakes up screaming all the time right this lava will be mine yes oh my god this game just called me hot stuff is this game hitting on me this is someone desperate for attention

Just like oh i can’t believe it blunt had to sleep outside well he [ __ ] screams all through the night it’s his own fault just get over it jesus it’s been two days the poor parent all right so we need to get rid of this is it no look up

But yeah no we’re gonna put this here so this one’s going to go there but we need to get rid of this you need diamond i’m pretty sure you can destroy it with iron i just i because you need diamond to pick it up all right i’m going to do it

I’m going to do it and risk you all getting angry at me when it goes entirely wrong okay it’s only got one crying so here we go I don’t think it’ll take that long 17 weeks to destroy it i’m going to go against the grain here and say no it won’t take 17 weeks you’re not ready for the nether oh trust me i know i just want to take a look at it because apparently there’s been another

Update five business days okay five business days goes fast so i place here yes okay okay i was really worried so we back in the mine oh that legitimately hurts so i hope that was worth the time all right buddy blunt you wait here blunt is high as his fact

At just like whoa look at this it’s gorgeous look at this look at that look at those what the hell is that thing that looks disgusting it’s like on some weird warthog pig what’s that a child run run i gotta get back to my world oh no kneecaps in sight oh jesus

All right blunt i’m back i know this must be scary for you i would like to get a bit of a farm set up how do you make fences again let’s see can i only make that much i can’t okay yeah i can make six it might have

To be a little bigger than that do i have any more voice it’s gonna be mixed matched fences oh people are gonna love this this won’t make people angry at all wow that looks nice god i’m upsetting everyone oh dear there you go folks enjoy your interbreeding i’ll be in the shack

God if anyone was watching what my guy has been up to since he arrived in this world they’d be extremely worried i think they’d just take him out i can hear screaming okay i might take a quick look in them in a boat before we finish up oh my god that noise

I gotta sort out what’s in my basement also in minecraft i should look at my basement and see what’s what’s going on down there i think the one thing oh dolphin let me kill it come here the chat wants you dead i just saw them writing it i wouldn’t kill you

But the chat wants you dead sorry guys i wouldn’t kill it normally but there’s so many of you are just bloodthirsty i’m gonna need a fish right how do i get out how do i get out what have i done did he just sit in my he’s sitting in my

Boat that is so great you guys want him dead yeah let’s kill kill kill kill was that a dolphin not good with that wait that didn’t sound good what the hell was that oh [ __ ] off oh go affect yourself you bastard go away go away you try and kill one dolphin

And he gets all high and mighty huh you take this take it take it take the [ __ ] fish go away you bastard not you to go away you look at him he’s looking at me all right dolphin dolphin oh jesus christ the accuracy on that man

Oh my god what was that he destroyed my boat i bet he [ __ ] 360 why wide ladder stalled me and everything let me feed you god damn it yes he ate it now i wait no he didn’t he just hit it alone he’s not oh no oh no oh no

I heard heard bad man leaving i’m going away dolphin will talk again another time i’m going back to the house if you want to meet on my turf then feel free i’ll meet you at the the militarized zone in my shack that’s a place of peace oh no my house is surrounded

[ __ ] rough neighborhood all of a sudden oh my god he’s got a shovel dude really i don’t need a gardener go away i don’t even have a garden go away oh my god i hate this neighborhood that was eventful the damn neighbors bringing down the shack prices yeah the property value

Plummeted and look it was pretty pretty god-awful to begin with oh an enderman he’s throwing harpoons at me can you see him he’s in the water over there he’s still throwing them dude what is your deal honestly i know i said to me to my house if you

Want to negotiate but i didn’t mean it body language god how how far did he travel to come attack me [ __ ] off never leaving the house ever again i’m done thank you very much for watching some highlights from my streams they’re all recorded over at twitch.tv

Slash call me kevin you can find the link in the description and my main channel is over there too thanks again for watching and i hope to see you next time