INSANE Minecraft FAILS – MUST WATCH!!

Minecraft the famous survival Sandbox game where you build massive intricate structures craft interesting items to improve your gameplay and commit various crimes including burglary hijacking murder arson and blatant Terrorism Minecraft was created by the most Swedish man to ever exist hello and also made swed and somewhat relevant in the world you’ve probably at least heard of this game even if you’re a tiny baby boy or an average Florida resident even if you somehow haven’t heard of this

Game don’t worry it’s your lucky day with the help of this totally tubular video commentary guide even you can game like the pros so I present to you dear viewer the worst guide to Minecraft ever oh wait that’s a typo I meant to say best I meant to say best I meant to

Say huh what the oh well time to game actually before we start the game we need to answer an important question how how do you actually beat Minecraft well it’s simple really first you got to get a bunch of diamonds and turn those into some tools then you got to get a bunch

Of obsidian make a big Square light it on fire and then it’ll make a portal to the nether go to the nether kill a bunch of these floaty guys steal their rods crush them into a fine powder then find a bunch of Ender Pearls and combine them

With said powder to make Eyes of Ender from there just find a stronghold locate the end portal travel to the end and fight a giant lizard pretty simple right okay we’ve got it all laid out so now we can actually start the game everyone knows that the first thing you need to

Do in Minecraft is to make like a Brazilian Logging company and destroy the entire ecosystem instead of being government funded however we instead of the power of our big blocky fists once we’ve desecrated the forest let’s make use of our new found Resources by turning the wood into planks and those

Planks into a crafting table with the crafting table we can turn more of the planks into sticks and those sticks into some tools and using these new tools we can turn this cow here into a triple Whopper no lettuce no onion no tomato no bread Whopper whoer whoer Whopper looks

Like we found our next Target for beating the Earth you know I always hated the Earth even though it’s what I’m standing on but hey look we have a bunch of stun so now that we have all these funny rocks we got to turn them into better stuff so let’s go back to

The crafting table and funny sheep I buried 6 ft deep wow what a funny sheep you know what else is funny how 0% of you guys are subscribed legitimately none of you are subscribed right now not one so uh maybe do that if you want yeah okay cool back to the

Video so now we can make upgrades for our Axe and pickaxe as well as a sword and an ancient microwave that we can use to make our meat not have parasites night has now fallen and we need to be careful who knows what kinds of googly gogs will come ACR oh there’s

A skeleton right there let me just just quietly kill him real quick great now my outfit is rude whatever shall I wear to the block ball now so anyways now there’s a bunch of monsters talking about I don’t think my rock tools do do much so we better stay

Away from them for now oh look a little spider let me stomp on it real quick I’ve made a grave mistake I decided to take a look inside of a pirate ship I found earlier it probably has some good loot in it let me just take all this

Stuff here using the iron we got from that ship we’ll go ahead and upgrade our tools to actual tools it’s time to explore wao dude look at the wfire we must be in California oh wow a cave it’s got a ton of coal here too we’ll go

Ahead and grab a lot of coal since we’re here so we don’t have to burn all our old tools to cook food oh cool a pit I wonder what’s down here oh hello there oh no it hits to me just like my ex-wife Sandra looks like we’ve stumbled into a Cave System here

We can find a bunch of resources such as iron so now we don’t have to steal from random pirate ships I went ahead and crafted some new drip to wear now all the ladies will want me right heading deeper into the caves we find even weirder rocks and minerals that probably

Don’t exist in the real world like who’s ever heard of gold before that crap’s fake oh God bro I found the soup a little earlier let me give it a taste test all right I think we’ve got everything that we needed from down here so it’s

Time to head back to the surface oh jeez this is going to take forever for me to dig my way back up if only there’s a way I could get up there faster huh this works now that we’ve successfully completed our first mining trip I’ve realized something we’re

Pretty much homeless so let’s change that this looks like the perfect spot to start H I’m kind of sick of beef let’s try some bacon ah perfect hopefully Peeta doesn’t hear about This oh I guess God heard about it and he didn’t like it too much well that was fun time to go sleepy night night ah what a great day time to build our house speed Runner Style all right our house is looking pretty good so far we just need to add some doors to it I’ll put this one right there that one oh not there put it here yeah perfect ah home sweet home can’t wait to be able to pay my mortgage

With all the mine coins I get it’s time to go mining for some diamonds for now we don’t need to get too many diamonds since I only want to upgrade my tools okay now that we have enough it’s time to head back to the surface to do some

Crafting back at the house we craft a diamond pickaxe which lets us mine almost anything in the game and a diamond sword which will let us turn anything we want into shepherd’s pie I found an abandoned nether portal in the ocean so let’s go take all the obsidian there I’ll just

Grab that yeah mining this stuff takes takes a long time we finally got the materials to make a nether portal so it’s time to head back home well before we can get down to doing that looks like we got some home Intruders to deal with

Come here you son of a trucker I’ll kill you right here let me stab you with my big old sword yeah that’s right who your blood tastes for hey so this is post editing uh skew uh just so you know I decided to put a bunch of Goofy cartoon

Noes over this segment because I thought it was too boring I hope you enjoy it any to me right now I’m got it I got to who gave you the right to explode at me I’m going to kill you for shooting me too uh I support the Second Amendment but not

When you do it oh man what happened last night why is there a crater in my front lawn and why do I only taste barbecue sauce and gunpowder so now that the slaughter is finished it’s time for us to start using our new materials to craft some stuff

Such as flint and steel for a fire source and a funny book table that makes our tools even stronger all you need to use it is some lapis lazle and some funny green balls called experience they’re not important trust me on this we’re also going to need this gold

Helmet to deal with some stuff that we might find in the nether all right time to build a nether portal here we go all right perfect looks okay all right now just got to light it up yeah there okay perfect all right I finished using the

Rest of my potions so now we can actually head to the nether all right BL do weekend two huh oh what oh it’s so hot here oh my God uh uh where am I here in the nether also called jaham in my favorite book the Quran there are a bunch of of weird little goobers like this guy he should be easy for me to kill though oh oh God he’s spting to four oh my God I’ve seen this before the terrain

Here sucks too it’s hot as heck and there’s smog everywhere I feel like an average resident of Los Angeles right now skill issue somehow they have some nice Forest here too and the pig residents here are usually pretty nice unless you’re not wearing gold oh what

Is that thing oh Mama Mia that that’s a spicy meatball oh hey a pig hello little piggy oh bad piggy bad piggy bad Piggies download Bad Piggies on the app store today please do it it’ll save my life somehow please all right just got to get across this pool of

Lava okay there we go oh God it burns oh my god oh okay we’re out we’re fine everything’s fine just eat some bread it’ll heal it all I’ll be okay right um oh I’m back wait this isn’t my house this isn’t my bed either where am

I as I was on my way back to my house I found this big tall guy he kind of scared me for some reason so I decided to kill him now I have an ender pearl one down many more to go ah thank God back home again I’m just happy to see my

House again and my double doors I missed you so much well let’s not get tooo settled in here we need to go back to hell to do some of our chores otherwise my Mommy’s going to be mad at me so here we go first thing I got to do is kill some

Of these tall guys and steal their B I mean pearls yeah pearls okay I just need a few more there’s one what is he doing y all right buddy well looks like he’s fine cuz he just killed me ooh what’s up Bean stocks how’s the weather

Up there losers I’m sorry I didn’t mean it I swear it was just a joke R I was just being a bit funny you know little joke bit of a prank just a bit bro so since all these tall people are just too mean I think I’ll just try trading with

The pig people they can give me pearls too as long as I give them enough money money what dude ah get out of here man ah now I can’t get any more ball I mean pearls ow wow look at that there’s this funky looking Castle I want what kind of

Funky things I’ll find inside oh hey look a bunch of funky things oh no so I killed this guy and he just happened to have a blaze rod so cool I guess another goal complete just got to kill a bunch more okay just got to trade a bit more

To get the rest of the Ender Pearls this should be pretty easy though I really got to stop saying that I I mean I just keep this keeps happening I I died okay great perfect now that I’ve been reincarnated once more it’s time to get ready to beat the

Game first first we got to craft as many eyes of enders as we can I really love how they stare deep into my soul it makes me feel so comfortable I also made sure to grab some diamonds so we can craft some cool clothes these Diamond

Pants suck though I’m so chaed so next we got to throw the eyes and see where they land hopefully they don’t all break before I find the stronghold oh that was the last eye well guys that’s it I can’t beat the game now well

I guess I could just go get the stuff to make some more eyes but that’s too hard to do especially when I’m all sad thanks for watching you guys make sure to like comment and subscribe what the the torch oh there’s a path of them I wonder where this leads

To what is this definitely not a stronghold smiley face oh there’s a chest here too holy crap look at all this the Kami Slayer forged by Joseph McCarthy himself how all right now that we have all these cool and definitely legitimately obtained items we still

Have a chance to beat the game all right let’s hope this sign is telling the Truth here it is the stronghold okay we’re back on track we better hurry to make up for that time I spent moping around like a loser ew a li Library looks like nobody’s been here for a while probably cuz it’s so lame ooh epic Library burn oh oh there it is

The portal Legend says if you put the ball I mean eyes in all the holes in this portal it will open the gate to the end of the game wao pretty well in we go W look at all this cheese looks like we finally made it to

Oh yeah I don’t know why they called it that that’s a bit on the nose but okay all right all we got to do is defeat that Dragon but to do that we got to destroy those Crystal things cuz then they’ll just keep healing the dragon ew

He’s spitting bile at me just like my great great grandma before she succumbed to the rock all right let me just build my way up to the tower and um screw this I’m just going to teleport oh that worked Al you all right third times the charm will this work oh

Okay that that’s actually kind of cool all right awesome thanks a I’m not again all right just a few more uh hey ah get away what that’s the last Crystal down now we can attack Gordon the Geck over here all right come on buddy you like Forks huh

I’m going to eat you oh that okay well I guess I’ll just shoot you with this bow and arrow instead all right come on let’s do this mono Amano or whatever the Spanish say axe axe axe hey uh Mr Dragon can I ask you a question oh

No oh I can’t believe I did that ow my legs hurt come here face me like a man Dragon I will beat you go come on yes oh my my God I guess that’s it he’s dead and he’s turned into a bunch of green balls which I’m now collecting in my body well yeah that’s pretty cool hold on I’m just going to grab this egg right here A O an egg aw ooh an egg a ooh an egg eg a oh what

Oh all right it’s time to head back that’s was a pretty good job well done Huh back here again is it all a dream ah not a dream not a dream ah E